I don't understand why how I feel about myself is acceptable fodder for dumb jokes.
Like yes I would categorize myself as "genderqueer" if I had to pick something.
I don't understand why that's a problem. I'm not even asking anyone to do anything. I don't even ask that people change their pronouns really (which is the archetypal "annoying" thing that we all apparently do), and I would really just like to be able to bring it up without being made fun of.
Like this is the internet, I do not have to worry about complexities like presenting and avoiding physical persecution here. I am literally just asking to be respected.
This isn't really a unique situation--to Miko or even this website--but when you post things like that I feel like I'm being made fun of and I don't understand what your intent is in posting them if not to rile me and a handful of other people up.
I kind of thought we were cool now, are we not? I'd rather know.
I don't understand why how I feel about myself is acceptable fodder for dumb jokes[...]
I was tastelessly poking fun at a certain view of a certain topic by certain people and I'm sorry. You would not be the kind of person that came to mind. I think of you as a girl, generally, because it seems to me like you'd rather be a girl, which means you probably fit well into the "trans" category. I'm not bothered by people being genderqueer, although I am honestly annoyed when I'm continually asked to switch pronouns back and forth for someone over a long period, and I am honestly annoyed when someone genderqueer equates this identification with living as a trans person, and these were the things that inspired the unwise post you see above. Yes Jane, I really am okay with you and I don't like fighting.
I don't understand why how I feel about myself is acceptable fodder for dumb jokes[...]
I was tastelessly poking fun at a certain view of a certain topic by certain people and I'm sorry. You would not be the kind of person that came to mind. I think of you as a girl, generally, because it seems to me like you'd rather be a girl, which means you probably fit well into the "trans" category. I'm not bothered by people being genderqueer, although I am honestly annoyed when I'm continually asked to switch pronouns back and forth for someone over a long period, and I am honestly annoyed when someone genderqueer equates this identification with living as a trans person, and these were the things that inspired the unwise post you see above. Yes Jane, I really am okay with you and I don't like fighting.
ok
sorry.
I mean I suppose the whole truth of the matter is that I'm mostly still figuring myself out and rarely ask for advice because I'm afraid of being jumped on for saying something "wrong" or mock-worthy.
I sort of actively avoid thinking about my own gender identity much because it's an uncomfortable subject and I really have no idea if I plan to transition or what. It's all very up in the air and my experience with the online trans community has been that uncertainty means you're a fake, liar, and general terrible person (I have had people say this to my, if you will, virtual face).
Maybe that sort of hostility is, at least, understandable given the challenges that out transfolk face on a day-to-day basis, and perhaps even my being emotional is rather trivial in comparison, but that doesn't make it not hurt.
And at the end of the day all I really want is to not hurt anyone and not be hurt in turn.
Switching gender identification on a regular basis.
Switching gender identification isn't a thing I consciously do, it's a thing that happens to me, and I'm pretty sure Anonus is the same way. What was tedious for me was logging in/out when my gender identification changed, and pronounshit isn't that important to me most of the time so it doesn't matter.
And as far as I can tell feeling like a boy sometimes and a girl sometimes is only different from feeling like a girl all the time because it means I know I'll probably still be unhappy if I do physically transition.
Sorry that trying to use the right pronouns is so inconvenient for you though.
I sort of actively avoid thinking about my own gender identity much because it's an uncomfortable subject and I really have no idea if I plan to transition or what. It's all very up in the air and my experience with the online trans community has been that uncertainty means you're a fake, liar, and general terrible person (I have had people say this to my, if you will, virtual face).
Sounds like those privileged little shits over at /lgbt/. I was uncertain for a long time too, because when I was growing up any talk of gender-variance was derided by most peers and discouraged by adults. The way a person is raised unfortunately has an impact on how they form their identity.
Sorry that trying to use the right pronouns is so inconvenient for you though.
It's not only inconvenient to keep up with, it's also personally annoying to me.
You see, my gender identity has been continually attacked by people irl for a few years, ever since I first said "I am a girl" and believed it. Disrespect, harassment, confusion, and even indignation, by other people at my presentation are all common things in my everyday life. Clerks, food servers, receptionists, doctors, nurses, family members, people passing me on the street... all just because I dress like a girl and call myself a girl, without looking enough like one! For years, I couldn't even get myself on the basic hormones to start changing my male body, and I had to live with a girl who passed and lived my dream, and the issues surrounding this ultimately destroyed our relationship, slowly, painfully, albeit among a slew of other long-standing relationship issues. This experience has been extremely frustrating. This isn't an excuse, but part of the reason I make insensitive posts here about this topic is that it's me taking out this frustration on an 'acceptable target.'
