Do you have too many Smarties to eat them all on your own?

Well, you're in luck! For only $14.99 a month, you can subscribe to Princess Alice's new Smartie-eating service!

Princess Alice: She eats the Smarties so you don't have to!!

Comments

  • Touch the cow. Do it now.
    I have no Smarties :(
  • You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
    I can fix that.

    If you donate $2, I'll buy a bag of Smarties rolls, and I'll even go to the trouble of eating them all for you so you don't have to deal with them!
  • Touch the cow. Do it now.
    this seems shady
  • Munch munch, chomp chomp...
    American or British?
  • You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
    Tell you what, Imi: I'll give you a free trial. Just provide me your credit card details, and I'll eat all the Smarties that come into your possession for the next month free of charge. After one month, the service will auto-renew at a rate of $14.99 per month plus a $2.00 candy wrapper disposal fee.


    Crystal said:

    American or British?

    I'll eat both!
  • Touch the cow. Do it now.
    what if I want to eat my own Smarties
  • ...And even when your hope is gone
    move along, move along, just to make it through
    (2015 self)
    I make little walls and hills out of the smarties.  When I have a lot I'll try to connect four walls to make a fort.
  • You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022

    what if I want to eat my own Smarties

    Why would you want to go to all that time and effort? What if something goes wrong? Some things are best left to the professionals.


    Aliroz said:

    I make little walls and hills out of the smarties.  When I have a lot I'll try to connect four walls to make a fort.

    Are you confusing Smarties with Legos again?
  • kill living beings
    No.
  • Aliroz said:

    I make little walls and hills out of the smarties.  When I have a lot I'll try to connect four walls to make a fort.


  • vtkvtk
    embrace the confusion
    "Too many Smarties to eat them all on your own"? I didn't think such a quantity existed.

    Another disposal method: pulverize the Smarties and sell the powder on the street, preferably to kids who don't know what cocaine is supposed to smell like
  • You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
    I sure hope you're not implying this is just a cynical scam on my part in an attempt to get people to pay me to eat their candy.
  • I eat smarties all the time... Oh, you mean the crappy chalk smarties.

    Meh, I eat all the British smarties to myself. Don't need a professional to do it for me. 
  • imo smarties and rockets are both good
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