Odradek reviews Full Moon Features movies and discusses philosophy books he's read

Odradek

Because I don't have enough projects.(Next Ib update and Dial H liveblog are coming soon.)

 

 

Coming soon...

Odradek

Okay so Demonic Toys.

From the title I was expecting some kind of thing where a family got a group of evil toys made by satanists or something, but that's not the case. It took me half an hour to realize that the apparent origin story taking place in a warehouse was actually going to be the whole movie. The action never leaves the warehouse of old toys it takes place in, which I guess is a good way to save on location costs.

So anyway, the movie starts with two cops in a relationship finding out that one of them is going to be a mother, and the other one is the father. Then the father gets shot in a drug store (lol retirony) and the lady cop chases two guys into a warehouse that holds the titular demonic toys who are:

This Jack-In-the-Box who attacks people by strangling them with a tentacle arm and then biting them.

this evil teddy bear,

Babie Oopsie Daisy, who is honestly the most annoying character in the movie. She's a foul mouthed evil baby toy that kills people, and that's it, that's the joke. Well Chuckie worked, I guess.

Also there's this robot toy who can shoot real lasers. He is obviously MVP of this tag-team of evil toys, but the movie doesn't seem to realize it because he gets the least screen time.

Characters besides the cop and the deadmeat character include:

this schlubby security guard who is watching The Puppet Master, a different Full Moon Features film on TV. I think he might represent the kind of person who watches these movies. SPOILERS:He dies.

Also there's this rebel fried chicken delivery man who gets called by the security guard for some late-night chicken. He survives to the end of the movie.

So anyway, for about half of the movie it's kind of unclear why the toys are coming to life, but it turns out a demon baby was buried on the site of the warehouse by trick or treaters 65 years before the events of the movie. 

Yes, really.

 It is no less confusing in context.

Throughout most of the movie the demonic entity appears this way

But at the end he reveals his true form as a community theatre version of the devil.

So there's a big shoot out with a pistol and a shotgun with the toys which really should have been the movie's climax, and then the lady cop gets tied up and the rebel delivery boy has to fight the bear while the devil tries to make her give birth to a body that he can use to access our mortal plane of existence. But her future child's spirit comes and saves her, so it all ends happily via Deus Ex Machina.

Also because her future child is a child, and the demon's alternate form is a child, the climax is two kids playfighting.

So this movie just felt kind of weird and pointless. The stakes never seem high or important, the movie stops halfway through to drop a boatload of exposition via demonchild, and the toys seem like sidenotes in their own movie. A character gets introduced and then killed off just to lead someone through the airvents in the warehouse. It kept me entertained for 90 minutes, I guess.

lee4hmz

One thing I've learned from watching MST3k and The Cinema Snob is that, when it comes to B-movies and exploitation films, titles always lie. And if they don't lie, they overpromise, which is still kind of a lie.

Odradek

So I want to talk about my feelings on speculative realism, so I decided to do it here.

So I realize SR is kind of a controversial term, because only one of the four thinkers associated with it feels like associating themselves with the term anymore, but w/e.

Meillassoux is a breath of fresh air for French philosophy, and probably the best argument for the whole Badiou craze not being a total failure. I disagree with most of what he says in After Finitude, but after the long nightmare of terrible writing and inbred thinking(not dissing continental thought entirely, just stating the facts) it's nice to have someone with clear propositions you can disagree with without finding out that thinker X is always already more complicated than your vulgar caricature. As for the Divine Inexistence, I'm looking forward to when it finally gets released and translated. The book looks to be one of the best things written on religion this century and one of the only original things as well. If it has one flaw, it's that it's very Christianized. Meillassoux doesn't really talk about what the Buddhist, Muslim, or assorted other traditions might have to say to his fourfold dichotomy of positions on God. That said, I haven't read the full book so I, like everyone except Badiou and Harman, don't know for sure.

Iain Hamilton Grant is okay, I guess? He's very hard to read, if very erudite, and he could really stand to not be quite so dry. I do respect that he's doing what he's doing and doesn't care what anyone else thinks, but I wish he did it better.

Ray Brassier is good, if stuck in a bit of a rage-filled teenage 19th century rut. That said, his work in helping the reception of Laruelle and Sellars to Continental philosophy is invaluable. I really wish he would just abandon that fascist idiot Nick Land, though.

Graham Harman is a very good writer and salesman, but weak on the argument side of things. As far as his personal behavior goes, I don't think he's as bad as people say he is, but among his followers, Levi Bryant has issues and Tim Morton is crazy. Ian Bogost is okay, though. Good essay on OOO here

Also the shadow war between Brassier and Harman via Laruelle needs to end. Really.

Aliroz

Hey, Odra, I think you might like Humanism Beyond Italy by Albert Rabil.

Sincere, here, I thought it was clear and based in decent understanding.