stunt rock is the best musician because he has the best track names
Really Harsh Noisy Breaks Don't Cover Up For Lack Of Talent, Or Do They?
If I Would Have Opened With A Noise Track, Everyone Would Think I'm Tough, Right?
All The Baggy Pants In The World Won't Change The Fact That You Are One Ugly Bitch
Anyone Who Names A Track "So & So Can Kiss My Such & Such Ass" Can Kiss My (Adjective) (Noun) Ass
Ballad of The Angry Drunk White Jungle M.C. Misanthrope Who Is Brocking Out In Mom’s Basement, Part One
I Can't Even Tell When I'm Being Sarcastic Anymore (I Really Care About Underground Music, Politics, Your "Independant" Record Label, and the Fact That You Have a Subscription to Adbusters)
He put out a split with VSnares and was the better of the two throughout
On June 10th, 2006, in front of an intimate crowd of followers, William Stunt Rock retired from performing. Stunt Rock will continue making music and working on various projects, but does not wish to continue with live shows. As for reasons for the retirement, at commencement of the final live set a list was handed out that featured the fifty reasons for the retirement. They were recorded as follows:
01. I am tired of having to kiss peoples asses in order to get them to come to my shows.
02. I am tired of having to remind these same people to come to my shows over and over.
03. I don’t want these people there, nor do they even want to be there. Said guests and I are just doing things out of
guilt for each other, which is not healthy.
04. I am tired of having to get really drunk on stage and sleep over at someone else’s house near the venue,
when all I really want to do is go home.
05. I am very annoyed with getting paid less than $7 an hour to perform on stage
(When you factor in prep time, load in, sound check, etc.)
06. Lack of free beer and oral sex after performing.
07. Lack of interest in performing in general.
08. Lack of interest in hobbies and other endeavors where I am not guaranteed a certain per hour income.
09. The fact that I would actually pay myself more NOT to have to play shows. For example, on average, I would pay myself $300 to stay home, get up early, mow the lawn, and clean the house as opposed to stand on stage until 2am getting drunk in front of strangers.
10. No one takes my stand up comedy routine serious, resulting in constant shouting over my jokes and routines.
This is very disheartening and has resulted in a decline in on stage humor.
11. All my fans in Wisconsin are meth heads.
12. All my fans in Illinois are grown men stuck in a perpetual state of frat boy jocularity.
13. In 8 years I have yet to meet a fellow performer who shares my own opinions and views of the world.
As a result, a feeling of isolation is perpetual.
14. The one time after 8 years that I finally went home with a chick was extremely disappointing and led to a
significant moment of clarity, perhaps for the first time in my adult life.
15. No one appreciates my attempts at melding with hip hop culture and instead wishes to force me into the long dead hardcore rave scene.
16. Stupid music labels like “Indie Hop” and “Breakcore” and “Experimental Hip Hop” and “Mash Up.”
17. People who review my albums without knowing my complete discography.
18. Is my loss of hearing really worth your enjoyment?
19. Concern about my prostate.
20. The fact that after 8 years, I still have to be fall down drunk in order to stand up in front of a group of strangers and play.
21. Lack of interest in general from people who claim to be “big fans.”
22. I am tired of having to explain to my ex girlfriend why I don’t want her to come to my shows.
23. Standing in poorly ventilated clubs filled with smoke doesn’t seem like a very healthy thing to do.
24. In a way I feel like I am selfishly forcing my real friends to drive approx. 45 to stand around, get drunk, and then be forced to drive home and get potential D.U.I.’s.
25. Making music comes to easy these days and seems a bit to formulaic even for my simple methods.
26. All fans with girlfriends serve as a constant reminder of what I should really be doing with my life; meeting a life partner.
27. My fanbase grows at the approximate rate of 2 males per 8 shows played, and 1 female per 34 shows played. (Actual statistics).
28. The majority of my fanbase would rather buy me a beer than buy my new CD or T-Shirt.
29. Venues without a backstage area.
30. Friends and fans that want to be guest listed.
31. Having to listen to people’s shitty excuses about why they didn’t make it to a show. (Most common excuses in order: Girlfriend was Being a Bitch, No Ride, No Oxycotin, Forgot Venue Information, Met Hot Chick , No Money, Can’t Find I.D., Overslept).
