I know it's not really, but stuff like this feels bigoted to me. I know we red states deserve no better because we're utter garbage, but, dangit, it's my homeland and I resent being talked about like this.
I know it's humor, but humor is no excuse. Being funny excuses nothing.
I know it's not really, but stuff like this feels bigoted to me. I know we red states deserve no better because we're utter garbage, but, dangit, it's my homeland and I resent being talked about like this.
I know it's humor, but humor is no excuse. Being funny excuses nothing.
why does the entirety of Ukraine have a twitter account
I like Sweden's twitter (@Sweden) where they just like, pick a citizen at random every week, and give them the keys? I guess there's probably some vetting. Right now it's Erik's turn.
why does the entirety of Ukraine have a twitter account
I like Sweden's twitter (@Sweden) where they just like, pick a citizen at random every week, and give them the keys? I guess there's probably some vetting. Right now it's Erik's turn.
You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
A Touhou AU where Marisa steals floppy disks instead of books
I mean C- implies that it's not a failure word salad, and with something like that the distribution is obviously bimodal, either it's dumb crap or it's dumb genius. so it should be an A
Gosh! I thought you might have gotten a little tired listening to me ramble on and on about my cats and whatnot, who are doing wonderful by the way, tootsie just had her kittens! Seventy four and a half of them! I named the first one Fleckle after my ma because he's mottled black and purple, I named the second one Tibbles, that's a girl and both her tails are red paisley, third one's Sassafras and she's- So where was I? Gertrude, that's the fourth kitten, and she's horizontally inverted with the cutest transparent patches. Then there's Schleppy, a speckled male with detached paws. Kwamp is the roundest, and I'm always finding him in the chute rack, spooking the shoots! I'd feel sorry for them if they hadn't tried to defunnelize Samson, the maine coon, who knows half his alphabet already. Then, let's see... there's Virginia, with four white socks on her feet and sixteen exomandibles. I found her stacking my rainboots to the ceiling before she could even open her eye! Tiddo is her identical sister, but she doesn't have her joints yet. She's a later jointinator, it happens. I put her on a little plank with some wheels so she can at least push herself around with her exhaust. Adam is a hairless long-eye, and gets his eyes so tangled in my curtains I had to roll them up under his trimouth! Horace didn't come out the right way sadly, but what he lacks in feline anatomy he makes up for in photosynthesis! Lowest maintenance you could ask for, you know... and then there's sally, the tortoiseshell, she spends most of her layers retracted but comes out when she smells purple, her favorite! Loafus is the most spherical of the siblings, but Clobbus is the most antispherical. They don't get along unless Gertie is around to link their sockets. Aurelia is the long haired hairless, and likes to stay encysted in her older brother, Fibula. Spiny is the inverse side of her sister Tina, and sometimes she just doesn't want to invert until she's had a foam bath, which tina hates by the way! Zermillion is already on her fifth head, bu she won't let me recycle the rest. I don't even know where she keeps hiding them! Waffles go this name because he was born waffles, but he concept-o-corrected by the time he was done nursing. There's also the four green-line shivers, who refused to be named until they stop sharing a vessel. Princess Crabbo exploded when she realized what a table really was, but the vet sponged her up and she's gotten pretty comfy in her spongeform. Her brother Thomas wasn't so happy about it, since it was his favorite sponge we had to use, but I got him a new window to stare out of until she gets bored and decides to properly solidify. The spotted sister, Squamous... well... we don't talk about her right now, but we can talk about Viceroy, that's the short-hairlessed haired... ...anyway, that Viceroy is one of my favorite cats, but that might be because she's the most boneless. Karen is the one that's luminescent when you think about socket wrenches, which comes in pretty handy when you need to tighten her bolts in the dark, but that always spooks Mortimer, who associates light with triangles, and we all know how triangles and cats get along. Eve is a black-eyed manx who can only locomote diagonally, and her sister, Butternut, locomotes only internally. The places she