What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I’m the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You’re fucking dead, kiddo.
Avaunt! What affront didst thou just proclaimest against my honour, foul knave? I would that thou knowest I was knighted by King Richard the Lionheart himself, and I've taken part in numerous holy Crusades against the Saracen dogs, and I have slain over 300 heathens. I am trained in siege warfare and I'm the fairest knight in the entire kingdom. Thou'rt nothing to me, merely another knave. If only thou couldst have known what holy retribution thy wretched "clever" comment wouldst bring down upon thee, perhaps thou wouldst have held thy serpent tongue. But thou couldst not, thou didst not, and now thy blood shall be recompense for my dishonour, wretched villain. I shall rain fury from the heavens and thou shalt drown in it. Thou'rt already passed, peasant.
By the throne what did you just say about me, you puny heretic? In the name of the emperor I'll have you know I am the finest, and fiercest of my class in the Ultramarines, and I've been involved in numerous secret raids on Black Crusades, and I have over 300,000 confirmed reclaimations in the name of the Emperor. I am trained in brute warfare and I'm the top terminator in the entire first company. You are nothing to me but just another heretic. I will tear your heretical face out with fury the likes of which has never been seen before on Terra, mark the throne. You think you can get away with saying that heresy to me over the Warp? Think again, Heretic. As we exchange words I am contacting my secret network of Ultramarines across Macragge and your orbital position is being traced right now so you better prepare for the crusade, heretic. The crusade that wipes out the chaotic corrupted thing you call your life. In the name of the Emperor; you're dead, heretic. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can gore you in over fourty thousand hundred ways, and that's just with my bare power suit augmented knuckles. Not only am I extensively trained in assault combat, but I have access to the entire, glorious arsenal of Macragge and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable corrupted ass off the face of the warp, you little heretic. If only you could have known what holy retribution your little "clever" comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your plagued tonuge. But you couldn't, you didn't, and now you're paying the price, you heretical bastard. I will wreak fury all over you and you will drown in the gore. By the Emperor, you're dead; heretic.
What the in the name of the Queen did you just fucking say about me, you little chav? I'll have you know I graduated top of my class in the SAS, and I've been involved in numerous secret raids on Ireland, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gentlemanly warfare and I'm the top rooter tooter long range shooter in the entire UK armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this great planet, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, chap. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the world and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, banger. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You're fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that's just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the Royal Marines and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable arse off the face of the continent, you little muppet. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little "clever" comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn't, you didn't, and now you're paying the price, you goddamn dolt. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You're fucking dead, mate.
What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little pleb? I'll have you know I graduated top of my class in Art School, and I've been involved in numerous listens of NMH on vinyl , and I have over 3000 confirmed songs in my Foobar 2000 playlist. I am trained in songwriting and tumblr use and I'm the top vinyl collector in the record store I work at. You are nothing to me but just another mainstream listening pleb. I will wipe you the fuck out with music the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am readying my field recordings, be prepared for a storm of 2deep4u. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your taste. Not only am I extensively trained in tumblr use, but I have access to the entire collection over at Amoeba Records and I will use it to its full extent to better your miserable pleb taste. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little "clever" comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn't, you didn't, and now you're paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit obscurity all over you and you will drown in it. You're a fucking pleb, kiddo.
What the fuck did you just fucking say about my cooking, you little bitch? I'll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Culinary Institute of America, and I've been involved in numerous iron chef challenges, and I have over 300 confirmed recipes for Créme fraiche. I am trained in Habachi and I'm the top cook at my local Japanese Steak House. You are nothing to me but just another ingredient. I will feed you with culinary skills the likes of which have never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with serving that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, busboy. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of celebrity chefs across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the feast, stomach. The feast that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your cooking. You're fucking dead, sous chef. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can cook for you in over seven hundred ways, and that's just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed grilling but I have access to the entire arsenal of appetizers at Fridays and I will use them to their full extent to wipe your hunger off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy concoction your little "clever" recipe was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have waited for desert. But you couldn't, you didn't, and now you're paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will cook a ferociously delicious Béchamel sauce for you and you will drown in it. You're going to be fucking stuffed, kiddo.
