Paradox 4X Thread [Crusader Kings 2, Europa Universalis 4, etc.]

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  • image Wee yea erra chs hymmnos mea.
    If you're their ruler, you get a 5+ "Dare Not Refuse" bonus.
  • Probably the best name for a bonus.

    I've had it not work, (as in, the thing will come up "No"), but only rarely.

  • image Wee yea erra chs hymmnos mea.
    If they refuse to stop the plot, you can imprison them on charges of trying to murder somebody.
  • Theoretically. I don't like doing that because of the whole "they might escape and revolt" thing.

    Half the time I don't even care about the plot in question anyway.

  • I've been doing a lot of empire-building lately. Anyone got suggestions for something smaller-scale to mix it up a bit? Starting as somebody's vassal or something. Old Gods or otherwise.

    I'm taking a break from my Scandanavia playthrough. Eirikr's successor Eirikr Freysen has gotten himself into a sticky situation and, while it's winnable, actually getting out of it will be difficult.

  • alright so

    "Da Plan"

    we're gonna start out as a Duke in one of the three major Christian kingdoms (either East Francia, Lotharingia, or West Francia) and just see how high we can climb the latter over the generations. First goal will be to obtain a king-level title. After that, we'll see what happens.

  • so for my first vassalized Duke-level playthrough, I've decided to start as some of my own ancestors.

    image

    I can't genuinely be sure if we're related to the people who were the Dukes of Flanders in the 800s (the van Vlaanderen family, evidently), but given my family's love of discussing our long history in the low coutnries, it wouldn't shock me too much (I would've played as Holland, but they seem to be a Norse Petty Kingdom around this time).

    But enough prattling about myself.

    We're in West Francia, are the son-in-law of the West Francian King (and the brother-in-law of the King of Aquitaine, who will inherit West Francia, presumably uniting the crowns under a personal union), and the Duke of Flanders, as I said. This means two things

    1. since the King of West Francia is stupidly powerful, any grabs at power we want to make on any scale above the ducal are going to have to be as subtle as a dagger in a cloak.
    2. we're coastal. This means much of our early game is going to be spent dealing with Viking raiders.

    In any case, our first move was to grab up the larger of the two counties we have de jure claims on. That was Boulogne, to our west.

    image

    we've spent quite awhile fighting off vikings, and currently I've got my chancellor in Eu trying to fabricate a claim. I want to get some more muscle behind us before we try taking on the Petty Kingdom of Holland. Our first goal here is to get enough territory to feasibly create the Kingdom of Frisia, even though we'll likely not do it right away.


  • things got interesting quickly.

    long story short, when the King of Aquitaine died, his brother, the King of West Francia, inherited the throne. Uniting the countries.

    A lot of people, nobles namely, seem to have just fucking hated that fact. And within minutes there was a 200%-ish faction advocating that the throne go to King Carloman II of Burgundy. So if you're following, that's King Carloman of Burgundy versus our liege, King Louis II "The Stammerer" of West Francia & Aquitaine.

    Now, if were a good and loyal noble, we might support our king in his time of need.

    We are not a good and loyal noble.

    Not only did we join the faction backing Carloman of Burgundy, after one of the smaller backers left, we ended up leading it.

    image

    before long, the membership percentages bloomed to ridiculous numbers.

    image

    we presented our ultimatum to King Louis, who rejected it (I don't think the computer ever accepts ultimatums, but I may be wrong) and before long the entirety of Western Francia and Aquitaine were ripped to shreds by civil war.

    image

    As you can see, King Louis only controlled a small portion of West Francia by the time everyone was done revolting against him. Suffice it to say, he lost handidly, and we used our newfound BFF status with the King of Burgundy to arrange a marriage with one of our daughters and his oldest son. I am hoping that this will give us a powerful ally both now and down the line, if not just give us a straight shot at the Kingship.

    Our liege, meanwhile, (still the King of West Francia mind, he only lost one of his crowns) died of illness, and his successor almost immediately died of a suspicious accident. So the current King of West Francia? Carloman II. A completely different Carloman II.