32. The majority of women I am finding interested in me because of my music are either: a. Divorced or b. between the ages of 17-19.
33. Simply put, why am I trying to become what I don’t want to be?
34. I only smoke cigarettes in the weeks leading up to, and during, a show.
35. My car is getting old and I am tired of driving it all over Wisconsin, Illinois, Minnesota, and Indiana.
36. Touring Europe free of charge for 3 weeks at a time is extremely overrated when all you care about is staying home.
39. No girls in Europe want to get to know traveling American musicians with self esteem issues.
40. Fellow musicians constantly mock me and downplay me into “token funny opening act” slots which I have outgrown.
41. I’m almost at the age where all of my heroes died. Isn’t that a clue to hang it up?
42. My father does not understand or sees no artistic merit in what I do.
43. Lack of merchandise sales over all.
44. My last two albums have been a mockery of my mid period “good” albums which where created while I lived in my moms basement as a 25 year old man. Since moving out, subsequent albums have just been riffing on the same material with sub par results.
45. Wrist pain.
46. According to studies, I would drink less if I stopped playing music.
47. Pressure from my Mother to “grow the fuck up and stop goofing around with these computers and friends.”
48. Catching colds at shows is a common occurrence.
49. The guy doing the documentary on me is starting to get a little “weird.”
also there's this song that is like the sample of a squaredance thing combined with what sounds like the crazy bus theme and then there's this distorted breakbeat
i think it says something about me that there are only a few bands that really resonate with me and they are fonts of abject neurosis and/or a kind of bittersweet despair or naivete
You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
I have characters floating around in my head but no plot and only half a setting
You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
Stunt Rock's track names are, in fact, terrible and whiny, and Stunt Rock himself is terrible and whiny, though his music is good sometimes
also in other news i just discovered facebook's "Other" messages folder tucked away in some obscure corner and oh look its an invitation to be in a band from 3 months ago, cheers FB for filing that away in the middle of fucking nowhere
I am in no way talking about Sound Quality; even the Statiklites from the Elemental Plane of Noise have heard about what you can do to improve sound qulity with modern manipulation (heck, the most recent advances in sound engineering make creatures like Statiklites vulnerable to erasure, even! They didn't see that coming in the 1920s, when they ran roughshod over Atlanta).
No, I am not talking about Sound Quality, but rather of a very subtle 'other' Quality, one of Synchronicity and Oneness of Identity... can you dig it? You can use a vinyl record to travel back in time; to Teleport across the planet. You can inhale the very Soul of Etta James. You can't do that with a .wav file.
So, for Shamanic purposes, it is the analog devices which carry the greater Juju. The digital ones are mere image-copiers; it is a film camera which can steal your soul, not a digital one.
Take my word for it- I'm a certified member of the LADS ("League of Aetheric Diabolists and Shamans) and there is a stiff -10 penalty on all Klepto-Nercomancy involving Digital Props.
Comments
I mean what the hell is this shit seriously
I actually sent that to someone to rap over
Do you not think that's a rappable beat?
I don't know
CamQuarter said he liked it but he couldn't see himself on it.
That's the second time I've gotten that response from someone.
Franz Ferdinand was murdered by operatives of the US government to stop labour reforms.
Stunt Rock's track names are, in fact, terrible and whiny, and Stunt Rock himself is terrible and whiny, though his music is good sometimes
also in other news i just discovered facebook's "Other" messages folder tucked away in some obscure corner and oh look its an invitation to be in a band from 3 months ago, cheers FB for filing that away in the middle of fucking nowhere
liz harris why is everything you do really really great
omg i have chosen the week im going to be in london over easter and im so glad because
27th March: Mirrorring at rudolf steiner house
28th March: Raime + Demdike Stare at the waiting room
30th March: Squarepusher at the roundhouse
4th April: SWANS at koko
fuuuuuuuuuck
i remember when mouse on the keys came to town and i was 17 and i couldnt go
then they came to town again 3 months later when i was old enough :B
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/William_Bennett_(disambiguation)
youll know it when you see it