What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little pleb? I'll have you know I graduated top of my class in Art School, and I've been involved in numerous listens of NMH on vinyl , and I have over 3000 confirmed songs in my Foobar 2000 playlist. I am trained in songwriting and tumblr use and I'm the top vinyl collector in the record store I work at. You are nothing to me but just another mainstream listening pleb. I will wipe you the fuck out with music the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am readying my field recordings, be prepared for a storm of 2deep4u. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your taste. Not only am I extensively trained in tumblr use, but I have access to the entire collection over at Amoeba Records and I will use it to its full extent to better your miserable pleb taste. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little "clever" comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn't, you didn't, and now you're paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit obscurity all over you and you will drown in it. You're a fucking pleb, kiddo.
What in the name of the Lord did ye just proclaim about me, knave? I'll have ye know I was dubbed top of my knight squadron in the armie, I hath battled in numerous sieges on traitorous lords, and I hath more than three hundred confirmed kills. I am extensively disciplined in gorilla warfare and I am the top archer in the entire armie. Ye are merely 'nother enemy to slay. I shall abolish ye with precision such as has never been witnessed by Gods or men, hear my words. Think ye that ye can escape my wrath after uttering such filthy remarks? Rethink ye words, miscreant. As we speak, I am sending word of ye by raven to my network of spies across the realm, and ye hideout is soon to be located, so brace yourself for attack, fool. The storm that exterminates ye pitiful life, if that it can be named. Ye are good as dead, lad. I may be present in any shadow around ye, and I am capable of subduing ye in over seven hundred ways, and that is merely with mine own hands. I was not only tutored in gauntlet-to-gauntlet, but I possess the right to any weapon in my liege lord's extensive armory, and I intend to fully utilize it to erase your insignificant presence off our holy realm, ye insufferable scoundrel. I can only wish ye would have had the foresight to comprehend what heinous punishment your little "witty" quip were destined to result in; mayhap then ye would have withheld from voicing it. But ye could not, ye did not, and now ye shall pay with your blood, ye God-forsaken imbecile. I shall unleash unholy ire on ye and ye shall be inundated in it. Ye are carrion food, cretin.
What in the name of the Lord did ye just proclaim about me, knave? I'll have ye know I was dubbed top of my knight squadron in the armie, I hath battled in numerous sieges on traitorous lords, and I hath more than three hundred confirmed kills. I am extensively disciplined in gorilla warfare and I am the top archer in the entire armie. Ye are merely 'nother enemy to slay. I shall abolish ye with precision such as has never been witnessed by Gods or men, hear my words. Think ye that ye can escape my wrath after uttering such filthy remarks? Rethink ye words, miscreant. As we speak, I am sending word of ye by raven to my network of spies across the realm, and ye hideout is soon to be located, so brace yourself for attack, fool. The storm that exterminates ye pitiful life, if that it can be named. Ye are good as dead, lad. I may be present in any shadow around ye, and I am capable of subduing ye in over seven hundred ways, and that is merely with mine own hands. I was not only tutored in gauntlet-to-gauntlet, but I possess the right to any weapon in my liege lord's extensive armory, and I intend to fully utilize it to erase your insignificant presence off our holy realm, ye insufferable scoundrel. I can only wish ye would have had the foresight to comprehend what heinous punishment your little "witty" quip were destined to result in; mayhap then ye would have withheld from voicing it. But ye could not, ye did not, and now ye shall pay with your blood, ye God-forsaken imbecile. I shall unleash unholy ire on ye and ye shall be inundated in it. Ye are carrion food, cretin.
What in the name of the Valar did you just fucking say about me, you little Dark Lord? I'll have you know I graduated top of my class in the White Council, and I've been involved in numerous secret raids on Mordor, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla magic and I'm the top wizard in the entire Middle Earth forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Middle Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over a Palantír? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of eagles across the realm and your location is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, you fool of a Took. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You're fucking dead, dotard. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that's just with my staff. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed bridge defense, but I have access to the entire arsenal of Gondor and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of Arda, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little "clever" comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn't, you didn't, and now you're paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit magic all over you and you will drown in it. You're fucking dead, dwimmerlaik.