I sort of actively avoid thinking about my own gender identity much because it's an uncomfortable subject and I really have no idea if I plan to transition or what. It's all very up in the air and my experience with the online trans community has been that uncertainty means you're a fake, liar, and general terrible person (I have had people say this to my, if you will, virtual face).
Sounds like those privileged little shits over at /lgbt/. I was uncertain for a long time too, because when I was growing up any talk of gender-variance was derided by most peers and discouraged by adults. The way a person is raised unfortunately has an impact on how they form their identity.
I don't go to 4chan. Mostly been redditors and the odd tumblrite or twitter person.
You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
Switching gender identification isn't a thing I consciously do, it's a thing that happens to me,
I never actually believed in things like this. It's a conscious decision to say "I am a boy/girl."
Not to point out the obvious, but...if it were as simple as getting to choose what gender you feel like you are, why on earth would anyone choose to be transgender??
Not to point out the obvious, but...if it were as simple as getting to choose what gender you feel like you are, why on earth would anyone choose to be transgender??
You're right. I just can't imagine this core sense of sexual identity ever really changes. But to say "I am a boy/girl" is a conscious thing. Even if your thoughts and feelings shift, your gender presentation is upheld by *you.* At times in my life, I was okay-ish with being a boy. At other times, I couldn't stand it. My core sense of being ultimately a female never changed, though. I doubt this can change.
a lot of people say the exact thing about trans people in general
Yeah, they do, like I said in my post. I've taken out that frustration on others who claim an identity like mine but don't *live* it. I hope this explains my behavior, even if it doesn't excuse it.
a lot of people say the exact thing about trans people in general
Yeah, they do, like I said in my post. I've taken out that frustration on others who claim an identity like mine but don't *live* it. I hope this explains my behavior, even if it doesn't excuse it.
you need to really think about why that's incredibly rude and why several of us are incredibly upset at you
there are two things going on here: the feeling, and the articulation of the feeling. the feeling itself is not a choice, but the articulation is.
i would say that expecting people not to articulate it simply because you find it inconvenient is kinda douchey
They can if they want to. It's just fucking annoying, is all. It's like if my religious beliefs changed every day and I always made a point to let everyone know. Is it surprising when they start to get tired of it?
You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
Miko, there's something important I need to draw your attention to, because I don't know if you're aware of it:
The things you're saying about genderfluid people are making them feel the same way you do when others put down trans people.
More people have said that and been killed than there are thorium decay products.
Just to be clear, I'm only bothering to defend myself because I don't wanna lose friends and hurt people I like from a misunderstanding. I really hate having to do this instead of just clearing out of the thread. I wasn't expecting a big discussion here, or any response at all, actually. By "not living it" I mean I refuse to belief that genderqueer tendencies are similar to the persistent frustration of being transsexual. One thing is a lot more painful than the other. Being transsexual has fundamentally impacted my identity, my experiences, my actions, and my life. Being genderqueer doesn't even come close to that. So when genderqueers say "I'm like you" my first thought is 'ugh, no you're not,' and I may take out frustration on them.
There's a lot wrong with that. Alternatively: At the very least, even if they don't understand you 1:1, you're not understanding/being empathetic to them 1:1 in the same turn, leading to stuff like this.
The things you're saying about genderfluid people are making them feel the same way you do when others put down trans people.
I'm aware, and it's part of my, umm, hangups. People have the very same feelings about being a fundamentalist far-right Christian, or any very big part of their identity. Saying this could potentially invalidate myself, I'm aware. Oh well.
I'm interested, actually. To me the internet is not Serious Business, so speak up! Link me some stuff.
Well, OK. The etymology of witch is a bit uncertain and subject to debate, but Old English had two words, the masculine 'wicca' and the feminine 'wicce'.
Only one of the two is voluntary, generally; that's not a good comparison.
One's religious beliefs are involuntary in the same sense.
also idk about 'in the same sense' but it does perturb me a bit that people often wheel out religious beliefs as something you 'choose'. If i believe something it's because afaik it's true, and i was brought up to be a Christian.
Having said all of which mockery of genderqueer people, although i've been unsure about applying that label to myself, make me personally uncomfortable and i don't feel that self-perception in relation to gender, a confusing and multilayered subject, is all that similar to religious affiliation, also a confusing, multilayered subject
You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
Only one of the two is voluntary, generally; that's not a good comparison.
One's religious beliefs are involuntary in the same sense.
also idk about 'in the same sense' but it does perturb me a bit that people often wheel out religious beliefs as something you 'choose'. If i believe something it's because afaik it's true, and i was brought up to be a Christian.
