The Trash Heap of the Heapers' Hangout

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  •     “Do you require something of me?” I said, and I felt her heart skip. Suddenly her resolve was restored.

        “Yes,” she said, staring at me intensely. “I require a weapon.”

    I
    allowed a long pause before I spoke once more, still working on the
    piece of metal before me and only occasionally allowing myself to meet
    eyes with her.

        “A weapon,” I said, plainly. “You want a weapon.”

    She continued to stare at me and gave a slight, grave nod.

        “I have never made one before.” I said. “I do not want to.”

        She furrowed her brow and took on an angry expression.

    “My family was slaughtered by an invading army,” she said. “I intend to avenge them, but to join the regiment I need a weapon.”

        “A noble goal, surely.” I said. “I will think about it.”  She did not break her gaze, and I sighed. “Come to me tomorrow.”

    She closed her eyes and rubbed her forehead, and left the smithy without a word. I continued my work as I always did.

    She
    came the next morning, as I asked. I did not speak, but laid a note on
    the counter for her. I had instructed her to gather the necessary
    materials- wood from the forests outside the village, water from the
    river, iron ore from the rocks nearby, and whatever fuel she could find.
    I told her to spend an entire day gathering each material, and to take
    at least four times as much as she thought she would need to forge her
    weapon.

    Every
    morning after she took the note, I awoke to a hefty pile of whatever
    material she had gathered. When she came to me after bringing the last
    of it, I gave her further instruction.

    “Set aside one fourth of each material. That will be yours. Take what remains, and give it to the village.”

    She
    protested that her own hard work would serve those other than herself,
    but eventually did as I asked. She spent the next two days giving wood,
    water, ore, and fuel to whoever in the village needed it, and came to me
    after that period was over.

    “I
    have made all necessary preparations to begin your weapon,” I said.
    “But first, you must plant trees in the place of the ones you have
    felled and help us dig out a new well.”

    “That
    will take me at least two weeks!” she cried out, but I assured her that
    these tasks were necessary, or I would not lend her my aid. She
    reluctantly agreed to do what I had asked.

    She
    came back to me two weeks later and asked if we could commence with
    creating her weapon. I set down my hammer and tongs and sat with her.

    “I have one more brief task, but I must ask: Where have you been staying all this time?”

    “Well,”
    she said, with a slight smile. “At first I slept among the tree roots,
    but when I helped dig the well, the matriarch let me stay with her.”

    “Ah,” I said, “You are quite fond of her, then?” The girl nodded.

    “One
    more question as well: What did you feel, as you planted the saplings
    in the forest?” I asked. The girl thought for a moment, and then spoke.

    “I do not know what you mean.”

    “That is fine. Here is my final task, then.”


    I handed her a vial and instructed her to head out to a field seven
    miles north of the village, where a battle between the army that had
    killed her family and the regiment she intended to join had taken place
    recently. I told her to gather a portion of human blood. She looked at
    me, mortified, but I said nothing more and she set off.


    I had worked quickly to complete the weapon by the time she returned.
    The weapon took shape, and though I applied as much finesse to it as I
    would any other piece, it came out twisted and misshapen. It took me a
    day to make, and never before had I felt so exhausted by a creation. She
    returned the day afterwards, but she too seemed exhausted; she was
    covered and bruises and scrapes, her hair was matted, and where once her
    manner was passionate, now it was deflated. She handed me the filled
    vial.

    “What did you feel, on those bloodied grounds?” I asked. She was silent.

    “What did you feel, as you planted the saplings in the forest?” She remained quiet.

    “The
    sound of a life beginning is slight- just at the edge of hearing. But
    that wondrous sound is turned harsh and grating by violence.”

    “Did you hear it?” I asked. I took her hand solemnly, and met her eyes.

    “If you are still deaf to it, that is fine. But please, do not turn the music of life into the noise of violence.”

    I stayed there, my eyes intently gazing into hers.

    “The
    matriarch spoke with me.” I continued, “She wishes you to be
    apprenticed to me. You have proven yourself a capable worker. Will you
    stay?”

        She gave me a long stare, and then took the weapon in her hands. She tossed it into the forge.

       
    We watched the weapon become white-hot and soften, losing its edge. I
    set aside the bellows and let the flames die out on their own, leaving
    only a shapeless mound of simmering metal behind.

  • im rlly out of it cuz i read that as the sonic at the edge of hedgehog
  • Dammit! I should've written THAT
  • ...And even when your hope is gone
    move along, move along, just to make it through
    (2015 self)
    ... Daaaang, Kexruct.

    That was beautiful.

    The way you included the tactile aspect of the forge, the weight and texture of metals, people hardly ever includes the tactile sense in writing.


    And the appreciation of the craft of smithing, it shows that you really thought and cared here.

    Also, the moral was lovely in its sincerity. Not even being nice here, I read the thing and thought that you were reporting it from somewhere until I read it a second time and looked at the beginning of your earlier post.

