The Courtroom of the Heapers' Hangout

Sredni Vashtar · 2013-07-18 13:57:13

*stares indifferently; looks to Yarrun*

Is he really this stupid?

Yarrun XIX · 2013-07-18 14:09:52

Not really. He just likes fighting battles that he can't win.

You forgot about the bottles of acid that I carry!

He also likes to steal from the alchemist stash that I've repeatedly told him not to steal from.

Sredni Vashtar · 2013-07-18 14:14:02

*sigh*

*neatly slits throat*

Sredni Vashtar · 2013-07-18 14:14:58

...goddamnit, Pulver. Again?

Yarrun XIX · 2013-07-18 14:47:07

*dies; sort of*

Yeah, there's also the fact that I technically don't exist and can't be killed through typical means.

Good thing you never got that lawsuit filed.

Shut up.

Salix Babylonika · 2013-07-18 14:58:00

I object on the grounds that I had an alternate persona before it was cool.

Yarrun XIX · 2013-07-18 15:05:56

Excuse you, but I've been around for quite a while, thank you very much!

I ran health potions in the great battle between Lord Cetacea and Hellephant! I've suffered through the shipping wars. I'm almost as ancient as they come!

Miss Miko Mayonegg · 2013-07-18 15:11:37

In which it is revealed that all of you are Tnophelia.

Sredni Vashtar · 2013-07-18 15:15:57

I object on the grounds that I arguably predate this entire forum and the thread that spawned it.

Salix Babylonika · 2013-07-18 15:52:48

so did I

Tre · 2013-07-18 18:43:30

Ditto.

Quip · 2013-07-18 18:44:44

Me too-- wait.

Um... Never mind.

Miss Miko Mayonegg · 2013-07-18 19:20:24

Not me though.

Imipolex G · 2013-07-18 22:17:02

I wanted an alternate persona but it wouldn't work

Yarrun XIX · 2013-07-18 22:21:03

I plead the 20th

There's no way that applies here.

No, you dunce. The 20th chapter. Of Matthew. Verses 1 through 16.

Imipolex G · 2013-07-18 22:21:58

The last will be first, and the first will be last.

Princess Alice · 2013-07-18 22:31:35

*slowly wakes up at the bench*

Huh? There are still people here? ...What case was this again?

Yarrun XIX · 2013-07-18 22:39:41

The case of me being able to loot that unconscious guy's pockets without getting stabbed by Knife Guy.

...vs the State?

Justice4243 · 2013-07-19 18:40:49

criminalscum · 2013-07-19 18:48:34

Since I have not seen anyone mention a jury, I will take it upon myself to perform this duty.

Yarrun XIX said:
Miss Centie! Miss Centie! I demand the right to exist! Arthur vs. Yarrun! Arthur vs. Yarrun!

Shut up, Arthur!

GUILTY.

Yarrun XIX said:
The case of me being able to loot that unconscious guy's pockets without getting stabbed by Knife Guy.

...vs the State?

ALSO GUILTY.

Mo' said:
I object on the grounds that I had an alternate persona before it was cool.

Sustained and also you're GUILTY.

Central Avenue said:
*slowly wakes up at the bench*

Huh? There are still people here? ...What case was this again?

The case of You're Guilty vs. You're Superguilty.

Imipolex G · 2013-07-19 18:50:14

whew, I escaped!

Yarrun XIX · 2013-07-19 18:56:48

^^ NONE OF THESE ARE CRIMINAL LAWSUITS; YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO RULE IN FAVOR OF THE PLAINTIFF OR THE DEFENDANT; THIS IS THE WORST COURTROOM EVER.

Fifth worst.

Oh, yeah. We haven't forgotten about you, Arizona.

criminalscum · 2013-07-19 18:58:44

Yarrun XIX said:
^^ NONE OF THESE ARE CRIMINAL LAWSUITS; YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO RULE IN FAVOR OF THE PLAINTIFF OR THE DEFENDANT; THIS IS THE WORST COURTROOM EVER.

Fifth worst.

Oh, yeah. We haven't forgotten about you, Arizona.

How do you know? They could be guilty of something!

Justice4243 · 2013-07-19 19:00:03

http://www.southparkstudios.com/clips/151313/everyone-vs-everyone

Yarrun XIX · 2013-07-19 19:09:32

Alright, if anybody's usurping the judge and throwing out jail sentences, I'm DOING IT FIRST!

Everybody else is guilty of not letting me steal that guy's wallet, and they will go to jail or let me frigging steal it already.

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