  • edit: really vanilla? You're gonna eat the entire fucking six paragraph summary I wrote up? That's just dick.

    short version: wife was Queen of West Francia, no longer is. But our son is the King-consort of Lotharingia, so all is not lost.

  • man that just sucked so much ass.

    I think I'm gonna revisit the Carpathian Empire now. See if I can't somehow salvage that particular clusterfuck.

  • sometimes games just fuck you

    2 revolts, a peasant uprising, a heretic uprising, and an invasion from the Khanate of Cumania.

    what even can you do about that.

  • ...And even when your hope is gone
    move along, move along, just to make it through
    (2015 self)
    I want this game.
  • if you have $39.95 and Steam, you can get it.
  • ...And even when your hope is gone
    move along, move along, just to make it through
    (2015 self)
    Man, do I look like I'm made of money.

    That's two pictures of Andrew Jackson getting wing-punched in the face by an eagle that's sticking an olive branch in his ear; and I only get one of those from each grandmother on two days in the year:  Christmas and April 11.

    So, that's half of my annual income right there.
  • managed to turn the Dukes of Saxony into the Kings of Norway. A more thorough review will be upcoming.
  • apparently the game does not account for ethnic Africans becoming Norse landowners, and as such, the headbands just kinda float off of their heads.
  • Remember back in the 50s when they'd record like Elvis singing YOU AIN'T NOTHIN BUT A HOUND DOG and then they'd turn the record over and reverse it and it was all NYERP NYERP NYERP NYERP NYERP and people were all like, "That is actually the voice of Satan coming from that song."
    Pfft haha

    Though you've got me curious as to how the North Africans became Norse landowners in the first place.
  • READ MY CROSS SHIPPING-FANFICTION, DAMMIT!

    i get so angry sometimes i just punch plankton --Klinotaxis
    Heh. Apparently the Africans are magical Norse shamans,
  • Pfft haha


    Though you've got me curious as to how the North Africans became Norse landowners in the first place.



    when a nation is destroyed (that is, the land is usurped and the title is either dissolved or changed) sometimes the courtiers will flee to other countries.

    It doesn't happen that often and when it does it's usually countries quite close by, but when Songhai or Mali get destroyed and the other doesn't exist, they'll often flee to Norse countries.

    alternately, the player may simply have married off a courtier to a courtier in one of the African kingdoms, and several generations later, this is the result.

    Justice42 said:

    Heh. Apparently the Africans are magical Norse shamans,

    other than the floating headband, all Norse jarls are supposed to look like that (it's the "Duke-level" graphic). So it's right, it's just bugged.
  • Finished up an interesting game as the Billung dynasty.

    Began as a duke of Saxony, dude named Ordulf Billung. Married the Queen of Norway which gave my son Magnus the inheritance on the throne. When Orzzie passed on, Magnus murdered his own mother and became King of Norway (Magnus II, as there'd been a King Magnus in Norway prior). He made some territorial gains in Finland and a few more minor ones in England before he passed on. He slipped into a coma toward the end of his life and had to be appointed a regent. Was known as "The Monk", presumably due to being the scholarly, religious type as well as for alliterative reasons.

    Magnus' heir was Knud (also "II", presumably Canute to his English subjects). Knud was by far the greatest ruler I played as during this playthrough, and probably the greatest king this timeline's Norway ever had (except perhaps Armund, but see below). He made huge territorial gains in England, Pomerania, Finland, and most notably, when called upon to crusade, Jerusalem. He also managed to hold on to the family enclaves in The Holy Roman Empire, despite said Empire's continued expansion outward. Knud acquired the nickname "The Blessed" for his conquest of Jerusalem. Finally, he united the crowns of Sweden and Norway, although he was unable to navigate the country's complex electoral monarchy to nominate his own son as the heir apparent in Sweden.

