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w ketchup resists the tyranny of depraved leftist intellectuals

Comments

  • CalicaCalica
    Sup bitches, witches, Haters, and trolls.
    also the most bizarre fuckin' godwin i've ever seen
  • Princess AlicePrincess Alice
    You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
    I'm gonna go out on a limb and guess that stuff tastes worse than watery elementary-school-cafeteria ketchup
  • FossilmaidenFossilmaiden
    image Wee yea erra chs hymmnos mea.
    "Reagan won the Cold War"
  • TachyonTachyon
    edited 2014-06-01 13:07:37
    imagei will watch the heck outta this pumpkin patch
    but CA
    W Ketchup About Page said:

    W Ketchup avoids the harsh, vinegary taste of some of its competitors, and instead blends its ingredients into a smooth, rich flavor that enhances any meal.  W Ketchup also offers a healthier alternative with new, Organic W Ketchup™ made from only the most natural ingredients.

    W Ketchup in the home, outside, or at a restaurant signals an individual who isn’t afraid to take a stand and exercise the right to have the right brand of ketchup.  W Ketchup breaks the ketchup monopoly to give Americans a choice.  W Ketchup is America’s ketchup.

  • Princess AlicePrincess Alice
    You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
    Offering an organic version of your Conservatism-themed ketchup just leaves me wondering who the hell your target audience is.
  • TachyonTachyon
    imagei will watch the heck outta this pumpkin patch
    It's populism-themed.  GMO products and artificial ingredients are scary and sinister, not the good old fashioned American way of doing things.
  • AnonusAnonus
    I've learned to tolerate drama...except on the boat
    That page mentions the ketchup duopoly

    Always weird to see people acknowledge Hunt's, somehow

    Also: they make not-America sound like so much fun
  • glennmagusharveyglennmagusharvey
    Fossilmaiden said:

    "Reagan won the Cold War"

    and all he got was an airport named after him
  • TachyonTachyon
    imagei will watch the heck outta this pumpkin patch
    a disgrace is what it is

    where's your gratitude America
  • Salix BabylonikaSalix Babylonika
    https://i.imgur.com/IoGc2jA.jpg
    it's not like there was, for a long time, a completely arbitrary and masturbatory movement to have Reagan replace Franklin Roosevelt on the dime.
  • CalicaCalica
    Sup bitches, witches, Haters, and trolls.
    Central Avenue said:

    Offering an organic version of your Conservatism-themed ketchup just leaves me wondering who the hell your target audience is.

    well Whole Foods apparently has a lot of Republican customers actually
  • Obā-sanObā-san

    Central Avenue said:

    Offering an organic version of your Conservatism-themed ketchup just leaves me wondering who the hell your target audience is.

    the whole conservativism thing is rather obviously a joke

  • FossilmaidenFossilmaiden
    image Wee yea erra chs hymmnos mea.
    Burgundy Queen said:

    it's not like there was, for a long time, a completely arbitrary and masturbatory movement to have Reagan replace Franklin Roosevelt on the dime.

    Well, we can't have a Democrat on the dime now, can we?
  • Obā-sanObā-san

    dimeocrat
  • FossilmaidenFossilmaiden
    edited 2014-06-01 13:40:58
    image Wee yea erra chs hymmnos mea.
    Yon Assassin said:

    Central Avenue said:

    Offering an organic version of your Conservatism-themed ketchup just leaves me wondering who the hell your target audience is.

    the whole conservativism thing is rather obviously a joke

    It isn't. The whole reason the ketchup was made was because John Kerry is married to Teresa Heinz, and therefore if you buy Heinz, you support John Kerry.
  • Princess AlicePrincess Alice
    You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
    Yon Assassin said:

    Central Avenue said:

    Offering an organic version of your Conservatism-themed ketchup just leaves me wondering who the hell your target audience is.

    the whole conservativism thing is rather obviously a joke

    somehow i doubt that, given the ketchup's origin
  • Princess AlicePrincess Alice
    You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
    Yeah, what Alice said.
  • CalicaCalica
    Sup bitches, witches, Haters, and trolls.
    Burgundy Queen said:

    it's not like there was, for a long time, a completely arbitrary and masturbatory movement to have Reagan replace Franklin Roosevelt on the dime.

    when the ten trillion dollar platinum coin thing was a thing the most common suggestion for a face on it was Reagan's because lol
  • Obā-sanObā-san

    ...i was so completely sure that this had to be satire
  • CalicaCalica
    Sup bitches, witches, Haters, and trolls.
    Yon Assassin said:

    ...i was so completely sure that this had to be satire

    2004 was a weird time, man
  • Obā-sanObā-san

    that marketing copy is like

    i

    poes law
  • Princess AlicePrincess Alice
    You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
    I know, right? It's hilarious.
  • Obā-sanObā-san

    W Ketchup in the home, outside, or at a restaurant signals an individual who isn’t afraid to take a stand and exercise the right to have the right brand of ketchup.  W Ketchup breaks the ketchup monopoly to give Americans a choice.  W Ketchup is America’s ketchup.
    this sounds exactly like something Stephen Colbert would say.
  • CalicaCalica
    Sup bitches, witches, Haters, and trolls.
    where do you think Stephen Colbert got the idea for his character?
  • KlinotaxisKlinotaxis
    kill living beings
    reading ketchup bottles
  • lee4hmzlee4hmz
    ⚠ THIS MACHINE KILLS FASCISTS
    lololololol

    All the people that this would have bothered just bought generic ketchup from Wally World or Turrget and called it a day. 
  • CalicaCalica
    Sup bitches, witches, Haters, and trolls.
    And yet ads for W Ketchup were everywhere over the internet back in 2004
  • glennmagusharveyglennmagusharvey
    in japan this ketchup is on sale buy one get one free
  • CalicaCalica
    Sup bitches, witches, Haters, and trolls.
    glennmagusharvey said:

    in japan this ketchup is on sale buy one get one free

    now i'm imagining it as cyclonejoker-themed ketchup
  • lee4hmzlee4hmz
    ⚠ THIS MACHINE KILLS FASCISTS
    glennmagusharvey said:

    in japan this ketchup is on sale buy one get one free

    wwwwwwwwww
  • Miss Miko MayoneggMiss Miko Mayonegg
    More people have said that and been killed than there are thorium decay products.
    I come from a family of Republicans, some of whom eat organic food. You might be surprised. (*re-asserts, as if it were necessary at all, that she has ZERO affiliation with the Republican party or just about anything it represents*)
  • Obā-sanObā-san

    wait, you're A REPUBLICAN!?!?!? :O
  • Imipolex GImipolex G
    Touch the cow. Do it now.
    Miko is a Canadian, your argument is invalid
  • Obā-sanObā-san

    A REPUBLICANADIAN!?!?!?!?? :O :O :O
  • Imipolex GImipolex G
    Touch the cow. Do it now.
    lolz
  • Miss Miko MayoneggMiss Miko Mayonegg
    More people have said that and been killed than there are thorium decay products.
    I voted once in my life and it was for the American Green Party.
  • glennmagusharveyglennmagusharvey
    lee4hmz said:

    glennmagusharvey said:

    in japan this ketchup is on sale buy one get one free

    wwwwwwwwww
    you want buy one get one thousand and twenty-three free?
  • AlirozAliroz
    ...And even when your hope is gone
    move along, move along, just to make it through
    (2015 self)
    Yon Assassin said:

    wait, you're A REPUBLICAN!?!?!? :O


    Ugh! What is it with you heapers! This is why I don't feel like I belong here.
  • Obā-sanObā-san

    the joke was that Miko is obviously not a republican and she just said that she was most certainly not a republican
  • AlirozAliroz
    edited 2014-06-02 15:17:50
    ...And even when your hope is gone
    move along, move along, just to make it through
    (2015 self)
    And the joke is that I am overly reacting to something not reaction-worthy (the lack of capitalization on the word, "wait".)

    (Note: when I'm actually upset, in don't use exclamation points very much. Also, I would never use Ugh as its own sentence. It is always, "Ugh, yaddayadda yadda.", because I must write in complete sentences. Sorry that my self-parody is so hard to distinguish from when I am truly upset).

    We need a font for " I am not being serious and am just doing bad overacting".

    Stupid text not conveying tone very well.
  • Obā-sanObā-san

    We need a font for " I am not being serious and am just doing bad overacting".
    Like this?
  • AlirozAliroz
    ...And even when your hope is gone
    move along, move along, just to make it through
    (2015 self)
    Yon Assassin said:

    We need a font for " I am not being serious and am just doing bad overacting".
    Like this?

    No, that font is only for naming the worst things. Unspeakable things like Almond Ice Cream.

    And bold, for me, is for the most powerful of emphasis, or for absolute conviction.
  • Princess AlicePrincess Alice
    You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
    I remember early on in the IJBM 2 days there was somebody who used Comic Sans to indicate they weren't being serious...
  • AlirozAliroz
    ...And even when your hope is gone
    move along, move along, just to make it through
    (2015 self)
    Central Avenue said:

    I remember early on in the IJBM 2 days there was somebody who used Comic Sans to indicate they weren't being serious...


    On the good old GitP forums, blue text means sarcasm.
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