Nobody sells plain clothes anymore

Bee

I'm trying to put together a Halloween costume and I need a plain brown jacket and pants.  Apparently, these are considered culturally obsolete or something because nobody sells them anymore.  The "jacket" sections are all raincoats and hoodies, and every goddamn pair of non-jean pants in the city is covered in cargo pockets and bullshit.

Hell, I saw an entire aisle of fucking nylon parachute vests.  But no plain pants.

Obā-san

what sort of brown jacket? a mac? a chore coat? jean jacket?

and there should be like plain brown pants at the gap or something, or dockers at any department store you could shake a stick at, or goodwill even.

also, what's a parachute vest?

Bee

These tacky-ass things

Seriously, there was a whole fucking aisle of nothing but that.  It might have made sense if it was a Back to the Future Day thing, but I was looking since before that.

Sex Grips

It's getting harder to be a plainclothes police officer.
good luck with your search

Obā-san

oh, puffer vests.

but yeah, i could help you find a brown jacket if you could tell me/show me a picture of what you're looking for if you want

if im good at anything it's finding clothes on the internet

Bee

It's Professor Layton.  A few of the stores had the right style of jacket but only in, like, grandpa gray.  I actually found some suitable pants, but I can't pick any until I have a jacket to match color against.

It's also surprisingly difficult to find an orange shirt without a bunch of garbage on the front, but at least I can pick something and wear it backwards if it comes down to it.

I can at least make the top hat for myself.

Sex Grips

Mm, I think you'd get a similar effect if you got any kind of pea coat or other kind of topcoat and popped the collar. Try a few on at your local Value Village or what not and have a pic on your phone for comparison.