Nicolas Cage movies

Alduin

Man, am I the only one who makes a distinction between "movies with Nicolas Cage in them" (such as Stolen and Season of the Witch) and "Nicolas Cage movies" (like both National Treasures and the first Ghost Rider)? I mean, there's like a sliding scale of "Caginess" I have in my head, that I adjust for every Cage movie I watch. What is Caginess, anyway?

Viani

Caginess is the imperial measurement of Cage, as opposed to Gigacages, Teracages, Kilocages, Millicages.

Viani

Viani said:

Caginess is the imperial measurement of Cage, as opposed to Gigacages, Teracages, Kilocages, Millicages.

Also known as KBEES, MBEES, GBEES and mBEES

Alduin

So movies like Stolen would be around only 27 kilocages, while uniquely Cagey things like National Treasure and Con Air would be measured in gigacages or even teracages?

Viani

Yeah, you just add the amount of scenes that the Cage is in. If he is on the cover of the movie, multiply it by 2. If his character is the first name listed in the credits, multiply it by another 2. So Scenes x 2 x 2 = Cages.

Alduin

No no no. As I said, movie where Nic Cage appears =/= Nicolas Cage movie. For a movie to be a Nicolas Cage movie, it has to have Cage acting...like Cage. 

I can't find words to describe Cage's acting. He defies description, probably while shouting FUUUUUUUUUCK

One-Winged Eagle

Sorcerer's Apprentice?

Alduin

I don't remember him being Cagey enough in that movie. It was mostly Nic Cage being the (unfortunately) level-headed teacher of some dumb college nerd. He did have a tragic past tormented by a lost love though, which is pretty Cagey in my book.

Previous Calica

Oh my god, Con Air.

Nic Cage's Southern accent in that one was so bad.

Viani

There was no role Cagey enough to consider Cage Cage.

Justice4243

Section42L

Obligatory:

lee4hmz

LET ME TELL YOU ABOUT NICOLAS CAGE:

Mr. Darcy

"You WILL be Nicolas Cage!" /MST3K

Mr. Darcy

"You WILL be Nicolas Cage!" /MST3K

Alduin

I wonder what the ultimate Cage movie would be like.

Fossilmaiden

It would be about Nicolas Cage playing a down on his luck actor called Nicolas Cage. Unable to find work, he would enter himself in a Cage Fighting tournament. His opponents would be Kage, Johnny Cage, Chris Palko, and Power Man. The movie would be scored by John Cage.

Alduin

Fossilmaiden said:

It would be about Nicolas Cage playing a down on his luck actor called Nicolas Cage. Unable to find work, he would enter himself in a Cage Fighting tournament. His opponents would be Kage, Johnny Cage, Chris Palko, and Power Man. The movie would be scored by John Cage.

I can do one better.

Fossilmaiden said:

It would be about Nicolas Cage playing a down on his luck actor called Nicolas Cage. Mafia bosses would kidnap his daughter. They would free her, on the condition that he would enter himself in a Cage Fighting game across the country. He would be given half a month to hunt down and kill Kage, Johnny Cage, Chris Palko, and Power Man across the U.S using a magic cell phone the mafia bosses gave him and the power of running with a bad haircut. Also, he would be constantly high on drugs to allow for his violent mood swings every 20 or so minutes and stoner-ish demeanor. And the movie would be scored by John Cage.

Imipolex G

15

Bunny

Just for the record, Vampire's Kiss is a totally awesome movie

Seriously

Vriska

*dreamy Vriska grin*

8ut seriously I do find Nicolas Cage movies to 8e quite entertaining.

Sredni Vashtar

I liked Con Air... but mainly because of Buscemi, Malkovich and Cusack. Also the camp. Cage was meh.

Nic Cage is perfectly capable of good acting work, but for some reason he just has lousy taste in projects. It's a bit sad.

Previous Calica

Didn't he have a huge money problem?

Alduin

Nicolas Cage is one of Hollywood's highest-paid actors, earning $40 million in 2009 according to Forbes Magazine.

???

Obā-san

Nicolas Cage is one of Hollywood's highest-paid actors, earning $40 million in 2009 according to Forbes Magazine.

???

On July 14, 2009, the Internal Revenue Service filed documents in New Orleans in connection with a federal tax lien against property owned by Cage in Louisiana, concerning unpaid federal taxes. The IRS alleges that Cage failed to pay over $6.2 million in federal income tax for the year 2007.[31] In addition, the Internal Revenue Service has another lien for more than $350,000 in unpaid taxes dating from 2002 to 2004.[32] Cage filed a $20 million lawsuit on October 16, 2009, against his business manager, Samuel J. Levin, alleging negligence and fraud.[33] The lawsuit states that Levin "had failed to pay taxes when they were due and had placed [Cage] in speculative and risky real estate investments 'resulting in (the actor) suffering catastrophic losses'."[33] Cage is also facing separate lawsuits from East West Bank[34] and Red Curb Investments for unpaid, multimillion dollar loans.

Samuel Levin filed a counter-complaint and responded to the lawsuit in a filing stating that he warned Cage that he was living beyond his means and urged him to spend less. Levin's filing states that "instead of listening to Levin, cross-defendant Cage (Coppola) spent most of his free time shopping for high ticket purchases, and wound up with 15 personal residences", Levin's complaint continued: "Likewise, Levin advised Coppola against buying a Gulfstream jet, against buying and owning a flotilla of yachts, against buying and owning a squadron of Rolls Royces, against buying millions of dollars in jewelry and art."[35]

Imipolex G

idiot

Alduin

He needs to make a movie about that.