Gorilla Warfare: Über-Special training only the most elite Fake Navy Seals get. Acceptance into the Gorilla Warfare Training program only takes place if the participant has achieved Enormous fake achievements, and has proven oneself on many fake secret missions. Upon arrival, the participant must fight the local hierarchy of Gorillas, all the way to the silver-back. Each tier progressively gets more oil poured on the combatant gorilla, as to make it harder.
What in the name of the Valar did you just fucking say about me, you little Dark Lord? I'll have you know I graduated top of my class in the White Council, and I've been involved in numerous secret raids on Mordor, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla magic and I'm the top wizard in the entire Middle Earth forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Middle Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over a Palantír? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of eagles across the realm and your location is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, you fool of a Took. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You're fucking dead, dotard. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that's just with my staff. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed bridge defense, but I have access to the entire arsenal of Gondor and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of Arda, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little "clever" comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn't, you didn't, and now you're paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit magic all over you and you will drown in it. You're fucking dead, dwimmerlaik.
Remember a little while back the discussion you and I had about how the mixing of Church and State was just all-around bad? One corrupts the other and they both turn out worse for it. It's not an insult against the religious, it's a valid criticism against something that mankind has known about for centuries and why the United States, at its inception, made sure to draw a very clear line between Church and State. Yes,
But I wanted to say "Literally the same as Hitler". "LITERALLY HITLER" has also been something of a running joke among critics of the left lately because it seems that's the comparison people (of who don't know what "literally" actually means) like to use.
"This election period has revealed , very starkly, as none before, the sonambulistic trance of the modern US citizen. The rote behaviors, and the rote feelings. If people have internalized corporate kitsch image and narrative, and we know they have, then that includes gesture and emotion in some way. The attachment to favorite brands is all the same; brand Obama is the same as Brand Clearasil or Brand Toyota, or Brand Jay-Z. The sleepwalking trope raises its head over and over and over. For people, the young have been encouraged (by marketers) to form a brand of independent self. To create, from corporate parts, a unique self. It is all found material. It is all living only within an enclosed virtual world of commodity relation.
The aesthetic independence required for a radical vision to coalesce, especially to coalesce around a core group, has been neutered in large measure by the creation of an oppositonal marketed owner of artistic opinion. The young consumer, the discriminating consumer of smart products of culture.
*I love the new Coen Brothers film…”, or “I love the new david lynch film”, or “I love donnie darko”….etc. The more decontexualized the cultural product, the more de-politicized, the easier to own and *like*. One can even *like* acceptable political product, marketed politics. “I loved that new film about the inner city school teacher who helps her class….”, “Oh I saw that two years ago on Breaking Bad”."
God.
Marxists.
Just accept that you're basically conservatives at this point.
Remember a little while back the discussion you and I had about how the mixing of Church and State was just all-around bad? One corrupts the other and they both turn out worse for it. It's not an insult against the religious, it's a valid criticism against something that mankind has known about for centuries and why the United States, at its inception, made sure to draw a very clear line between Church and State.
But the CoE have generally been seen as a good thing (tm).
Its just recently its became a bastion of conservatives (like Catholicism in Europe has).
i get so angry sometimes i just punch plankton --Klinotaxis
Zedd Always be yourself. Unless you can be a Unicorn. Then always be a Unicorn.
Yes!
Odradek where do you find these sources of mental diarrhea
this stuff you dig up is painful
This is like...his lot in life. I mean...some people decide "ice cream taster" is going to be their lot in life, and Odradek decided swimming through the dredges of the philosophical slime was going to be his.
Okay, so I'm writing a series of books called Stuck, as a lot of you may know, and the main character's basically a fictionalized version of myself (though I have tried to make him different from myself) named Tre Listman. Obviously the books focus on him, so it'd be alienating and dumb to make him a perfect, Adonis-on-earth kind of guy, wouldn't it?
