The Trash Heap of the Heapers' Hangout

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  • i don't think it's blind


    he just accidentally rolled off of a cliff
    [try jumping]
  • edited 2014-03-29 23:01:04
    ...And even when your hope is gone
    move along, move along, just to make it through
    (2015 self)
    What happened?

    Flood?

    Shower?

    Rain?

    EDIT:  Oh, the perpetual rain.  I suppose it's like having the entire outside become one giant shower.  Good gosh, that's legitimately a frightening idea.  At least snow's not so drippy and liquid.
  • fact: i have never heard spiderland
  • fact: i have never heard spiderland

    it's kinda cool? I like it well enough even though it's not the sort of thing I usually listen to.
  • oh wait yeah it's blind
  • edited 2014-03-29 23:05:53
    ...And even when your hope is gone
    move along, move along, just to make it through
    (2015 self)
    I wish my valley could take half or two thirds of the rain from your area. 

    HEY, RAIN, HERE'S A NICE VALLEY THAT'S HAD SEVERAL DROUGHT YEARS IN A ROW. 
  • My dreams exceed my real life

    fact: i have never heard spiderland

    it's kinda cool? I like it well enough even though it's not the sort of thing I usually listen to.
    I like it too
  • “I'm surprised. Those clothes… but, aren't you…?”
    Odradek said:

    fact: i have never heard spiderland

    it's kinda cool? I like it well enough even though it's not the sort of thing I usually listen to.
    I like it too
    Me too.

    The guitar tones are gorgeous in a strange, dry way, and "Don, A Man" is really, really unsettling if you're in a certain mindset.

    "Don stepped outside..."
  • edited 2014-03-29 23:16:52
    ...And even when your hope is gone
    move along, move along, just to make it through
    (2015 self)
    Speaking of too much water, up at my grandmother's ranch (my paternal grandmother, the one who now is sadly without a husband); pipe broke, flooding happened.   Soil saturated, house slightly flooded (between one or two feet).

    Pipe now fixed, water draining starting to happen.

    Mister costs, would you like to be affordable y/y?  And things turn out to not be as bad as they seem y/y?  And ground under foundations be non-soaked y/y?  Pipe never break again y/y?

    Problems be fixable and damage be only superficial y/y/y/y?

    (okay, nobody lives there anymore since Grandma moved to my valley to have an apartment so as to be closer to relatives and hospitals and everything; but I spent a good bunch of my childhood at that place!)
  • You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
    Did you see Dollar Depot sells magic wands now? I picked one up because I was curious as to how it stacks up against the real thing.

    It's "Magestic" brand, which appears to be the name Dollar Depot uses for magic supplies. I guess it's supposed to be a play on "magic" and "majestic", but it just ends up looking like they don't know how to spell.

    Let's look at the packaging:

    MAGESTIC

    MAGIC WAND

    • Compatible with Princess Magic and Anarchy Magic!

    • Sleek, modern design!

    • Exciting third bullet point!
    DISTRIBUTED BY DOLLAR DEPOT STORES PLC
    1696 PENNYWISE PKWY, COLERAIN, CENTRALIA


    WARNING: NOT SUITABLE FOR CHILDREN UNDER 3 YEARS OF AGE DUE TO POSSIBLY BEING ONE OF LORD VOLDEMORT'S HORCRUXES
  • imagei will watch the heck outta this pumpkin patch
    oh come on

    what self-respecting dark lord would put a piece of his soul into a dollar depot wand
  • edited 2014-03-29 23:17:43
    ...And even when your hope is gone
    move along, move along, just to make it through
    (2015 self)
    People involved with draining and insurance be scrupulous and non-evil and have integrity y/y/y/y/y/y/y/y/y/y/y/y
  • My dreams exceed my real life
    Harry Potter and the Methods of Being Insufferable at Parties.
  • ...And even when your hope is gone
    move along, move along, just to make it through
    (2015 self)
    Odradek said:

    Harry Potter and the Methods of Being Insufferable at Parties.

    I read that as
    Odradek said:

    Harry Potter and the Methods of Being Insufferable at Pastries.

  • We can do anything if we do it together.

    Odradek said:

    fact: i have never heard spiderland

    it's kinda cool? I like it well enough even though it's not the sort of thing I usually listen to.
    I like it too
    Me too.

    The guitar tones are gorgeous in a strange, dry way, and "Don, A Man" is really, really unsettling if you're in a certain mindset.

    "Don stepped outside..."
    I'm partial towards "Breadcrumb Trail" myself.
  • You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
    Tachyon said:

    oh come on

    what self-respecting dark lord would put a piece of his soul into a dollar depot wand

    I think their lawyers make them print that disclaimer on everything

    Anyway, I've taken it out of the package now

    Which, ironically, required the use of my own magic wand, since it was in one of those obnoxious blister packs and Guardsman Payne won't let me have utility knives anymore since that one time that--right, the wand.