    Knud's heir is where things began to fall apart. Haraldr IV of Norway was known as "the Drunkard", and true to his name was a well-known boozer with anger management problems and fear of anything pointy. He was also a womanizer, fathering an impressive 10 children under his wife, and two bastards (Erik Haraldrsson and his sister Gunhilde) under his mistress. Haraldr immediately seceded some of the more tenuously-held territory in the Kingdom upon his ascention. Namely, he gave the Kingdom of Jerusalem to his brother, where it was reconquered by the Fatimid Caliphate two years later. Haraldr spent the majority of his (shockingly long, he lived until he was almost 80) reign putting down rebellions and attempting to reunite Sweden. He succeeded on several occaisons only to have further uprisings take the crown back. During the years of Haraldr's reign, there were no fewer than a dozen monarchs of Sweden, and Haraldr himself held the crown three separate times.

    He also butted heads with the Catholic church several times despite being a devout Catholic himself. When his favored candidate for the Papacy lost to the German Boniface VIII, Haraldr declared the Roman Pope a heretic and established his own Papacy in Mecklenberg, which he granted to the Archbishop (the candidate Haraldr had favored), who took the name Pius II. The Nordic Antipapacy would last through two more popes, ending under Honorious II. Notably, Pius' rival Boniface was the only Pope to ever gain the nickname "The Ill-Ruler".

    If Haraldr was bad, his heir Halkjell Haraldrsson was far worse. Unlike Knud and Haraldr, Halkjell had spent almost his entire life in the Holy Roman Empire, serving under the Emperor, and considered himself thoroughly German. In addition to being quite old (61) when he ascended the throne, Halkjell was a distant ruler, both emotionally and in relation to the fact that he ruled Norway from his estate in southern Iceland. Eventually, Halkjell was deposed and his half-brother Griswald was briefly installed as King of Norway, before he was assassinated, causing the title to fall to his son Armund Griswaldez, then the King of Castille. 

    Halkjell was exiled in his estate and forbidden to leave it, and he died heirless. His only child (Haraldr Halkjellsson) having died in prison after attempting to revolt against the Holy Roman Emperor. Despite his situation, all reports indicate that Halkjell was entirely fine with his situation. His estate was well-stocked with his favorite wines, and before he died, Halkjell inherited his father's nickname of "The Drunkard". 

    The Brulling Dynasty survived in the ruling houses of nations as distant as Cumania (Haraldr's half-sister was married to Khozel Khan), but mainly in the royal lines of Sweden and Castille.

    -----------------------------

    Magnus the Monk late in his reign, shortly before becoming incapable of ruling and succumbing to the illness that plagued him.

    A young King Knud II

    the greatest extent of Norweigan European holdings under King Knud the Blessed

    the Norweigan Kingdom of Jerusalem. Ruled in title by Knud, and in stead by the lowborn Finn, Duke of Jerusalem.

    Norweigan holdings near the end of the reign of King Haraldr the Drunkard

    Antipope Pius II, Pope in Gevezin. Also known as The Nordic Pope.

    Norweigan holdings at the beginning of the short reign of King Halkjell

    Norway under King Griswald

    last remaining family holding of the main line of the Brulling dynasty.

    Norway under Castillian rule under King Armund of Castille, Norway, & Galicia, shortly before Halkjell's death.

    Chronicle screen. Ironically, the highest house we beat was a Swedish one.

  • READ MY CROSS SHIPPING-FANFICTION, DAMMIT!

    i get so angry sometimes i just punch plankton --Klinotaxis
    So do you take notes when you do these? The way you write is mildly amazing with the amount of detail you have.

    It's like reading a Wikipedia article except the editor is allowed to share his own thoughts and insights. 
  • Justice42 said:

    So do you take notes when you do these? The way you write is mildly amazing with the amount of detail you have.


    It's like reading a Wikipedia article except the editor is allowed to share his own thoughts and insights. 



    I just tend to take screenshots and reconstruct the histories from memory afterward. A lot of the personal details about the rulers are from stuff that can be inferred from what they did or what traits they had on the character screen. We know Haraldr IV was a dirty old man because he had 12 children, many of them after he was 60.

    I've grown fond of installing antipopes. My new game as Bavaria is one to see how long I can keep a continuous antipapacy going.

    I've also installed my first mod, it just adds more nicknames though, nothing major.

  • image

    yeah that's just me casually wrecking the Cumanian Khanate.