I hate the term "Mary Sue". Seriously. Mary Sues, Gary Stus, Marty Sues-- whatever you may call it, it's all rather stupid. I've taken a lot of the Mary Sue litmus tests on some of my Stuck characters, and most of them get okay scores-- everyone, that is, except Tre. He always gets shafted on them since he's "me, but better" -- a signifying trait of a Mary Sue, which is more or less when an author fulfills their own wishes through a character. And sure, maybe I might do that a bit, but I can genuinely say that if I had to deal with teen mobsters, zombies, and being framed for ridiculously fabricated crimes, I would not be the Tre you'd see in Stuck, I'd be dead. So yeah, basically I don't really find his character to entirely be based upon wish fulfillment.
However, there is one thing I do kind of make sure I limit myself over, and that's keeping him human. One of the books I've got planned is named Sparks, and that one has the Crew getting superpowers (Tre's girlfriend can manipulate time, his best friend teleports, etc. etc.). Tre himself doesn't though, and maybe I might be ridiculous for deciding that, but to be honest I want the whole cast, especially our hero (who's kind of a dick sometimes, but not always) to seem a bit more real than I've made them before. Sure, I'd love to be able to shoot lightning out of my hands or something, but I know that even in the context of making my main character it'd be making me overpowered in comparison to everyone else.
Well, that, and he'd probably end up electrocuting himself, but that's a different matter entirely.
Comments
Did you even read the article?
The Church of England are the only religious group that has a number of lords seat specifically for them. Yes,
But I wanted to say "Literally the same as Hitler".
Wow, the Click and Drag XKCD thing is really overwhelming. I wish I had a map.
Good times.
Assassin poems, Poems that shoot
guns. Poems that wrestle cops into alleys
and take their weapons leaving them dead
Philosophy failed me
...
Art cannot fail. It cannot
Do you even know how my country works?
The Church of England are the only religious group that has a number of lords seat specifically for them.
Remember a little while back the discussion you and I had about how the mixing of Church and State was just all-around bad? One corrupts the other and they both turn out worse for it. It's not an insult against the religious, it's a valid criticism against something that mankind has known about for centuries and why the United States, at its inception, made sure to draw a very clear line between Church and State. Yes,
But I wanted to say "Literally the same as Hitler".
"LITERALLY HITLER" has also been something of a running joke among critics of the left lately because it seems that's the comparison people (of who don't know what "literally" actually means) like to use.
"This election period has revealed , very starkly, as none before, the sonambulistic trance of the modern US citizen. The rote behaviors, and the rote feelings. If people have internalized corporate kitsch image and narrative, and we know they have, then that includes gesture and emotion in some way. The attachment to favorite brands is all the same; brand Obama is the same as Brand Clearasil or Brand Toyota, or Brand Jay-Z. The sleepwalking trope raises its head over and over and over. For people, the young have been encouraged (by marketers) to form a brand of independent self. To create, from corporate parts, a unique self. It is all found material. It is all living only within an enclosed virtual world of commodity relation.
The aesthetic independence required for a radical vision to coalesce, especially to coalesce around a core group, has been neutered in large measure by the creation of an oppositonal marketed owner of artistic opinion. The young consumer, the discriminating consumer of smart products of culture.
*I love the new Coen Brothers film…”, or “I love the new david lynch film”, or “I love donnie darko”….etc. The more decontexualized the cultural product, the more de-politicized, the easier to own and *like*. One can even *like* acceptable political product, marketed politics. “I loved that new film about the inner city school teacher who helps her class….”, “Oh I saw that two years ago on Breaking Bad”."
God.
Marxists.
Just accept that you're basically conservatives at this point.
Its just recently its became a bastion of conservatives (like Catholicism in Europe has).
I mean, it's basically attacking their form of anorakia...
i get so angry sometimes i just punch plankton --Klinotaxis
I have work again tonight and am (afaik) spending most of my shift on re-training.
This means I get to sit in a yellow room and read a book for four hours.
yaaaaaay.