Remember back in the 50s when they'd record like Elvis singing YOU AIN'T NOTHIN BUT A HOUND DOG and then they'd turn the record over and reverse it and it was all NYERP NYERP NYERP NYERP NYERP and people were all like, "That is actually the voice of Satan coming from that song."
Colonel Mustard, in the library, with the lead pipe
You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
@last page: I like both mayo and mustard, depending on the sandwich, but I like mayo more.
Ketchup...doesn't belong on sandwiches. Fries only.
You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
Remember back in the 50s when they'd record like Elvis singing YOU AIN'T NOTHIN BUT A HOUND DOG and then they'd turn the record over and reverse it and it was all NYERP NYERP NYERP NYERP NYERP and people were all like, "That is actually the voice of Satan coming from that song."
I never really liked ketchup all that much. I only really eat it on fast-food burgers that have it by default. I don't notice the ketchup taste then.
I like buffalo sauce with chicken fingers sometimes. And I haven't used ranch dressing as a condiment in a while either. I remember that going really well with fries.
Bwahaha, I'm reading this PC Magazine from 20 years ago, and there's a "Don't copy that floppy" print ad in it.
BRB DYING LAUGHING
Also...1992 was a weird world. Unix was an arcane curiosity, everyone was waiting with bated breath for Windows NT (Windows 95 hadn't even been announced yet) and OS/2 2.0 was considered a joke. The Internet? What's that?
Oh yeah, and the Quantum LPS240AT was considered a hot IDE drive then. This thing held all of 240 megabytes (yeah, megabytes) and could pull down, oh, about 6 MB/s sustained on the outer tracks -- a decent number considering ISA itself was good for about 3.3. Modern drives can easily break 100 MB/s.
You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
Did anyone even really use early versions of Windows NT? I remember seeing NT 4.0 at school a couple times, but this was well after 95 came out and NT 4.0's interface was more or less a carbon copy of 95's...
I refuse to eat mayo because (A) it's fattening, and I don't want that and (B) if I never try it, I don't know what I'm missing, so I'll never want to put it on stuff.
Remember back in the 50s when they'd record like Elvis singing YOU AIN'T NOTHIN BUT A HOUND DOG and then they'd turn the record over and reverse it and it was all NYERP NYERP NYERP NYERP NYERP and people were all like, "That is actually the voice of Satan coming from that song."
There are exactly four kinds of sandwiches that I usually eat: burgers, PB&J, chicken (usually from Chick-fil-A and Wendy's), and tuna. I haven't had a grilled cheese sandwich in a while. Perhaps I should.
CA: Nope. NT was pretty much a curiosity for developers and sysadmins until Windows 2000 came out.
Man, this is so weird. Back in 1992, when you said "file server" you meant "NetWare". No one, and I mean no one who was running DOS ran anything else, aside from the few brave souls running LANtastic or TOPS.
Doctor Who reference in Pokemon B2W2? Headcanon accepted.
1992 was a time when operating systems were argued like beer, that is people thought (and many still do) believe that such preference in a brand expanded upon or was a detriment to penis size
Heheheheh. Back then, the different camps didn't even talk to each other, at least if you believed their respective magazines. PC Magazine lived in a world where other systems...well, if you couldn't run 1-2-3 or XyWrite on them (or, later on, anything Windows-related), you could safely ignore them. There's very little discussion of contemporary systems like the Mac or the Amiga, even though Apple was a frequent advertiser. MacUser, at least, was willing to talk about the competition.
Indeed. There are still people bitching about how Amiga is God and how Commodore shouldn't have been a bunch of fuckups 20 years after the fact! A lot has happened since then, guys...
You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
Let's make a Heapers' Hangout-themed operating system!
Doctor Who reference in Pokemon B2W2? Headcanon accepted.
Well, that bouncing ball demo got a lot of mileage with those folks. What's funny is when you tell them that they got that demo running on an Atari 2600 and even funnier when you show them the youtube video of it
But then they'd just say "But the 2600 was the Amiga's granddaddy, so it's no wonder" or some other factually-true-but-completely-missing-the-point BS. Because they're dumb. :(
You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
(I’m a cashier at a newly opened gas station. It is the first of its chain in the area. As such, many of the customers are asking questions about the store. Since we’re new, I’m trying my best to be extra friendly and helpful to everyone. An old woman approaches me with several items. She looks rather concerned.)
Customer: “So…are you a gas station or a grocery store?”
Me: “Both, ma’am. We’re all about convenience.”
Customer: “And what sorts of customers come here?”
Me: “Well, we’ve just opened, ma’am, so its hard to say at this point.”
Customer: “I don’t want to shop at a store for God-hating homosexuals.”
Me: “Come again?”
Customer: “You heard me!”
(I do my best to maintain a neutral stance and begin scanning her items as quickly as possible.)
Me: “Ma’am, by policy we can’t turn away customers.”
(She gives me a strange look and her eyes widen.)
Customer: “You’re one of them aren’t you!?”
Me: “Pardon?”
Customer: “You’re a f*****!”
Me: “I’m not, actually, but it is my job to serve any customer that comes to my register.”
Customer: “I will never come here again! May God have mercy on your sinful soul!”
(I stand there for a few moments absolutely dumbstruck. Meanwhile, two older gentlemen in matching lavender shirts come up to my register and drop a $50 bill in my tip jar while only purchasing a single gallon of milk. One of them grins and looks me in the eye.)
Older gentleman: “Doesn’t matter if you’re on ‘our team’ or not. We’re coming here every day from now on.”
You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
(I work at a gay male bar as a bouncer. I normally escort or throw out guys due to inappropriate behavior. One day, however, the manager calls me over to throw out a woman. Afterwards, I ask the manager what happened.)
Me: “What was that about?”
Manager: “She kept on insisting to meet me to implement a suggestion for the bar.”
Me: “Oh…so why did you have me kick her out?”
Manager: “She was insistent, and got more and more agitated when I told her we’d never do that.”
Me: “And what was her suggestion?”
Manager: “She said we should have Ladies Night so that more men would come here.”
Comments
This is Strider-level irony.
Creating the world was the setup, actually
what really got the laugh track going was when they demanded God to be allowed a king and he gave them Saul
I don't really eat sandwiches very often. They tend to be rather plain, usually only having meat and maybe cheese on them.
They always used to have a page in the back that was just jokes.
I'm kinda like Anonus with the sandwiches, except I have them daily.
I like jam sandwiches. Those are nice.
Not because Amigas were bad, they actually smart little computers for what they were
but when it came to pure, shrill annoyance, their userbase was the absolute worst
Well, that bouncing ball demo got a lot of mileage with those folks. What's funny is when you tell them that they got that demo running on an Atari 2600 and even funnier when you show them the youtube video of it
Good night Heap, wherever you are