  • READ MY CROSS SHIPPING-FANFICTION, DAMMIT!

    i get so angry sometimes i just punch plankton --Klinotaxis
    Was your mod what added names like "The Holy" and "The Drunkard"? 

    I'm enjoying the little extra flare from more of your characters having titles.
  • image Wee yea erra chs hymmnos mea.
    The Holy is the title given for becoming a Paragon of Virtue.
  • Justice42 said:

    Was your mod what added names like "The Holy" and "The Drunkard"? 


    I'm enjoying the little extra flare from more of your characters having titles.



    no, "Holy" and "Drunkard" are both vanilla nicks. "The Drunkard" is just what you get if you have "Drinker" trait and don't get any other nicks after a certain amount of time. There's also a duke (unrelated to what I'm doing in any way) in my current game who got the difficult-to-get "Priest-Hater" nick.

    I think I actually installed the mod wrong since it doesn't seem to be working. However, the last three rulers in this particular game (which I will give the standard AAP of at some point) have been "The Bold" (which is hardcoded, you don't have to earn that title, he starts out with it), "The Lionheart", and "The Great", respectively.

    As for why it's the most recent one that's called The Great instead of his grandfather The Lionheart when the latter beat back the Khanate invasions, well

    image

    image

  • also out of curiosity I was poking around the Realm Histories for various titles in-game, and if you go back to the foundation of the Sunni Caliphate you can see Muhammad, but his portrait is blocked out. It's replaced with an Arabic calligraph, though I don't know what it means offhand.
  • It is.

    It bothers me somewhat that St. Peter is listed as "Peter I". No respectable pontiff would ever call themselves Peter II, but this is a quirk of the game's name engine.

  • Isn't there a school of thought that Peter II will be the last Pope or something?
  • A certain sect of catholic mysticism believes in a few alleged prophecies given by an apparition of the virgin mother to some children in Spain. Said prophecies imply (though they don't outright state) that someone named Peter the Roman would be the last Pope.

    That said, that legend is only about 100 years old. The main reason no one in the western papacy (the eastern patriarchies are a different story. I'm pretty sure there have been at least three Peters of Constantinople) would call themselves Peter is just because it's seen as disrespectful. There's even a part of the Papal Coronation (or whatever you'd like to call it nowadays) where the Pope is reminded that his reign will never match Peter's.

  • --on The Wendish Empire--

    Our breakoff point here was as King Boleslaw II ("Boleslaus" in Polish, known variously as The Generous, Bold, and Cruel. The game gives him the second nickname) of Poland. Boleslaw started expanding early on, which was easy for him to do since much of the territory near Poland was pagan at the time (specifically, of the Old Slavic faith). However, in one of many battles he'd take part in in the region, Boleslaw received a heavy blow to the head.

    This development had few short term consequences (Boleslaw was back on his feet within mere months), but over time, it contributed to the King's worsening mental health. He got the idea in his head that all the western slavs (The "Wendish") should be united under one rule, specifically, his own. He went on a decade-long conquering spree, subjugating much the land held by various Western Slavic tribes, and eventually declared himself King of Lithuania (more specifically, "King of all Lithuanians", but the titles are functionally equivalent) in addition to his title as King of Poland. He also sent repeated requests to recieve an Imperial title to the Pope, but it was not until the final year of his life, after slipping into a coma (and being regented for by the corrupt Chancellor Jan of Kujawy) that his request was finally granted. The now Emperor Boleslaw was succeeded by his son Mieszko a few weeks later, who also ruled with Jan as regent for two years before being old enough to rule without assistance.

    Mieszko was furious with Jan of Kujawy for his mismanagement of the last years of his father's reign, and the early years of his own, and had him thrown in prison on a host of charges. Mieszko (not yet Emperor) then sent a letter to Pope Alexander asking for both his father's crown and title and for Jan of Kujawy's excommunication from the Catholic church.