    It feels very cheap and flimsy. About what you'd expect for a dollar, I suppose, but you certainly wouldn't want to use this as your daily driver. It bends a little bit, which I never like in a wand, and it feels like if I press too hard on it I could snap it in half. It also doesn't have that little star at the end, but let's face it, those don't really do anything other than making your wand look pretty, do they?
  • edited 2014-03-29 23:24:08
    ...And even when your hope is gone
    move along, move along, just to make it through
    (2015 self)

    Tachyon said:

    oh come on

    what self-respecting dark lord would put a piece of his soul into a dollar depot wand

    I think their lawyers make them print that disclaimer on everything

    Anyway, I've taken it out of the package now

    Which, ironically, required the use of my own magic wand, since it was in one of those obnoxious blister packs and Guardsman Payne won't let me have utility knives anymore since that one time that--right, the wand.
    Is that why he has that chunk out of his ear that he likes to hide under his guardsman hat?
  • You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
    Sorry, Aliroz, I can't hear you over the sound of me continuing this review!

    Alright, I'm going to try to use it. Just something simple: starting a fire in the fireplace. Not my own fireplace, of course, in case it blows up or something. I'm going to use the fireplace in Anonus's study!
  • edited 2014-03-29 23:32:45
    ...And even when your hope is gone
    move along, move along, just to make it through
    (2015 self)

    Sorry, Aliroz, I can't hear you over the sound of me continuing this review!


    Alright, I'm going to try to use it. Just something simple: starting a fire in the fireplace. Not my own fireplace, of course, in case it blows up or something. I'm going to use the fireplace in Anonus's study!
    NO!  The books!

    -tackle-

    -misses-

    Curse Centie's Catlike Circumvention Capabilities!
  • “I'm surprised. Those clothes… but, aren't you…?”

    I'm partial towards "Breadcrumb Trail" myself.

    Beautiful song, but more seasick and eerie than viscerally disturbing. "Breadcrumb Trail" and "Washer" have lovely playing, but "Don, Aman" and "Good Morning Captain" are just... yikes.
  • You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
    I don't think you need to worry about the books. I've been trying for almost a minute now and the logs in the fireplace are barely even warm.

    I know, I know, what do you expect for a dollar, but this is ridiculous.
  • edited 2014-03-29 23:35:48
    “I'm surprised. Those clothes… but, aren't you…?”
    Use a chip of enchanted amethyst, a small vice, and some sigil-inscribed electrum film. The consistent ticks of magical energy will give you a nice, regular boost.
  • edited 2014-03-29 23:37:11
    ...And even when your hope is gone
    move along, move along, just to make it through
    (2015 self)
    Thank goodness.

    So, this wand, it's equivalent in worth to one hundred of these:


    image
  • Touch the cow. Do it now.
    candy cigarettes, heh heh heh
  • I've learned to tolerate drama...except on the boat
    is "Refreshing Orange Flavor!" set in Burbank

    a typeface from 2007?
  • You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022

    Use a chip of enchanted amethyst, a small vice, and some sigil-inscribed electrum film. The consistent ticks of magical energy will give you a nice, regular boost.

    Ok, got all that stuff

    Which took a while because I don't actually keep any magic supplies on this floor and I had to go upstairs to my private pantry, but whatever

    It's working a little better now...the logs seem to actually be getting hot, at least, and there's a bit of smoke...but still no flame.
  • You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
    Aaaah it's quite a lot of smoke, actually

    Yeah, I'm going to have to open the windows

    In the middle of a snowstorm

    This was a bad idea
  • “I'm surprised. Those clothes… but, aren't you…?”
    Invert the flow of the charge...

    ...wait, no, don't do that, the wand might explode.
  • Touch the cow. Do it now.
    I need to say "tits" for some reason

    tits
  • “I'm surprised. Those clothes… but, aren't you…?”
    BOIDS.
  • imagei will watch the heck outta this pumpkin patch
    i need to post an animal gif for some reason

    image
  • You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
    So my attempt to light a fire in the fireplace has led to me opening the windows, thus letting in cold air.

    I've effectively accomplished the opposite of what I intended to do.

    At least it was only a dollar...?
  • imagei will watch the heck outta this pumpkin patch
    they probably ought to sell these things with a warning about modifying them

    you're lucky all it did was smoke
  • Touch the cow. Do it now.
  • imagei will watch the heck outta this pumpkin patch
    who wants some Godam juice?

    image
  • edited 2014-03-29 23:56:06
    Touch the cow. Do it now.
    ^^^lolz
  • You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
    I'm tempted to snap the thing in half but it would probably explode in my face or something

    How does one dispose of a cheap, crappy wand?
  • So my attempt to light a fire in the fireplace has led to me opening the windows, thus letting in cold air.


    I've effectively accomplished the opposite of what I intended to do.

    At least it was only a dollar...?
    my queen

    why did you not just call your trusty Royal Witch
  • this after all is what you pay me $66/hour to do.
  • edited 2014-03-30 00:02:29

    image
    image
  • Touch the cow. Do it now.
    I get paid $666/hour to give the best milk there is and also manage the library
  • imagei will watch the heck outta this pumpkin patch
    Nobody wants any Godam juice?

    Fine, i'll just keep all the Godam juice for myself.
  • Touch the cow. Do it now.
    goddammit
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