Having said all of which mockery of genderqueer people, although i've been unsure about applying that label to myself, make me personally uncomfortable and i don't feel that self-perception in relation to gender, a confusing and multilayered subject, is all that similar to religious affiliation, also a confusing, multilayered subject
I have thoughts but don't want to derail (in my eyes), so PM me if you're curious.
I have no idea what just happened here and I kinda feel like I ought to read all these 30 or so new posts before commenting but I have a hunch that this stuff has been going on long enough that I am going to demand a plaintext and plain language explanation/summary of what just happened.
I have no idea what just happened here and I kinda feel like I ought to read all these 30 or so new posts before commenting but I have a hunch that this stuff has been going on long enough that I am going to demand a plaintext and plain language explanation/summary of what just happened.
If you don't like my post, pretend that my post is filled with pictures of Bill Clinton pointing at pixelated polyhedrons and ignore it.
The story has often been anthologized, and has been published more than once as a short book in its own right. The story was adapted as an animated short in 1965 and as a live-action feature film in the Soviet Union in 1975. The same year, animator Chuck Jones adapted the story for an animated TV special in the United States.[2]
The story follows the experiences of a young mongoose named Rikki-Tikki-Tavi (for his chattering vocalizations) after he is adopted into a British family residing in India, as a pet and as protection against venomous cobra snakes. After becoming friendly with some of the other creatures inhabiting the garden, Rikki is warned of two cobras Nag and Nagaina, who are angered by the family's presence on their territory. Accordingly Nag enters the house's bathroom before dawn but is attacked by Rikki. The struggle that ensues awakens the human family and the father kills Nag with a shotgun.
The grieving Nagaina attempts revenge against Rikki's humans, cornering them as they take breakfast on an outdoor veranda. While Nagaina is distracted by a female tailor bird Rikki destroys the cobra's unhatched brood of eggs except for one. He carries it to where Nagaina is threatening to bite the child Teddy while his parents watch helplessly. Nagaina, enraged, recovers her egg, but is pursued by Rikki-Tikki away from the house to the cobra's underground nest where an unseen final battle takes place. Rikki emerges triumphant from the hole declaring Nagaina dead. His subsequent role is to protect the family by keeping the garden free from any future intrusion by snakes.
We maintain protocols to ensure the security and confidentiality of your personal information. We have physical security in our building, passwords to protect databases, compliance audits, and virus/intrusion detection software. Within our practice, access to your information is limited to those who need it to perform their jobs.
At the offices of ___________, we are committed to treating and using protected health information about you responsibly. This Notice of Privacy Policies describes the personal information we collect, and how and when we use or disclose that information. This Notice is effective April 14, 2003, and applies to all protected health information as defined in federal regulations.
My girlfriend (22f) and I (24m) are having a disagreement about a picture.
I met my girlfriend, Sam, 8 months ago at a house party and we've been pretty much inseparable since then. She's witty, intelligent, funny and gorgeous and we are almost the perfect couple.
The only issue I've been having recently is a framed picture she keeps over her bed. It's of an older gentleman lying in bed with a scowl on his face. She lives with roommates and I live alone so we spend most of our time together at my place and I've only been in her room a couple times so I've never really brought it up.
For a while I just figured it was a relative of some sort (Sam is African American but this is a picture of a white guy) until recently I met her extended family at a birthday party for her cousin. On the way back I asked who the picture in her bedroom is of, since it's not anyone I met at the party. She started laughing at me and explained that the picture is of some apparently famous philosopher guy named Slavoj Zijek (I don't know if that's spelled right) and she doesn't know him. WTF. We started arguing about it, I said it was weird to keep pictures of random people in your bedroom and she said it was somehow 'pomo', I don't know what that means, her major is philosophy and mine is computer science.
TL;DR: girlfriend keeps picture of a philosopher on her bedroom wall. I'm weirded out and kind of jealous that this guy is apparently so important to her that she has a random picture of him above her bed. Am I overreacting though?
My girlfriend (22f) and I (24m) are having a disagreement about a picture.
I met my girlfriend, Sam, 8 months ago at a house party and we've been pretty much inseparable since then. She's witty, intelligent, funny and gorgeous and we are almost the perfect couple.
The only issue I've been having recently is a framed picture she keeps over her bed. It's of an older gentleman lying in bed with a scowl on his face. She lives with roommates and I live alone so we spend most of our time together at my place and I've only been in her room a couple times so I've never really brought it up.
