The Trash Heap of the Heapers' Hangout

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  • edited 2016-06-14 18:11:54

    my Lukewarm Take on free will, informed by like the maybe 3 studies ive read on the subject and several books of moderate merit (so u know it's legit) is that our brains do a lot of small-to-midscale stuff automatically to conserve on brainpower for actual important decisions, but we think we consciously do those things to maintain continuity of experience or something like that

    at least, that's the possibility that makes the most sense to me, and seems most in line with my personal experiences
  • My dreams exceed my real life
    I feel like it's one of those Um Actually phrases you can use to pwn the unsuspecting, so it's never going away.

    Like the Christ Myth Theory. Or that other nations than the USA had slaves at one point or another.
  • Touch the cow. Do it now.
    Um Actually
  • Have you ever read a book where you've wanted to punch the main character because they are bloody annoying?
  • Toolsie said:

    Have you ever read a book where you've wanted to punch the main character because they are bloody annoying?

    Yes. Very much so.
  • Toolsie said:

    Have you ever read a book where you've wanted to punch the main character because they are bloody annoying?

    Aloysius Xingu L Pendergast
  • Toolsie said:

    Have you ever read a book where you've wanted to punch the main character because they are bloody annoying?

    Aloysius Xingu L Pendergast
    Well-learned in many subjects, he converses easily with doctors, scientists, intellectuals, vagabonds, highly specialized masters of specific disciplines, and people of a wide variety of language and culture alike. He is a master of psychological manipulation, disguise, and improvisation.

    Pendergast appreciates the finer things in life, including expensive cuisine and wines. Foods and drinks he enjoys include Château Pétrus wine, antipasto, green tea of only the purest and most spiritual kind, gelato, and steak tartare. He has a great distaste for opera. His interests encompass a wide variety of vastly differing walks of life, yet all focus on the enlightenment of the human mind, body, and soul. He spent a year in Tibet studying the deep meditative art of Chongg Ran, taught to him by the monks of the Gsalrig Chongg monastery.

    Pendergast is polyglot, demonstrating mastery of French, Italian, Latin, Greek, Portuguese and Cantonese, and appears semi-fluent in Mandarin. He also has some knowledge of Japanese.

    Pendergast once served with the U.S. Special Forces. Most of his military records are classified and unknown.

    He has platinum blond hair and ice-blue eyes that often look grey in different lighting. Pendergast religiously dresses in a black, hand-tailored suit made of a special blend of wool not made since the 1950s, and is consequently described as looking like an undertaker.

    In many cases, Pendergast's normal appearance is irrelevant. A master of disguises, he has fooled even close acquaintances on several occasions.
    oh my fucking god
  • So I just massacred a nice, happy, family in The Sims 3
  • Also, this section of a book I have made me want to punch someone:

    "Adolescence had been kind to her. Her almost translucent white skin hadn't suffered the effects of acne and her blonde hair had never been greasy. She was a small, lithe fifteen-year-old with a perfectly oval face and light green eyes. She'd always been thin, but not too thin, and had even developed some curves in the last few years. Her limbs were long and willowy and she walked with a dancer's grace, despite having never taken lessons." 
  • You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
    “So I just massacred a nice, happy, family”—Emily Tools, 2016
  • My dreams exceed my real life
  • “So I just massacred a nice, happy, family”—Emily Tools, 2016

    When taken out of context, it does sound, erm... Bad.

    But you wouldn't expect anything less from me, right?
  • “I'm surprised. Those clothes… but, aren't you…?”
    Toolsie said:

    Also, this section of a book I have made me want to punch someone:


    "Adolescence had been kind to her. Her almost translucent white skin hadn't suffered the effects of acne and her blonde hair had never been greasy. She was a small, lithe fifteen-year-old with a perfectly oval face and light green eyes. She'd always been thin, but not too thin, and had even developed some curves in the last few years. Her limbs were long and willowy and she walked with a dancer's grace, despite having never taken lessons." 

