The Trash Heap of the Heapers' Hangout

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  • Smee, Maiman, Doktar, Pavelier, Button-Lee, Juan Ovyu
    This can't be....
  • You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
    (Lesbianna and Caroline sit around the kitchen table at their parents' house, looking over Caroline's finances.)

    LESBIANNA: What the hell, Caroline. How did you spend so much on your credit cards in December?

    CAROLINE: I had some unexpected expenses.

    LESBIANNA: Like what? Did your car break down or something?

    CAROLINE: No...I just, you know, had to buy some things.

    LESBIANNA: What things?

    CAROLINE: You know...a few Christmas presents.

    LESBIANNA: Christmas presents were an unexpected expense?

    CAROLINE: Well, yeah. I wasn't planning on it or anything.

    LESBIANNA: Ah, I know exactly how that goes.

    LESBIANNA: Like, you're just sitting around minding your own business and making out with horses and then suddenly it's Christmas!

    LESBIANNA: If only there were some way to know in advance when Christmas was going to happen! But sadly, that's just a far-fetched fantasy.

    CAROLINE: Alright, alright, I get it.

    LESBIANNA: So you bought $2000 worth of Christmas presents?

    CAROLINE: Give or take.

    LESBIANNA: Give or take? What do you mean give or take?

    CAROLINE: Nothing, we'll call it $2000.

    LESBIANNA: Who on earth did you spend $2000 on for Christmas?

    CAROLINE: You know, Mom, Dad, you...

    LESBIANNA: ...Go on.

    CAROLINE: Maaaybe a few things for myself.

    LESBIANNA: A few things? Like what?

    CAROLINE: Well, my old gaming rig was starting to look pretty old, and--

    LESBIANNA: Ok, you know what, I can't do this anymore. You're just digging your own grave, Caroline.

    CAROLINE: Lesbianna, wait!

    LESBIANNA: No. I'm going out for coffee. If you're lucky I might come back by 3 AM.
  • kill living beings
    is that the gta font
  • Is making out with horses a regular thing here

    In this universe. Not the heap. Felt the need to specify.
  • kill living beings
    paying for dates
  • You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022

    Is making out with horses a regular thing here


    In this universe. Not the heap. Felt the need to specify.
    They don't call Caroline "Lady Horsefucker" for nothing

    (Why yes, I am attempting to tie my bits of Heap nonsense together in the most contrived way possible, why do you ask?)
  • Smee, Maiman, Doktar, Pavelier, Button-Lee, Juan Ovyu

    is that the gta font

    It's also the The Price is Right Font
  • kill living beings
    good point
  • ...And even when your hope is gone
    move along, move along, just to make it through
    (2015 self)

    Is making out with horses a regular thing here


    In this universe. Not the heap. Felt the need to specify.
    They don't call Caroline "Lady Horsefucker" for nothing

    (Why yes, I am attempting to tie my bits of Heap nonsense together in the most contrived way possible, why do you ask?)

    aeugh!

    'mma not get arrested for being on this site, am I?

    This is some shady stuff.
  • kill living beings
    bestiality is actually legal in a lot of places, because nobody's bothered to criminalize it, because it's uncommon.

    though it's illegal in my state thanks to Mr. Hands.
  • edited 2014-08-04 19:11:00
    kill living beings
    ed: doublepost
  • ...And even when your hope is gone
    move along, move along, just to make it through
    (2015 self)
    My parents yell at me enough for being on this site, it's a good thing they can't see this page.

    (also, I am SO not citing you guys as a reference on any application for a job.)
  • Is making out with horses a regular thing here


    In this universe. Not the heap. Felt the need to specify.
    They don't call Caroline "Lady Horsefucker" for nothing

    (Why yes, I am attempting to tie my bits of Heap nonsense together in the most contrived way possible, why do you ask?)
    I did think about whether Caroline was the aforementioned lady.
  • “I'm surprised. Those clothes… but, aren't you…?”
    On a different note, I love that there is an actual term for how ridiculously similar flowers in the daisy family can be.
  • ...And even when your hope is gone
    move along, move along, just to make it through
    (2015 self)

    On a different note, I love that there is an actual term for how ridiculously similar flowers in the daisy family can be.

    Flowers are important.

    It's a bad sign that we have so few terms of that nature, and so goshadarn many for politics and war.
  • You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
    At one point I'd tried handwaving it by saying that Caroline can talk to animals and thus obtain consent

    Though admittedly this seems like a waste of a perfectly good superpower and it doesn't really fit in with the "Caroline is a loser" theme
  • "...and then I spent a couple of years on this forum"

    "And how do you think your experience there makes you a good fit for this position?"