    One thing: "intently gazing" is the phrase that made me think, "wait, did Kex write this himself?". On first read. Dunno why.
  • More people have said that and been killed than there are thorium decay products.
    I liked your thing.
    naney said:

    im rlly out of it cuz i read that as the sonic at the edge of hedgehog

    I laughed way too much at this post. Sonic jokes and all that.
  • You added a bit of description about the weapon being twisted and misshapen at the end, didn't you? I rather like it.

    Good for you, Kex. It's a solid story and I'm glad it was recognized.
  • I worried that it was heavy-handed, but screw it, I'll work out proper implementation of themes first and subtlety later.
  • Thank you guys! Also, tbh Aliroz, I really don't know much about blacksmithing.
  • Kexruct said:

    I worried that it was heavy-handed, but screw it, I'll work out proper implementation of themes first and subtlety later.

    this is a good idea i think


  • Speaking of heavy handed I only recently saw this movie but this is already one of the most important scenes I've ever watched, tbh.
  • sunn wolf said:

    Paging naney, ive had a few drinks and right now drunk buying this

    image
    and these
    image
    is seeming like a good idea, Y/N

    copped these, no regrets
  • naney said:
    looking at this again probably a the jumpers you got there like the white one and the charcoal one w stripes at the bottom would probably be reasonably versatile, i guess so long as the roll neck thing isn't actually part of the jumper
  • My dreams exceed my real life

    Donald's friends are jerks.
  • ...And even when your hope is gone
    move along, move along, just to make it through
    (2015 self)
    Well, " I was taught that I must dedicate all my senses and thoughts to mastering metalwork, which, my master said, was the key to the continued life of the village. It was my master who taught me to allow the heat and clamor wash over me, and reverberate through me, and how to lay eyes only on the metal but to still see everything around me" is still dang cool.
  • im awake

    my dad is coming

    (*sigh*)
  • My dreams exceed my real life

    These are great.
  • My dreams exceed my real life
    I have a driving lesson in two hours.

    Fortune,
    like the moon
    you are changeable,
    ever waxing
    and waning;
    hateful life
    first oppresses
    and then soothes
    as fancy takes it;
    poverty
    and power
    it melts them like ice.

    Fate – monstrous
    and empty,
    you whirling wheel,
    you are malevolent,
    well-being is vain
    and always fades to nothing,
    shadowed
    and veiled
    you plague me too;
    now through the game
    I bring my bare back
    to your villainy.

    Fate is against me
    in health
    and virtue,
    driven on
    and weighted down,
    always enslaved.
    So at this hour
    without delay
    pluck the vibrating strings;
    since Fate
    strikes down the strong man,
    everyone weep with me!
  • why dont soundcloud embeds work anymore
  • naney said:

    im rlly out of it cuz i read that as the sonic at the edge of hedgehog

    I just realized that "Sonic the Hedgehog" contains "edge".
    Panurge said:

    I have a driving lesson in two hours.

    Fortune,
    like the moon
    you are changeable,
    ever waxing
    and waning;
    hateful life
    first oppresses
    and then soothes
    as fancy takes it;
    poverty
    and power
    it melts them like ice.

    Fate – monstrous
    and empty,
    you whirling wheel,
    you are malevolent,
    well-being is vain
    and always fades to nothing,
    shadowed
    and veiled
    you plague me too;
    now through the game
    I bring my bare back
    to your villainy.

    Fate is against me
    in health
    and virtue,
    driven on
    and weighted down,
    always enslaved.
    So at this hour
    without delay
    pluck the vibrating strings;
    since Fate
    strikes down the strong man,
    everyone weep with me!
    1. I started attempting to sing this to the tune of O Canada.
    2. seeing "ice" made me think of the "very thin ice" meme from Auto-Tune The News.

    ----

    Freddy Fazbear x Lesbears x Lilly Ledbetter Fair Pay Act = Lilly Lesbear Fair Pay Act
  • edited 2015-03-28 16:59:51
    syllable followed by no space = sixteenth
    syllable followed by space or underscore = eighth

    march rhythm:

    iSAW two DOORS one SHINEDuponbyTHElight_ _
    iSAW two DOORS one SHINEDuponbyTHElight_ _
    iSAW two DOORS one SHINEDuponbyTHElight_ _
    iSAW two DOORS one SHINEDuponbyTHElight_ _

    that is an example of bad verbal choreography or whatever the right term is

    notice that "the" is not an important word but is on a downbeat

    english language pop songs like to do stupid things like these

    going along with pushing words onto the music even though they don't fit
  • Spnic the Avenue 3 and Knuckles
  • My dreams exceed my real life
    Panurge said:

    I have a driving lesson in two hours.

    Fortune,
    like the moon
    you are changeable,
    ever waxing
    and waning;
    hateful life
    first oppresses
    and then soothes
    as fancy takes it;
    poverty
    and power
    it melts them like ice.