    To Mieszko's shock, the Pope refused to provide either of these things, on the grounds that the title was Boleslaw's alone, and that Jan of Kujawy's misdeeds could not be proven. Mieszko responded by entirely severing all official ties between the Wendish government and the Catholic Church. He declared Alexander a thief and heretic, and installed the Archbishop of Sacz as an antipope. The Wendish See, as it was called, would continue uninterrupted throughout Mieszko's reign, cycling through four different Wendish Popes.

    Mieszko is probably best known not for his territorial gains (which were substantial), but for his repulsion of the encroachment of the Cuman Caliphate. The Cumans had been spreading westward at an alarmingly quick pace over the last two decades, and it was Mieszko--as well as foreign assistance received from as far afield as France, not to mention the newly-formed Knights Templar--who was able to halt their expansion into Western Europe. The Wendish Empire would serve as a buffer state between Cumania and the rest of Europe for much of its existence, and it is this reason primarily that it was allowed to continue practicing its splinter group of the Catholic faith. For his bravery in battle, Mieszko was sometimes nicknamed "The Lionheart" by contemporaries, though the nickname is more commonly applied by historians. 

    Mieszko also started a family tradition of ruthless intrigue. He hired killers to end the lives of a number of the Cuman Caliphs, and this is one of the reasons that he was able to keep the Cumans at bay as easily as he did, since there was often a great deal of internal disarray within the Caliphate itself. Furthermore, within his own realm he was not averse to having the Wendish Pope excommunicate troublesome nobles, so he could imprison them without consequence or trial.

    Mieszko died in his late 60s, from an infected wound he'd received while repelling yet another Cuman incursion.

    Mieszko's reign was long enough that by the time he died, so had his only legitimate heir (his son Boleslaw). Thus, the emperorship fell to his grandson, Gniewosz. 

    After a few years being pulled about by various regents, Gniewosz ascended the throne on his own at age 16. He promptly made a strategic marriage proposal to the young Queen of Navarra after the death of his first "wife" before the two had even met in person. 

    Gniewosz was both an intelligent man and a very, very brazen one. He was faced with challenges to his rule early on, and like his father often used the Wendish Pope to excommunicate malcontents so he could imprison them without trial. When various nobles began challenging the Wendish Papacy's authority, the solution was clear to Gniewosz.

    Gniewosz had inherited parts of the Island of Sicily from his mother, who was the island's Duchess. He used this as a powerbase to first take over the remainder of the Sicily, and then, finally, launch an attack on the walls of Rome itself. After a year-long siege, the Pope was deposed, and the Wendish Pope--Sabinian II--was installed as the true Pontiff, answering only to God in name, and the Emperor in practice. With this installation the Wendish Schism officially ended, though not in the way one assumes the deposed Pope Martinian would've hoped.

    Gniewosz' reign was marked by further territorial gains (many of formerly claimed lands by the Cumans, though Gniewosz also notably took over Wallachia), as well as the rapid assassination (on his orders) of three subsequent popes. Gniewosz was not satisfied with Sabinian's successors, and after they'd been replaced with Clement V (a Pontiff Gniewosz found acceptable), he quite willingly confessed his sins to the new Pope.

    He also participated in both failed Crusades for Jerusalem, and considered his failure to capture the Holy Land one of the biggest stains on his honor, and engaged in a number of personal Holy Wars with the Cuman Caliph Girgen, who Gniewosz considered his greatest enemy.

    Gniewosz had the longest reign of any Wendish emperor, reigning from the time he was 14 until his death at age 85 from heart failure.

    [continued in next post]

  • Gniewosz was succeeded by his youngest son (the only valid heir, his others had either died or entered the priesthood), Mieszko II. Mieszko was already in his 50s when called to take the reigns of the empire, and had already been the King of Navarra for nearly a decade following the death of his mother. Mieszko was an unpopular and largely unremarkable ruler (notable mostly for bringing Navarra into the empire), disliked by his Wendish subjects for being seen as a foreigner, and disliked by the Basque in Navarra for abandoning them. Mieszko ruled a scant three years, and accomplished little of note. In the last month of his reign, the Ilkhanate Mongols arrived from the east. Mieszko is said to have died of a heart attack upon seeing the horse archers barreling down upon the empire's easternmost holdings.