    "A good knowledge of Vanilla markup, ease of interaction with LGBTQIA proponents, and the complete knowledge of all fonts in its purest, holiest and uncut form."
  • edited 2014-08-04 19:14:38
    “I'm surprised. Those clothes… but, aren't you…?”
    ^^^^ Oh, they are, and I do not disagree. But as an amateur herbalist I would really like to be sure that I'm not picking something deadly and horrible rather than healthful or delicious.
  • “I'm surprised. Those clothes… but, aren't you…?”

    "...and then I spent a couple of years on this forum"


    "And how do you think your experience there makes you a good fit for this position?"

    "A good knowledge of Vanilla markup, ease of interaction with LGBTQIA proponents, and the complete knowledge of all fonts in its purest, holiest and uncut form."
    Lest we forget developing a working knowledge of electronic dance music genres by osmosis.
  • edited 2014-08-04 19:19:23
    ...And even when your hope is gone
    move along, move along, just to make it through
    (2015 self)

    "...and then I spent a couple of years on this forum"


    "And how do you think your experience there makes you a good fit for this position?"

    "A good knowledge of Vanilla markup, ease of interaction with LGBTQIA proponents, and the complete knowledge of all fonts in its purest, holiest and uncut form."
    "We're sorry, but there seems to be some silliness here, and that is completely unsuitable.  We, at the upright legitimate job of awesomeness where it makes your opinions matter and you get to read books, must reject you on account of holy crud, some of these words are swears, and at least one is misspelled!  And some of the people here complain about rules and police!  What sort of subversive friends do you have?"


  • “I'm surprised. Those clothes… but, aren't you…?”
    "But you can distinguish between breakcore and IDM within ten seconds despite having no interest in either, so we'll hire you anyway."
  • edited 2014-08-04 19:27:02
    ...And even when your hope is gone
    move along, move along, just to make it through
    (2015 self)
    Come on, the upright legitimate job of awesomeness where it makes your opinions matter and you get to read books would so totally reject me.  I'd be disappointed if it didn't.

    More like 

    "We'll have to reject you and mark you... a descriptivist by association!  Turn in your prescriptivist licence! Also, you need to go back to middle school... for ever and always!"

    -and then Aliroz woke from that dang recurring nightmare-
  • Off-panel speaker: I'm sorry, Aliroz, but we feel you're not the best qualified application for this position.
    Aliroz: But have you examined Appendix A of my resume, in which I've recorded my time masquerading as a Suchian locus of European historical knowledge on a silly internet forum?
    Off-panel speaker: !! 
    Off-panel speaker: I have NOT
  • edited 2014-08-04 19:29:17
    ...And even when your hope is gone
    move along, move along, just to make it through
    (2015 self)

    Off-panel speaker: I'm sorry, Aliroz, but we feel you're not the best qualified application for this position.

    Aliroz: But have you examined Appendix A of my resume, in which I've recorded my time masquerading as a Suchian locus of European historical knowledge on a silly internet forum?
    Off-panel speaker: !! 
    Off-panel speaker: I have NOT
    Off-Panel Speaker:  This changes EVERYTHING!
    Aliroz:  Is this a "we have to kill you and hide the body" sort of "this changes everything" or a "and now we shall make you our emperor" kind of "this changes everything" or a "you need to go into the witness protection program" version of "this changes everything" or a "you are instantly hired" meaning of "this changes everything"
    Off-panel Speaker:  I'm certainly not going to tell you.  But be in uniform by six on thursday.
  • image Wee yea erra chs hymmnos mea.
    image

    So, yeah, beat Twintania in FFXIV today. Fun times.

    (To explain, Twintania is one of the hardest bosses in the game, and absolutely requires an organised group to take down.)
  • I've learned to tolerate drama...except on the boat

    is that the gta font

    It's also the The Price is Right Font
    The Price is Right font

  • Smee, Maiman, Doktar, Pavelier, Button-Lee, Juan Ovyu
    But the font of Capcom's logo and Jeopardy's questions is still the same, right?

    C'mon man my entire worldview depends on this
  • You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
    Anonus said:

    is that the gta font

    It's also the The Price is Right Font
    The Price is Right font

    It's worth mentioning, at least, that Pricedown was directly inspired by The Price is Right logo

    So nohay was half-right
  • You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
    IJBM: privatization of services that are inherently monopolies

    OSU, for instance, privatized their parking operations back in 2012

    So all the on-campus parking is now operated by a single for-profit corporation

    And if you're dissatisfied with their service, it's not like you can just go to a competitor, because...you know, there's only one (Columbus) OSU campus
  • I've learned to tolerate drama...except on the boat

    Anonus said:

    is that the gta font

    It's also the The Price is Right Font
    The Price is Right font

    It's worth mentioning, at least, that Pricedown was directly inspired by The Price is Right logo

    So nohay was half-right
    Yes

    But they're not the same thing

    As for the Capcom logo and Jeopardy! questions, they are both set in ITC Korinna
  • You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
    Speaking of logos that Ray Larabie built freeware fonts around

