CentraI Avenue's Road and Sign Babbling (btw Naney is a dork)

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  • My dreams exceed my real life
  • My dreams exceed my real life
    Probably one of the more obtuse jokes I've ever made.
  • You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
    This is the City of Columbus's official map of the boundaries of the North Linden Area Commission.

    image

    It amuses me on several levels:

    1. The accompanying text (not pictured here) lists the east border as "Conrail Road", as if it's a street name and not a railroad.
    2. Conrail hasn't existed as such in 14 years; its assets were split between Norfolk Southern and CSX in 1999. (A company called Conrail still exists, but they sure don't operate here.)
    3. The railroad tracks no longer physically exist! They were dismantled at least a decade ago, meaning that the city literally defines this legal border in terms of a nonexistent railroad track.
  • You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
    Also I just noticed that the CSX and Norfolk Southern tracks (which do still exist) are also labeled "Conrail" on that map. Smooth.
  • THIS MACHINE KILLS FASCISTS
    Wow, it's like fail upon fail upon fail.
  • For once, or maybe twice, I was in my prime.
    Oh crap, apparently I was onto something in my last post, because they are trying to silence me now. I just survived an attempt on my life by the traffic signals. I was in a left turn lane, and my green left turn arrow and the oncoming traffic's normal green light both lit up at the same time.

    I'm pretty sure that's what happened.
  • You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
    ...Wow, that's pretty bad.

    Signal controllers are supposed to have conflict monitors that can detect conflicting greens and throw everything to flashing red, but...things like that still manage to happen from time to time. :\
  • Well, thanks for reminding me that I can't take them for granted.
  • edited 2013-12-04 02:32:26
    You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
    Should technically probably be black on white instead of white on green because it's a regulatory message, but either way this sign appeals to me for some reason:
    image
  • I've learned to tolerate drama...except on the boat
    The application of ClearviewHwy is too uneven for my liking...
  • edited 2013-12-04 02:46:07
    You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
    I think you'd be driven crazy by some of the freeway signage around here. Since the recent construction, I-71 and I-670 each have some sign bridges where new ClearviewHwy signs have been posted alongside older FHWA Series signs. I don't have any pictures yet, because I'm always the one driving when I go through there...
  • You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
    image
  • good to know
  • You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
    This and the one on the opposite corner are the first Intelights I've seen in the wild

    Remember those old 3M signal heads that had a special system of lenses so their light could only be viewed from a very specific angle? This is the same concept but done electronically, in the form of an array of LEDs that can be programmed with software.

    It's pretty cool:

  • You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
    Trivia time!

    There is one United States jurisdiction where traffic drives on the left side of the road. Do you know what it is?
  • THIS MACHINE KILLS FASCISTS
    I know there's a section of I-5 in California where the left and right switch over, but aside from that...
  • Damnit, I looked up diverging diamond interchanges and now I'm watching Pinavia videos.
  • You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
    Spoiler:
    The U.S. Virgin Islands
  • “I'm surprised. Those clothes… but, aren't you…?”
    Odradek said:

    Probably one of the more obtuse jokes I've ever made.

    My uncle had an original copy of that LP, with the zipper.
  • You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
    VOTE FOR YOUR FAVORITE RAILROAD CROSSING TODAY!

    image

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  • imagei will watch the heck outta this pumpkin patch
    first one
  • You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
    It's the only one in this set that has the cantilevered signals!

    I need to get more (and better) pictures of crossing signs/signals, probably some time next year
  • You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
    I always did like those yellow-and-black Japanese crossbucks
  • You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
    image

    So...they went to the effort of patching the middle sign for the roadwork, but couldn't be arsed to replace the missing I-270 shield on the left sign while they were up there.
  • For once, or maybe twice, I was in my prime.
    I saw an odd failure of road sign design earlier today in Kansas. I was on the interstate, and there was a sign for the exit for a 61st St. Only it wasn't formatted like that. It was more like:

    61
    St St

    Like, whoever designed that sign realized that there was a danger of people parsing the sign as "61 street street" rather than "sixty-first street", but they thought changing the text size was the best solution.
  • You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
    Oh, wow. Sounds like some contractor just didn't care.
  • edited 2014-01-05 19:08:39
    sixty wonth street
    sixty tooth street
    sixty threeth street

    sixty zeroth street

    sixty negative wonth street

    sixty eleventh street
    sixty twenty wonth street

  • For once, or maybe twice, I was in my prime.
    Spotted in San Antonio, TX: an intersection where "left turn is permitted but must yield to oncoming traffic" is indicated by a blinking yellow arrow.
  • You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
    Ah, yes! That's done to avoid the "yellow trap"--essentially, a certain cycle where you have a yellow light, prompting someone waiting in the intersection to turn left (assuming oncoming traffic has a yellow as well), when in reality oncoming traffic still has green.

    This video explains it quite well, I think, as well as the now-obsolete "Dallas phasing" that was tested in the 2000s:

  • You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
    Maryland highway oddity: A planned I-170 freeway through Baltimore was cancelled in the 1970s...but not before a 1.4-mile long stretch was completed. The short, aborted freeway is now used as part of US 40.
  • You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
    Observation: the I-270 pull-through signs in Columbus traditionally had the I-270 shield with a control city and no cardinal direction...

    image

    ...but now they have the shield with a cardinal direction and no control city!

    image

    I wonder why ODOT changed that.

  • edited 2014-01-10 19:19:27
    > Easton

    S-on!
    E-on!
    W-on!
    N-on!

    SEWN-on!

    (or technically, SEWN-on!-on!-on!-on!)
  • You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
    It always amused me that the original 1990s signage (the "before" picture above) treated "Easton" as if it were the name of a town or city. It's a big commercial development.
  • What's the difference?
  • You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
    It's just unusual (in Ohio, at least) to see the development itself named as a destination instead of the street name.

    (And indeed, the newer signs refer to "Easton Way")
  • edited 2014-02-10 02:43:36
    You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022

    I took some photos of my traffic signs and license plates with my phone’s camera flash on, to make them appear as they would in a vehicle’s headlights




  • You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
  • and are you allowed to just take pictures of people's license plates like that?

    ...though I guess they are publicly visible...
  • You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
    Those are my own license plates, from my collection. They're all expired and I have them hanging on my wall.
  • there's a bar around here that attaches its menus to truck license plates
  • I've learned to tolerate drama...except on the boat
    ...why is this thread called "Ginormous Butts" now
  • Anonus said:

    ...why is this thread called "Ginormous Butts" now

    ?
  • “I'm surprised. Those clothes… but, aren't you…?”
    THERE WAS NO NAME CHANGE, AU.

    THERE WAS NEVER A NAME CHANGE.

    CHECK YOUR WINDOWS, AU. MAKE SURE THAT YOU STILL HAVE WINDOWS.
  • I've learned to tolerate drama...except on the boat
    yeah i was just hallucinating
  • You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
    lol
  • imagei will watch the heck outta this pumpkin patch
    *waves*
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