For a while I just figured it was a relative of some sort (Sam is African American but this is a picture of a white guy) until recently I met her extended family at a birthday party for her cousin. On the way back I asked who the picture in her bedroom is of, since it's not anyone I met at the party. She started laughing at me and explained that the picture is of some apparently famous philosopher guy named Slavoj Zijek (I don't know if that's spelled right) and she doesn't know him. WTF. We started arguing about it, I said it was weird to keep pictures of random people in your bedroom and she said it was somehow 'pomo', I don't know what that means, her major is philosophy and mine is computer science.
TL;DR: girlfriend keeps picture of a philosopher on her bedroom wall. I'm weirded out and kind of jealous that this guy is apparently so important to her that she has a random picture of him above her bed. Am I overreacting though?
You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
Comments
Switching gender identification on a regular basis.
Switching gender identification isn't a thing I consciously do, it's a thing that happens to me, and I'm pretty sure Anonus is the same way. What was tedious for me was logging in/out when my gender identification changed, and pronounshit isn't that important to me most of the time so it doesn't matter.
Well, OK. The etymology of witch is a bit uncertain and subject to debate, but Old English had two words, the masculine 'wicca' and the feminine 'wicce'.
But what do I know. I am less offended by various things that offend various other people here.
"Rikki-Tikki-Tavi" is a short story in The Jungle Book (1894) by Rudyard Kipling about the adventures of a valiant young mongoose.[1]
The story has often been anthologized, and has been published more than once as a short book in its own right. The story was adapted as an animated short in 1965 and as a live-action feature film in the Soviet Union in 1975. The same year, animator Chuck Jones adapted the story for an animated TV special in the United States.[2]
Plot summary
Rikki-Tikki-Tavi in Chuck Jones' animated film
The story follows the experiences of a young mongoose
named Rikki-Tikki-Tavi (for his chattering vocalizations) after he is
adopted into a British family residing in India, as a pet and as
protection against venomous cobra snakes. After becoming friendly with
some of the other creatures inhabiting the garden, Rikki is warned of
two cobras
Nag and Nagaina, who are angered by the family's presence on their
territory. Accordingly Nag enters the house's bathroom before dawn but
is attacked by Rikki. The struggle that ensues awakens the human family
and the father kills Nag with a shotgun.
The grieving Nagaina attempts revenge against Rikki's humans,
cornering them as they take breakfast on an outdoor veranda. While
Nagaina is distracted by a female tailor bird
Rikki destroys the cobra's unhatched brood of eggs except for one. He
carries it to where Nagaina is threatening to bite the child Teddy while
his parents watch helplessly. Nagaina, enraged, recovers her egg, but
is pursued by Rikki-Tikki away from the house to the cobra's underground
nest where an unseen final battle takes place. Rikki emerges triumphant
from the hole declaring Nagaina dead. His subsequent role is to protect
the family by keeping the garden free from any future intrusion by
snakes.
We maintain protocols to ensure the security and confidentiality of your personal information. We have physical security in our building, passwords to protect databases, compliance audits, and virus/intrusion detection software. Within our practice, access to your information is limited to those who need it to perform their jobs.
At the offices of ___________, we are committed to treating and using protected health information about you responsibly. This Notice of Privacy Policies describes the personal information we collect, and how and when we use or disclose that information. This Notice is effective April 14, 2003, and applies to all protected health information as defined in federal regulations.
My girlfriend (22f) and I (24m) are having a disagreement about a picture.
I met my girlfriend, Sam, 8 months ago at a house party and we've been pretty much inseparable since then. She's witty, intelligent, funny and gorgeous and we are almost the perfect couple.
The only issue I've been having recently is a framed picture she keeps over her bed. It's of an older gentleman lying in bed with a scowl on his face. She lives with roommates and I live alone so we spend most of our time together at my place and I've only been in her room a couple times so I've never really brought it up.
For a while I just figured it was a relative of some sort (Sam is African American but this is a picture of a white guy) until recently I met her extended family at a birthday party for her cousin. On the way back I asked who the picture in her bedroom is of, since it's not anyone I met at the party. She started laughing at me and explained that the picture is of some apparently famous philosopher guy named Slavoj Zijek (I don't know if that's spelled right) and she doesn't know him. WTF. We started arguing about it, I said it was weird to keep pictures of random people in your bedroom and she said it was somehow 'pomo', I don't know what that means, her major is philosophy and mine is computer science.
TL;DR: girlfriend keeps picture of a philosopher on her bedroom wall. I'm weirded out and kind of jealous that this guy is apparently so important to her that she has a random picture of him above her bed. Am I overreacting though?
LET'S DOXX TRANNIES lololol