    Do you happen to know the original typeface used in the PlayStation wordmark? I've always wondered...
  • “I'm surprised. Those clothes… but, aren't you…?”
    Anonus said:

    Yes


    But they're not the same thing

    As for the Capcom logo and Jeopardy! questions, they are both set in ITC Korinna
    Have you ever considered perhaps mentioning if one thing inspired the other when correcting someone? Just saying "you're wrong" makes people feel stupid and makes you look pedantic, both of which are bad.
  • I've learned to tolerate drama...except on the boat

    Anonus said:

    Yes


    But they're not the same thing

    As for the Capcom logo and Jeopardy! questions, they are both set in ITC Korinna
    Have you ever considered perhaps mentioning if one thing inspired the other when correcting someone? Just saying "you're wrong" makes people feel stupid and makes you look pedantic, both of which are bad.
    That's what I was trying to get at

    I was too vague
  • “I'm surprised. Those clothes… but, aren't you…?”
    Yeah, an explanation would have been helpful there.
  • Touch the cow. Do it now.
    moo
  • edited 2014-08-04 23:03:27
    ...And even when your hope is gone
    move along, move along, just to make it through
    (2015 self)
    Apologies.
  • My dreams exceed my real life

    Whate'er is born of mortal birth
    Must be consumèd with the earth,
    To rise from generation free:
    Then what have I to do with thee?

    The sexes sprung from shame and pride,
    Blowed in the morn, in evening died;
    But mercy changed death into sleep;
    The sexes rose to work and weep.

    Thou, mother of my mortal part,
    With cruelty didst mould my heart,
    And with false self-deceiving tears
    Didst bind my nostrils, eyes, and ears,

    Didst close my tongue in senseless clay,
    And me to mortal life betray.
    The death of Jesus set me free:
    Then what have I to do with thee?

  • edited 2014-08-04 23:03:13
    ...And even when your hope is gone
    move along, move along, just to make it through
    (2015 self)
    You guys get one guess as to why Whisper of the Heart is my favorite Ghibli film (well, second to From Up On Poppy Hill).
  • My dreams exceed my real life
    Odradek said:

    Dammit math nerds, in the end you did manage to prove antinatalism.

  • “I'm surprised. Those clothes… but, aren't you…?”
    Aliroz said:

    Have you ever considered perhaps mentioning if one thing inspired the other when correcting someone? Just saying "you're wrong" makes people feel stupid and makes you look pedantic, both of which are bad.

    Knock it off, Sredni.  I know you mean well, but your constant advice-giving is getting kind of old.
    Making other feel bad for not knowing things is not a good thing, even if it is unintentional. I have my own problems with being rude about correcting people and I have tried over time to get better about it, so seeing other people do it makes me uncomfortable.

    Capisce?
  • “I'm surprised. Those clothes… but, aren't you…?”
    Odradek said:

    Odradek said:

    Dammit math nerds, in the end you did manage to prove antinatalism.

    ...crap, if Tach never comes back then there will be no-one to finish the Zestpoole saga and I'll lose a whole third of the people who at all care about my little RPG thing.
  • edited 2014-08-04 23:03:38
    ...And even when your hope is gone
    move along, move along, just to make it through
    (2015 self)

    Aliroz said:

    Have you ever considered perhaps mentioning if one thing inspired the other when correcting someone? Just saying "you're wrong" makes people feel stupid and makes you look pedantic, both of which are bad.

    Knock it off, Sredni.  I know you mean well, but your constant advice-giving is getting kind of old.
    Making other feel bad for not knowing things is not a good thing, even if it is unintentional. I have my own problems with being rude about correcting people and I have tried over time to get better about it, so seeing other people do it makes me uncomfortable.

    Capisce?
    Alright.

    I'm sorry.
  • My dreams exceed my real life

    Odradek said:

    Odradek said:

    Dammit math nerds, in the end you did manage to prove antinatalism.

    ...crap, if Tach never comes back then there will be no-one to finish the Zestpoole saga and I'll lose a whole third of the people who at all care about my little RPG thing.
    Yes, I realized that too.
  • My dreams exceed my real life
    But really the destruction of the human race would be no tragedy if it took out math nerds.
  • ...And even when your hope is gone
    move along, move along, just to make it through
    (2015 self)
    Odradek said:

    But really the destruction of the human race would be no tragedy if it took out math nerds.

    I'm fine so long as us suchians are alright.
  • My dreams exceed my real life
    Crocodiles are the hated enemies of mathnerds and thus, should live.
  • You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
    Odradek said:

    But really the destruction of the human race would be no tragedy if it took out math nerds.

    *defends Lilly with a big-ass sword*
  • My dreams exceed my real life

    Odradek said:

    But really the destruction of the human race would be no tragedy if it took out math nerds.

    *defends Lilly with a big-ass sword*
    Lilly is not a math nerd.

    True math nerds do not like math, but use it and math-substitutes to explain everything.
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