Ennis Hofftard (Will Arnett) - A cyclist who teaches English and chases women. His catchphrase is "Catchphrases are for losers". He is inept at thinking his plans through, usually causing even more trouble, and he seldom thinks about anything unless it has something to do with a woman or the promise of avoiding work. He is shown to be very talented when it comes to getting a woman, even being a dating teacher before becoming an English Teacher. He has also exhibited on several occasions the internal thought processes of a house cat which he refers to as his "comfort kitty" (a live action cat with a very foul tongue) because he is cowardly. He was influenced by a feeling of failure to live up to his military dad but he later learns that his father was also a cowardly figure who has a comfort kitty of his own.
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