    Mieszko's son--also named Mieszko--took the throne after spending much of his life in Croatia with his mother. He considered himself a Croat by culture, but was more than willing to defend the empire against the oncoming Mongol hordes. Mieszko enlisted foreign aid from all across Europe, but with the combined might of the Cumans and Mongols bearing down upon the empire, some territory was bound to be lost. Still, Mieszko was able to work out a peace treaty containing favorable clauses toward the Wends.

    A few years later, he began expanding northward into Finland.

    (to be continued. Maybe)

    --------------------------


    King Boleslaw II of Poland

    Kingdom of Poland at start date

    Kingdom of Poland near the end of Boleslaw's reign. Under a personal union with the Kingdom of Lithuania.

    The Wendish Empire upon Boleslaw's ceremonial coronation as Emperor.

    --

    The Wendish Empire upon Mieszko's ascension to the throne.

    Wendish Antipope Clement IV, Archbishop of the See of Szczyrzyc

    Emperor Mieszko later in his reign.

    the assassination of Cuman Caliph Bachman.

    The Wendish Empire near the end of Mieszko I's reign.

    --

    The Wendish Empire upon the ascention of Gniewosz

    Gniewosz Piast, Wendish Emperor

    Wendish holdings in Sicily early in Gniewosz' reign.

    the Siege of Rome

    The Papal States under Wendish rule

    Pope Sabinian II

    the assassination of Anicetus II, Sabinian's immediate successor

    main body of the Wendish Empire near the end of Gniewosz' reign.

    additional Wendish holdings in Italy.

    Cuman Caliph Girgen Pertomid, Gniewosz' chief rival.

    --

    Navarra under Wendish rule during the reign of Mieszko II

    --

    Wendish Empire under Mieszko III, after the Ilkhanate invasions.

    Wendish Empire after northward expansion.

  • basically I need a break since I've been playing this massive-scale game for a few days now. I might try something small, like Wales.
  • abridged version because I lack the cognitive ability for historie right now.

    • we got invaded by the Golden Horde and lost our Wallachian holdings.
    • we repelled a Jihad on Sicily.
    • Mieszko III died after getting maimed in an attack by some assassins. 
    • Mieszko IV is now the emperor, and he is 12.
  • >convert to Islam

    >game ends

    they really don't want you playing a Muslim without buying the DLC do they

  • image Wee yea erra chs hymmnos mea.
    That was how it worked even before the DLC came out. There's no systems in place for it, so it has to end the game.
  • READ MY CROSS SHIPPING-FANFICTION, DAMMIT!

    i get so angry sometimes i just punch plankton --Klinotaxis
    I kind of surprised they'd even include the mechanic outside of the DLC.
  • image Wee yea erra chs hymmnos mea.
    Yarrun said:

    Well, that's just poor planning

    Paradox are kinda infamous for that, although as far as their stuff goes, CKII was relatively non-buggy at release. Emphasis on the relatively.
  • I don't mind paying money for decent DLC, it's the "pay $1 to get people who are actually black in Africa" bullshit that irritates me.
  • ...And even when your hope is gone
    move along, move along, just to make it through
    (2015 self)
    I'm gonna buy this game this weekend when it is half-off.
  • Northernlion said it might go as low as 75% as the weekend goes on, so I would potentially wait until the last day of the sale.

    He said he didn't have insider info but I kinda don't believe him.

  • Not a hybrid rabbit-skink spirit
    Ahahahahahahahaaaaaaa


    I knew that if I waited the price would drop
  • I am gon b' streaming this tonight if any of you are interested but don't check the Livestream thread. Start thinking up dynasty suggestions now if you're interested.
  • Remember back in the 50s when they'd record like Elvis singing YOU AIN'T NOTHIN BUT A HOUND DOG and then they'd turn the record over and reverse it and it was all NYERP NYERP NYERP NYERP NYERP and people were all like, "That is actually the voice of Satan coming from that song."
    Huh, I wasn't expecting it to be on sale for this much so soon. I was thinking that I'd have to wait until next April or something.
  • the game itself isn't new. The Old Gods DLC is.
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