    Fate – monstrous
    and empty,
    you whirling wheel,
    you are malevolent,
    well-being is vain
    and always fades to nothing,
    shadowed
    and veiled
    you plague me too;
    now through the game
    I bring my bare back
    to your villainy.

    Fate is against me
    in health
    and virtue,
    driven on
    and weighted down,
    always enslaved.
    So at this hour
    without delay
    pluck the vibrating strings;
    since Fate
    strikes down the strong man,
    everyone weep with me!
    Jesus Christ, why is this being done to me.

    What did I do wrong.
  • My dreams exceed my real life
    I am a trapped animal pondering whether to gnaw its own leg off
  • it's funny because Zwei II is the name of a game

    but Zwei!! is the name of its prequel

    but if you invert ! it becomes i

    so you need to invert everything else

    invert Z => S
    invert w => m
    invert e => ϑ
    invert i => !

    ENFORCE CONSISTENCY :-DDDDDDDDDDDD
  • JOKES MUST BE INTERNALLY CONSISTENT

    EXCEPT FOR THE ONES WHO ARE DEAD THAT AREN'T
  • edited 2015-03-28 17:17:41
    NOTICE THAT A SPACE WAS STRUCK OUT

    THAT IS BECAUSE THAT SPACE WOULD BE EXTRANEOUS IF IT WERE NOT STRUCK OUT BUT THE STRUCK OUT TEXT WERE REMOVED

    EITHER THAT SPACE OR THE ONE BEFORE WHO WOULD HAVE TO BE STRUCK OUT

    CONSERVATION OF CHARACTERS
  • edited 2015-03-28 17:18:51
    I EXPECT EVERY TEXT EDITOR TO FOLLOW CONSERVATION OF CHARACTERS

    THOSE THAT DO NOT ARE FUCKERS

    I EXPECT CONSISTENCY, NOT HALF-ASS ATTEMPTS TO BE SMART
  • edited 2015-03-28 17:21:42
    i never knew that chowder is a male character

    then again, i never cared about chowder's gender

    because gender doesn't matter! [/flamebait]

  • edited 2015-03-28 17:28:16
    As a practical matter, destroying the advertising industry could cripple the internet.

    But it's still fun to contemplate destroying the advertising industry and everything it's spawned, such as clickbait.
  • NOT ALL OF US HAVE HIGH-SPEED UNLIMITED-BANDWIDTH CONNECTIONS AND FULLY-MODERN-FEATURED BROWSERS

    START DESIGNING SOME SIMPLER WEBPAGES

    YOU OBNOXIOUS FUCKERS
  • man up, long loading times build character
  • naney said:

    man up, long loading times build character

    no zey don't
  • ...And even when your hope is gone
    move along, move along, just to make it through
    (2015 self)
    Long ago, in a distant land, I, Lucy, the shapeshifting master of evil, unleashed an UNSPEAKABLE football. But, a foolish blockhead warrior, fielding a magic foot, stepped forth to oppose me. Before the final ball was kicked, I tore open a portal in space, and flung the fool into the grass, where my evil is LAW. Now. the fool seeks to return his foot to the football, and undo the future that is VAN PELT!

    samurai chuck,
  • You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
    For a second there I thought you were playing Mad Libs
  • Touch the cow. Do it now.
    VAN PELT!
  • You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
    image

    This is what I imagine the RMC Roadwhale looks like
  • THIS MACHINE KILLS FASCISTS
  • Touch the cow. Do it now.
    I dreamed I had what the tropers call Godiva Hair

    yntkt
  • Touch the cow. Do it now.
    maybe that should go in the TMI thread but whatever
  • THIS MACHINE KILLS FASCISTS
    (there's a clip on youtube with the actual Simpsons footage on it, but it's shot off of someone's TV. Fuck that, fuck Fox, and fuck Hulu too because I know that's the reason people are forced to do that. They can suck my dick.)
  • You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
    Also, if you noticed the emergency lights in the grille and windshield of that truck I posted, you're as big a dork as I am

    This means you, Lee :P
  • ...And even when your hope is gone
    move along, move along, just to make it through
    (2015 self)
    I don't see the problem with that, Lee.


    I wouldn't want my stuff on the internet, either.
  • ...And even when your hope is gone
    move along, move along, just to make it through
    (2015 self)
    If I ever get uppity or start complaining about how this place makes me feel about myself, or how things you guys do sometimes make me uncomfortable, just remind me that exmormon.org is a real thing, and I will be put back into perspective.
  • kill living beings
    military interdict in effect

    usage of this network by civilians is temporarily prohibited
  • Touch the cow. Do it now.
    Moroni
  • You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
    plays the mamba
  • maybe that should go in the TMI thread but whatever

    godiva hair isn't itself NSFW
  • Panurge said:


    Donald's friends are jerks.
    i'm never going to get used to the guy who took over from Wayne Allwine
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