***MY FIRST DARK POKEMON FIC***

Alduin

The dark night was black as misery and darkness, while dark storm clouds bled dark water that seemed to come from Hades itself. Lightning erupted through the dark clouds of the blackest dark night, splitting the dark night sky of black into two. Ash Ketchum ran with his gun holstered and Pikachu running beside him. He was bleeding at the mouth, running from some invisible force. Pikachu and Ash sivered from the cold and the dark night of blackest night.

" Pikachu we need to get to the POKECENTER" extrapolated Ash. "Pika pika" announced Pikachu. "Your right Pikachu, we'll never make it in time...not like this.." retorted Ash.Ash let out a feirce wail that could peirce the heavens themselves. He cried out in pure agony and pain-stricken agony. "NOOOOOOO" wailed Ash. Pikachu turned back and saw was gaining on them. A fierce two-storey Charizard with black skin and bloodshot red eyes was hot on there heels, it's mouth open and full of flames.. "NOOOOOOO" agonizingly cried ash. "It's the end...pickachu..." he cried, with tears of blood in his eyes. "Pika pi!!!!!" stated Pikachu, as the Charizard startedto advance on them.

"Onix I choose you" whined a voice. A goliath of pure stone, rock and stone appeared. The Onix constricted the Charizard in its coils. A man jumped out as swift as wind and took out an AK-47. With several shots to the head, the Charizard wailed in pain. Its rotting skull dropped off, covered in blood and ridled by bullets. "Whoare you? and why did you save me" inquired Ash. "No time, there may still be Pokemon out here" gasped Brock.

They made there way to the Pewter City. "So who are you" shouted Ash. "I'm Brock. I keep the pease here." replied Brock. 

1st chapter please r&r

Obā-san

15/10, it was beautiful


no, it was more than beautiful


it was....

Alduin

Thanks, I got my inspiration from Diehard, Samurai X and Noir.

Justice4243

I'm making this face right now: :3

Alduin

Man, this was actually inspired by a fanfic I wrote as a kid. 

I was a dumb kid and thought that "Pokemon....WITH GUNS" was a good and original idea. I even tried to get my brother to post it on some long-dead Geocities site. 

Hexartes

Do you still have a copy of it?

Alduin

Yes. As a matter of fact, the OP was an edited version of the first chapter. 

I added in purple prose and redundant tautologies to make it more obvious that it was a joke, but the Charizard death scene is completely unaltered.

Hexartes

Ahahaha, that's great. I wish I was able to look upon stupid stuff in my past without being utterly ashamed of it.

Alduin

Are you kidding me

For the first 20 minutes I was like "oh my fucking God did I really write this shit"

Hexartes

Well yes, but if I saw something that bad I would've probably had a panic attack.

ProfessorGator

I like how the skull is already rotting before he's dead.

lee4hmz

I don't have any fanfic lurking in my past, but for the longest time I did have a journal written in timeline format, started sometime in 1995 or 1996. It was so full of #what that even looking at it a few years later did my head in a bit...looking at it now, it'd be like 

CARL

It doesn't matter. None of this matters.

Alduin

ProfessorGator said:

I like how the skull is already rotting before he's dead.

That was Doom-inspired.

Jumpingzombie

This is beautiful, just like wonderful.

I'm pretty sure I destroyed the half a page of fanfiction I wrote once. I'm glad I never wrote any other stories down. I distinctly remember a Harry Potter fanstory I came up with that had a self insert character who lived in a bathroom stall in an orphanage and there was a cave near by where the made the various weird candy featured in the books. Yeahh...I don't fucking know.

Alduin

While they were in the Pokemon Ceter

"So what brings you here" interviewed Brock. "Well im a small town boy from Pallet City. I want to fight the 8 Gym leaders and become the champion" replied hastily ash. He shiftrily looked around him shiftily. "Im Brock." stated Brock. "Im the first Gym leader here." 

so what was the deal with the Charizard" asked Brock. "OK let me tell you interviewed Ash"

----------FLASHBACK--------

Ash was hitting a lass on the nreby area outside Pokemon league. "Baby whats you're sign I'm a pisces that means I want to get inside of you" smoothly talked ash. The lass giggled. HANDS OFF MY GIRL PUNK" yelled an incoming imposing Jr. Trainer. "Whats you're problem punk" defiantly cried Ash. "MY PROBLEM S that your HITTING ON MY FIRLFRIEND" repied the JR TRAINER The Jr Trainer and ash stared each other down. "Pikachu go!" yelled Ash. Pikachu roared at the Jr Trainers incoming Beedril. "Pika pi!" said Pikachu, roaring. 

The Jr Trainer stamped his foot. A giant chasm opened up and they three trainers fell in. "WHAT?" said Ash yelling. WHY IS THIS HAPENING. eplied th e Jr Trainer" 

once Ash regaind consciousness hes aw the lass crouched over the Jr Trainers body. She was crying. His forhed was cracked and full of all blood. Why did this happen?" asked the Lass. "Screw him, lets find our way out" replied Ash. He tok the girls hand slyly and started to walk forward. He made sure to cock his pistol.

A distances a way, they found Pikachu not hurt seriously. :Come on Pikachu, lets leave" sreplied Ash. "Pika pii" Ash and the gigglin lass stumbled upon a sign. "Caution a dangerous Pokemon lies ahed. Signed, Lance from Pokemon League" Hmmm we should proceed, thought Ash. I want to impress tis girl.

They came across a dangerous Pokeon sprawled out across the room. The bonds connecting him were weak. The Pokemon appeared a s a dragon Charizard black as Erebus. A tail flamed up at the end opposite its head. "Goodness.... a Charizard!!!!!!!!!!!!" Ash yelled. "The yell was so great that the bonds bounding Charizard broke. Charizard roared, after vigintillions of years great Charizard was loose again, and ravening for delight. What a highly trained Elite Four had done a small kid and his girlfriend had undone. 

Ash save meeee" said the girl. Ash took the girl and flung her as far as he could from Charizard. The Charizard fomed at the mouth and tried to eat Ash, but he rolled like a barrel just in time and shot Charizards eye out. Charizard roared in pain swooped down upon the screaing brosed Girl, and ate her up. "NOOOOO" cried Ash. He sprang up towards where he had fallen. Ash looked up. Footholds! He was saved. "Footholds we are saved!" cried ASH to Piachu. Asha nd pIKACHU scurried up the footholds. THE charizard was advancing upon them.

---------END FLASHBACK-------

"So I was cheking out a girl when a rapist tried to rape her, but then we unexpectedly fell down. The rapist dumbly freed a sleeping Charizard, and he was eaten, but the girl was eat too. I barley escaped with my life." said Ash. "Thats the truth and the short version" he added.

"Hmm, 

that sounds impossible but your face isn't a lyar's face." added Brock. 

The Pikachu is healed!" cried Nurse Joy. "Let's go get him!"

"After they had gone to Brocks Gym, Ash and Brock sat down in a private room. Brock asked "So, whats the real reason why you want to go down this road? I know horse shit when I hear one." 

"OK you are too smart for me, I'll tell you." snarked Ash.

Alduin

the joke is that Ash is a terrible, misogynistic and completely unsympathetic "hero"

Kinda reminds me of New Dante.