You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
Amazon.com and the Insufferable Jackass in: Train Trouble!
It was still a rainy Tuesday afternoon as Amazon.com, The Insufferable Jackass, and The Conductor stood idly around the Cedar Fair gift shop waiting for the rain to let up. They all used the restrooms, and they looked at all the stupid junk, and I think The Insufferable Jackass ate a candy bar without paying, but it's okay because Amazon.com paid for it afterwards. What a nice girl, that Amazon.com.
After what felt like ages, the rain begain to let up. By now it was no longer a late Tuesday afternoon, but an early Tuesday evening.
"Looks like it's finally stopped raining," said Amazon.com, looking through the front door of the shop.
"It'll be dark soon, too," said The Conductor. "We should probably get out of here. But where will we go?"
"Hmm..." said Amazon.com. "Well, we're at an amusement park, right? So I'm sure there are some hotels nearby. Why don't we stay in one of those for the night, and then get everything sorted out in the morning?"
"There's just one teeeeeny problem," chimed The Insufferable Jackass. "Look at us. We're still in these soaking wet, muddy clothes. Who the hell will rent us a room when we look like this?"
"You're right," said Amazon.com. She leaned on a rack of clean, dry clothes for sale. "But where are we going to get clean, dry clothes?"
So they wasted a bit of time with that, then came to the obvious solution. After popping into the shop's restrooms for a minute to get changed, they stepped out of the building onto the wet pavement. The torrential rains had done little to mitigate the summer heat, and they had a miserable walk before them as they headed out the park exit.
Once out of the park gates, they rested on a bench. Before them was the now-nearly-empty parking lot, a sea of asphalt as far as they could see.
"Dear God," said The Insufferable Jackass. "We have to walk all through this parking lot, which is probably at least twice the size of Rhode Island, to try to find hotels we don't even know exist? You might as well kill me now."
"That can be arranged," grumbled The Conductor.
"Knock it off, you two," said Amazon.com. She motioned to a security guard who was driving by in a Cedar Fair pickup truck.
"Is something wrong, ma'am?" asked the guard?
"Look, I know this is an unusual request, but...I'll give you free shipping on your next three orders if you give us a ride to the nearest hotel."
Now, as I'm sure you're all aware, no man can resist the allure of free shipping from such a fine woman as Amazon.com. He motioned for the three of them to climb into the bed of his truck, then he took them up and out of the parking lot and across the main highway, where he dropped them off at a hotel.
"Thank you!" Amazon.com said as the trio climbed out of the truck. She waved as the park guard drove off into the sunset.
They turned and looked at the building. A large sign above the entrance read HOTEL CALIFORNIA.
"Look, Amazon.com..." said The Insufferable Jackass. "I know the guard meant well and all, but...I have a bad feeling about this place."
"Beggars can't be choosers, Jackie," she replied. "And look, the sign even says 'you can check out any time you like'! This hotel is going to be just fine..."
You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
The Sandman's coming in his train of cars, with moonbeam windows and with wheels of stars. So hush you little ones and have no fear, the man in the moon, he is the engineer.
You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
*forces the next poster to use dial-up, laughs sadistically*
You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
[generic expression of gender-related angst, obviously intended to elicit sympathy]
You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
Sometimes I feel like I'm deluding myself by telling myself it's okay to think of myself as a woman.
Because even though I'm openly transgendered on the internet and I'm comfortable with that, real life isn't quite so forgiving. And I have it in my head that since people in real life would still consider me a freak for being transgendered and real life > internet, that means I really am a freak and I'm merely trying to seek comfort on the internet by seeking out people who are open-minded about my identity.
...Or something. I'm not even sure what i just typed
On the Internet or off it, there are people who think all sorts of horrible things. You don't need to give such people any acknowledgement if that's how they choose to behave.
There are many people in real life who don't or won't consider you a freak. Those that do are not worth bothering with.
You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
I suppose I have it kinda lucky in that I live in a hugely LGBT-friendly city in the middle of an otherwise conservative-leaning state, honestly.
I keep thinking that when I move out on my own, I should look for some of the bigger "gay" neighborhoods around here. I have it in my head that my dream house would be a pretty old house in German Village, which is funny because I liked that neighborhood even before I identified as queer.
You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
It's weird, the typical "American dream" says that I should aspire to a 9-5 job and a new house in the suburbs and kids and all that, but I don't want that and I never really think I do. I aspire to live as a woman in a hundred-year-old house in a queer neighborhood with my boyfriend.
But somehow I don't feel like I'm "special" enough to aspire to something other than what society says I should aspire to. I don't feel like I "deserve" to be deviant, because if I'm deviant it just means I'm trying to make myself special.
Comments
my fortress may just basically be a hole in the side of a mountain
but it hasn't been attacked by goblins so far
so that's a plus
Assassin poems, Poems that shoot
guns. Poems that wrestle cops into alleys
and take their weapons leaving them dead
You put herpes in the mail and put your address on the "to be sent" part instead of the "to be returned to" part
Eating food in a buffet!
That made me happy!
:3
^ WHY
Assassin poems, Poems that shoot
guns. Poems that wrestle cops into alleys
and take their weapons leaving them dead
Jou'll feel better after a good night's slseep.
There are many people in real life who don't or won't consider you a freak. Those that do are not worth bothering with.