goes inside must be pretty exciting the way her tails whirl around! Robin left his mouth somewhere in the yard, but I can tell it's finding plenty of food wherever it is since he's really packing on the pounds. Artie can peel himself without any implements but he's pretty bad at putting it back on the right way, and scared the heck out of his brother, Scoob, a long hair ragdoll who graduated top of his class in cat-being! Flattycake is a persian still learning how to manifest dimension, but getting along pretty well with just the two so far. CAT actually might not be one of the kittens, but she showed up in the same layer they were born and "CAT" is written over her in letters that look way too important to be lying. She makes good cheese, too, but I wish she wouldn't leave a trail of it everywhere she slithers. That reminds me, I named the little half-spotted rex "Slither" because it's her favorite thing to do, even when she's wearing all her legs. That cat Slithers into the funniest predicaments, I swear! Sinbad likes sleeping underwater, Loretta likes sleeping overwater and their brother Cardboard likes it sidewater. Weebo is comprised of thirteen percent mercury and can only count backwards, Pungus got in the habit of shedding everything but her hair and only has hair left, Footwarp plays bass in an experimental thrash band with a couple of redworms she met in a sewer, collection, Arpdiller is a semiarboreal upside-downish with an alphabetized ham collection, Gorp'n hasn't been allowed out since she ran over a truck, Skelly traded her eyes for wings but has difficulty navigating through gelatin, Cauliflower only exists in half-orange light, Snowplow lost her biovessel and became only soundwaves, Potassium has a lot of APPEAL!!! HAHA!!! APPEAL!!! HAAAAAAA! HAHAHAHA!! HAHAAHHA! APPEAL!!! BECAUSE HER SKIN FELL OFF!! HAAAAAAAaaaaa Mister Bloap is a male tuxedo but I think he's planning to molt into a scale trenchcoat next, Double Giblets invented a numerical flavor but doesn't seem to understand the patent office, Not Mister Bloap is the one that's not Mister Bloap, Unk wasn't originally a cat but accidentally wound up getting born and, well, you know how sometimes you get born and you're a cat now, you know?! Stoppit can spin at about 99 layers per nanospiral and is currently drilling her way through a big ball of dirt out in the grey zone, Lobster ate an entire weffler and liquified unilaterally, also he's got this cute little white spot on his forehead. Potatobird is made out of old magazines right now, and got a little soggy after her silverfish bath. Two Spoons likes to go door to door juggling her hearts but I'm not so sure they enjoy being tossed around like that, Half Circle and Number W trade color schemes every lunch break with the other cats down at the plant so it gets kinda hard telling them apart, -------- sold her name for some cheese crackers even though I kept telling her they just grow on trees anyway, right?! Kitties! Krehh''tll is a throbbing fafflenebber with blue specks and likes to swipe boots from flefferpedes, Vegetable Salty got her name because she came out writing a novelette about a whale that's mad all the time, T-Shirt Man rides a green motorbike, Thrubble gets smaller when she thinks too hard about dirt, Rockets can only sing about the wrong weather, the red triplets are Huey, Louie and Meanuloid, Blanket was born from a short film about carbohydrates, 1,1,1,1 is named for her number of vertebrae, Nerf is a foam rubber silicon-hair toadeye, No-head Jimmy Jim Jangles leaves little blue paw prints all over the definition of pudding so I gotta ask that you don't try to define pudding until I get back home and wash it off, and finally, Half of Mark is-
Today in Things Lucy Does Not Understand: grocery store pricing logic. At my local grocery store, eggos are currently on sale. 8-packs are $2.99, but only if you buy two or more of them. A 16-pack is $4.99.
Is it really possible that nobody saw anything wrong with this???
An update to this: I guess they figured it out because they're doing the same deal again but now 16-packs are not on sale.
Instead, they're $5.99 as usual, meaning you can save an entire cent by buying two 8-packs instead!
You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
Comments
I'd probably have found it funny when I was fifteen tho
☭
B̤̺͍̰͕̺̠̕u҉̖͙̝̮͕̲ͅm̟̼̦̠̹̙p͡s̹͖ ̻T́h̗̫͈̙̩r̮e̴̩̺̖̠̭̜ͅa̛̪̟͍̣͎͖̺d͉̦͠s͕̞͚̲͍ ̲̬̹̤Y̻̤̱o̭͠u̥͉̥̜͡ ̴̥̪D̳̲̳̤o̴͙̘͓̤̟̗͇n̰̗̞̼̳͙͖͢'҉͖t̳͓̣͍̗̰ ͉W̝̳͓̼͜a̗͉̳͖̘̮n͕ͅt͚̟͚ ̸̺T̜̖̖̺͎̱ͅo̭̪̰̼̥̜ ̼͍̟̝R̝̹̮̭ͅͅe̡̗͇a͍̘̤͉͘d̼̜ 
⚢
Instead, they're $5.99 as usual, meaning you can save an entire cent by buying two 8-packs instead!