Rev 19:14-15

Obā-san · 2014-02-10 20:22:24

14And the armies which are in heaven, clothed in fine linen, white and clean, were following Him on white horses. 15From His mouth comes a sharp sword, so that with it He may strike down the nations, and He will rule them with a rod of iron; and He treads the wine press of the fierce wrath of God, the Almighty. 16And on His robe and on His thigh He has a name written, "KING OF KINGS, AND LORD OF LORDS."

you ever be reading the bible and you run across this passage and you're all like "whoa, a sword coming out of his mouth? what on earth could that possibly mean?!?!?!?"

Ladies and gentlemen, I have an answer for your theological musings:

Emeril's All Natural ROASTED GAAAHLIC Pasta Sauce.

This shit right here has the entire garlicness of a whole acre of garlic infused into every bite. You eat a plate of this? The armies of nations will fall before you like dominoes hurtling down a sharp incline at a rather worrying velocity, no problem.