    This sounds like a set-up for something very, very bad happening to this character. That aside, it's at least tasteful compared to some descriptions of beauty I've seen.
  • Toolsie said:

    Have you ever read a book where you've wanted to punch the main character because they are bloody annoying?

    Aloysius Xingu L Pendergast
    Well-learned in many subjects, he converses easily with doctors, scientists, intellectuals, vagabonds, highly specialized masters of specific disciplines, and people of a wide variety of language and culture alike. He is a master of psychological manipulation, disguise, and improvisation.

    Pendergast appreciates the finer things in life, including expensive cuisine and wines. Foods and drinks he enjoys include Château Pétrus wine, antipasto, green tea of only the purest and most spiritual kind, gelato, and steak tartare. He has a great distaste for opera. His interests encompass a wide variety of vastly differing walks of life, yet all focus on the enlightenment of the human mind, body, and soul. He spent a year in Tibet studying the deep meditative art of Chongg Ran, taught to him by the monks of the Gsalrig Chongg monastery.

    Pendergast is polyglot, demonstrating mastery of French, Italian, Latin, Greek, Portuguese and Cantonese, and appears semi-fluent in Mandarin. He also has some knowledge of Japanese.

    Pendergast once served with the U.S. Special Forces. Most of his military records are classified and unknown.

    He has platinum blond hair and ice-blue eyes that often look grey in different lighting. Pendergast religiously dresses in a black, hand-tailored suit made of a special blend of wool not made since the 1950s, and is consequently described as looking like an undertaker.

    In many cases, Pendergast's normal appearance is irrelevant. A master of disguises, he has fooled even close acquaintances on several occasions.
    oh my fucking god
    This man has 16 books written about him.

    If the quality is as same as in Cabinet of Curiosities, then they would all be palpable mediocrity, were it not for the soul-sucking nature of Aloysius Pendegast

    Did you know that his middle name isn't even an actual Asian term? I think Kraken confirmed it for me last time I brought him up
  • of course it isnt
  • Xingu sounds like the name of a mobile phone game company.
  • oh hey it does
  • edited 2016-06-14 21:12:09
    fight. dream. horse. love.
    "When I first met you I thought you were gay."

    "Why? Cos I'm English?"

    "Uh-uh. Because you seemed to know so many people who were dead."
    well damn, Neil Gaiman
  • Where is that from? It feel like it's from a Gaiman thing I read but I can't think of which one.
  • edited 2016-06-14 21:21:25
    We can do anything if we do it together.
    The last volume of Sandman.

    That line is sadly relevant again...
  • Oh, huh, I never read that far in Sandman, I guess I just saw it quoted somewhere before.

    Also, yeah...
  • About The Sims 3 massacre:

    I had a nice little family going on that consisted of Amy and Adam Stoner and their five children: Jaune, Violet, Blaze, Ivy and Neptune. Ivy was a master of music and painting, and Adam wanted to save 30 Sims from house fires, earthquakes etc. Amy had green hair and orange eyes, and I wanted the heir of the next gen to have her genetics. Only one child had her genetics, and that was Ivy. Problem is, she was ugly as shit. So since there was room for one more child in the family, Amy and Adam tried for another baby. But then, Adam went off to do put out a house fire, but the game glitched out and her could not complete the job, despite the fire bell ringing like crazy. So he was forced to quit his job, and then he shortly starved to death after that. Amy then popped out twins since a new space had opened up in Adam's absence, and these twins were called Ruby and Noir. Ruby had Amy's genetics, and was quite pretty, so I killed off Ivy and Neptune by drowning them in the pool. By this point, my murder senses had awoken, and I decided that I was going to carry on the legacy with the three children I didn't hate: Jaune, Violet and Blaze (Blaze Stoner was an accidental perfect name). So I put Amy, Ruby and Noir (whom I had aged up into children) into the kitchen, deleted the fire alarm and doors, and set the oven on fire. Whilst the fire blazed on (no pun intended), Blaze and Violet were in the swimming pool. They were so distracted by the fire that they drowned in the pool. Add insult to injury, Amy, Ruby and Noir survived. So I tried again with the fireplace. Again, they survived. So I locked them in a small room with a firework and only Noir died. I made Amy starve to death and drowned Ruby. By this time, Jaune was so depressed at all these deaths that he basically starved himself to death.

