How to bathe your pet eagle

1. Patiently and lovingly strip your eagle of every single feather on its feathery disguting body

2. Sing a calming lullaby to soothe the bird's undoubtedly frayed nerves

3. Tell it that it's a beautiful bird and that what you're going to do hurts you more than it hurts them

4. Snap the bird's neck (for easier storage)

5. Toss it in the dishwasher, turn on and wait until finished

6. Leave it on the clothesline to dry

7. Buy Laura a new pet eagle before she gets home from work

Thank you for watching another episode of "Exotic Pet Tips & Trixx", please tune in next week when I teach you how to potty train your snorlax, don't forget to like, comment & share, and see ya in the next one! Stay hairy folks!


  • nasty prisms good sir
    I know someone who may not appreciate this
  • “And above all, watch with glittering eyes the whole world around you because the greatest secrets are always hidden in the most unlikely places. Those who don't believe in magic will never find it.” – Roald Dahl
    Let's not.
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