    And that is the story of the Stoner Massacre. 
  • Jane said:

    Xingu sounds like the name of a mobile phone game company.

    xanga + pingu
  • “I'm surprised. Those clothes… but, aren't you…?”

    Toolsie said:

    Have you ever read a book where you've wanted to punch the main character because they are bloody annoying?

    Aloysius Xingu L Pendergast
    Well-learned in many subjects, he converses easily with doctors, scientists, intellectuals, vagabonds, highly specialized masters of specific disciplines, and people of a wide variety of language and culture alike. He is a master of psychological manipulation, disguise, and improvisation.

    Pendergast appreciates the finer things in life, including expensive cuisine and wines. Foods and drinks he enjoys include Château Pétrus wine, antipasto, green tea of only the purest and most spiritual kind, gelato, and steak tartare. He has a great distaste for opera. His interests encompass a wide variety of vastly differing walks of life, yet all focus on the enlightenment of the human mind, body, and soul. He spent a year in Tibet studying the deep meditative art of Chongg Ran, taught to him by the monks of the Gsalrig Chongg monastery.

    Pendergast is polyglot, demonstrating mastery of French, Italian, Latin, Greek, Portuguese and Cantonese, and appears semi-fluent in Mandarin. He also has some knowledge of Japanese.

    Pendergast once served with the U.S. Special Forces. Most of his military records are classified and unknown.

    He has platinum blond hair and ice-blue eyes that often look grey in different lighting. Pendergast religiously dresses in a black, hand-tailored suit made of a special blend of wool not made since the 1950s, and is consequently described as looking like an undertaker.

    In many cases, Pendergast's normal appearance is irrelevant. A master of disguises, he has fooled even close acquaintances on several occasions.
    oh my fucking god
    This man has 16 books written about him.

    If the quality is as same as in Cabinet of Curiosities, then they would all be palpable mediocrity, were it not for the soul-sucking nature of Aloysius Pendegast

    Did you know that his middle name isn't even an actual Asian term? I think Kraken confirmed it for me last time I brought him up

    It's an Amazon tributary. When in doubt, look it up.
  • kill living beings
    that would explain the portuguese. Sorta. Maybe not a lot of actual Portuguese deep in the woods. Also the second paragraph on makes me want to stare sternly at the author rather than give them the benefit of the doubt.
  • My dreams exceed my real life
    I am weaning myself off of Diet Coke, but it might not mean anything if the physiological effects go away because I'll still want to be drinking something other than water
  • I am pretty sure I will never fully wean myself off of Diet Coke.

    It's like some kind of weird tradeoff. Having a terrible diet is slightly less bad for you than smoking, drinking, drug abuse, and all those other fun things, but everyone hates you for it.
  • I've learned to tolerate drama...except on the boat
    being overweight most of my life has not been fun

    being picked on, mother crying about how i'll die young if I don't change course...

    i'm not as fat as i used to be but it still haunts me
  • My dreams exceed my real life
    Jane said:

    I am pretty sure I will never fully wean myself off of Diet Coke.


    It's like some kind of weird tradeoff. Having a terrible diet is slightly less bad for you than smoking, drinking, drug abuse, and all those other fun things, but everyone hates you for it.
    Oh my god, yes.

    I am pretty sure I would have gotten less shit if I smoked a pack a day
  • I mostly don't drink soda anymore, aside from when I go out to eat at a place where that is the most suitable beverage option

    the idea of getting shit over it is kinda strange
  • Just be happy you've never been told that you deserve to die alone because you eat at McDonald's, lol.
  • edited 2016-06-14 22:17:35

    OH but I will never forget when Julian's dad says "you know diet soda is bad for you", AND THEN LESS THAN 15 MINUTES LATER LIGHTS A CIGARETTE
  • OH but I will never forget when Julian's dad says "you know diet soda is bad for you", AND THEN LESS THAN 15 MINUTES LATER LIGHTS A CIGARETTE

    this is my aunt, the one that freaked out about soft pretzels that one time?

    also a chain smoker
  • my diet is still pretty shit, I just don't eat as much
  • My dreams exceed my real life

    I mostly don't drink soda anymore, aside from when I go out to eat at a place where that is the most suitable beverage option

    the idea of getting shit over it is kinda strange

    A random guy once almost got into a literal fight with me at a 7/11 because I was buying two diet cokes
  • wait wait wait wait, let's all back up a moment here

    are y'all telling me that you have relatives that will get up in your grill, not for large-scale diet issues, but because of your occasional snack choices
  • My dreams exceed my real life
    Well I mean I do drink a lot of diet coke
  • i used to drink 3 cans of diet coke a day
  • wait wait wait wait, let's all back up a moment here

    are y'all telling me that you have relatives that will get up in your grill, not for large-scale diet issues, but because of your occasional snack choices

    relatives?

    This is like random strangers, dude. I mean my aunt does too but she's far from the only person.

    Usually on the internet, but not always.
  • I've learned to tolerate drama...except on the boat
    Odradek said:

    I mostly don't drink soda anymore, aside from when I go out to eat at a place where that is the most suitable beverage option

    the idea of getting shit over it is kinda strange

    A random guy once almost got into a literal fight with me at a 7/11 because I was buying two diet cokes
    no wonder you want to get out so bad
  • My dreams exceed my real life
    Anonus said:

    Odradek said:

    I mostly don't drink soda anymore, aside from when I go out to eat at a place where that is the most suitable beverage option

    the idea of getting shit over it is kinda strange

    A random guy once almost got into a literal fight with me at a 7/11 because I was buying two diet cokes
    no wonder you want to get out so bad
    THANK YOU
  • edited 2016-06-14 22:28:47

    Odradek said:

    I mostly don't drink soda anymore, aside from when I go out to eat at a place where that is the most suitable beverage option

    the idea of getting shit over it is kinda strange

    A random guy once almost got into a literal fight with me at a 7/11 because I was buying two diet cokes

    ????????????¿¿¿¿¿¿¿????????????
  • You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
    Mara Wilson is bi.

    Now Matilda is even more relatable to me! :P
  • @Sredni: In my defense, they did mention the River somewhere in the wikipedia article, but I assumed they made it up.

    It's still contrived as hell though. The reason he got that as a middle name is because his great-great uncle died while exploring near it.
  • wait wait wait wait, let's all back up a moment here

    are y'all telling me that you have relatives that will get up in your grill, not for large-scale diet issues, but because of your occasional snack choices

    My aunt bitched at me for getting a candy bar once

    This is in addition to the many times she's bitched about my food eating

    Before I had any capacity to eat healthy because I wasn't the one buying groceries

    She really is the worst

  • "It's easy to eat healthy, just buy foods with ingredients you can pronounce"

    Oh you big stupid fucking idiot #stillbitter
  • My dreams exceed my real life
    He was being weirdly over-friendly, and then he started talking about diet soda and got super agressive the moment I showed the slightest resistance.

    I walked away, and thankfully he didn't follow.
  • Munch munch, chomp chomp...

    Mara Wilson is bi.


    Now Matilda is even more relatable to me! :P
    Yeah, I like that!
    Kexruct said:

    "It's easy to eat healthy, just buy foods with ingredients you can pronounce"

    Oh you big stupid fucking idiot #stillbitter

    Geez.
  • My dreams exceed my real life
    Kexruct said:

    "It's easy to eat healthy, just buy foods with ingredients you can pronounce"

    Oh you big stupid fucking idiot #stillbitter

    Someone find that big old thread Tzetze made complaining about this.
  • ...and I just realized that the guy listed as his great-great uncle, Percy Fawcett, was actually a real guy. As in, someone in real life who actually did disappear near that river.

    That...somehow makes it even stupider. 
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