The Star Wars Expanded Universe

Mr. Darcy

You never know what you're going to find. Giant space skulls? Sure!

Justice4243

You should read some of the shit Lando got into before he was in the movies. "Epic" dosen't even begin to describe it.

Also, moved to media.

Spacey

The Anzati (singular: Anzat) were a dangerous and mysterious Force-sensitive near-Human species with two tentacle-like proboscises that curled out and extended from their cheeks, with which the Anzati were able to feed upon the brains of their prey. With the tentacles retracted into seams along each side of their nose, Anzati were indistinguishable from any other humanoid species in the galaxy.

i'm not sure there's anything i can add to this, besides

SPACE VAMPIRES

Mr. Darcy

You mean besides the Colt 45 ads? Do tell.

I also know that Darth Vader was harassed by the Energizer Bunny.

Justice4243

Well, I don't think the bunny thing is canon, but Lando ends up fighting some sort of slug wizard that can control perception over three books and makes ridiculous sums of money by gambling with space whales that can secrete precious gems from their glands.

Justice4243

Also, Han and Chewie have fought zombies before.

At least once, that is. 

Spacey

were they storm trooper zombies or just normal zombies

Mr. Darcy

Justice42 said:

makes ridiculous sums of money by gambling with space whales that can secrete precious gems from their glands.

Haha, what?

Corporal Forsythe

also everything that happened in the star wars EU that's not explicitly "infinities" or the "what-if" part of Star Wars Tales is canon

Boba Fett falling into the sarlacc not once, but three times? Canon

Leia having a lightsaber duel against Darth Vader between episode IV and V? (Yes, you read that right.) Canon

Darth Maul finally being defeated by a middle-aged Luke Skywalker? Canon

Look at this motherfucker right here, LOOK AT HIM

that hawaiian shirt and lei is there on purpose because he speaks like a surfer beach bum

....and he's canon

Corporal Forsythe

"Okay, like, there I was, just hangin' out with some of the dudes[...] We're like sittin' there just diggin' the sunshine...like how great it was to be out there baking, y'know? When, like, all of a sudden, ZINGO! Instant deep freeze! 'Whoa, dudes! Oh no! Hey!' The Iceheads were like, gone. History. And it's been snowing ever since!"

Mr. Darcy

But Vader's alternate clothes? Not canon.

Hexartes

I think Star Wars canon is very... loose.

That pun was an accident by the way.

Justice4243

futureSpacey? said:

were they storm trooper zombies or just normal zombies

Stormtrooper zombies. Hopefully I didn't spoil anything from that book.

Imipolex G

Star Wars is ridiculous, always has been

Justice4243

C-3PO once lead a droid rebellion before a mind wipe.  

Spacey

ha, that book's at my local library, I'll have to read it, if only for Han Solo shooting Stormtrooper zombies.

...They have way more Star Wars books than you'd expect, it's weird. Maybe one of the librarians is a... 

What do you call a Star Wars fan? A Warsie? Like a Trekkie? 'Cuz, Warsie sounds like the worst thing ever and I don't want to call someone that.

...You could just call them a Star Wars fan, but that's no fun.

Justice4243

"Warsie" was sort of the accepted terminology, but it sounds so lame I don't think it really caught on.

Mr. Darcy

But the Stormtroopers do get to have Player 2 colours.

Justice4243

Those guys looked bad ass, but they weren't super great or anything as they get dispatched by someone who is actually bad-ass (an Imperial Royal guard). Fatty there is actually a pretty decent assassin.

The dude with the red on his helm is an ex-Imperial Royal guard who found out he was force sensitive. He was one of many people to rule the Empire for a very short period of time. 

Mr. Darcy

Also, Chewbacca's dad is named is called Itchy and he masturbates to holograms of this woman:



... I don't want to know why they call him "Itchy."

Justice4243

The Star Wars Holiday special is just all kinds of bad.

Mr. Darcy

But it's where Boba Fett comes from! Boba Fett.

And where Chewbacca's family comes... ... ...from.

Spacey

Boba Fett rode a dinosaur in it.

Boba Fett riding a dinosaur makes anything awesome.

Corporal Forsythe

C-3PO once lead a droid rebellion before a mind wipe.  

As far as star wars continuity goes, Droids wasn't a bad cartoon at all

I mean hell as far as the whole universe goes, it's actually one of the things that didn't get stupid

Justice4243

Actually, I think that happened in one of the comics, or something...

But, Droids was decent from what little I saw.

Mr. Darcy

Corporal Forsythe said:

As far as star wars continuity goes, Droids wasn't a bad cartoon at all

But Ewoks was sheer magic.

Look, magic:

Hexartes

Can we all just agree that KOTOR is the best part of the Expanded Universe?

Spacey

Kexruct said:

Can we all just agree that KOTOR II is the best part of the Expanded Universe?

Oh, definitely.

Hexartes

I didn't dislike KOTOR II. But something felt vaguely wrong every time I played it. That was a few years ago. I wonder if it'll be that way if I play it again.

Spacey

Kexruct said:

I didn't dislike KOTOR II. But something felt vaguely wrong every time I played it.

How so?

Corporal Forsythe

I actually never played the first KOTOR, only KOTOR II (and the MMO.) I thought it was pretty decent. The ending cut off really stupid, but the characters more than made up for it. 

Corporal Forsythe

Also I think Darth Traya is the single most interesting character in the entire EU. 

Spacey

Corporal Forsythe said:

Also I think Darth Traya is the single most interesting character in the entire EU. 

It was nice to see an EU sith lord that wasn't all "KILL EVERYTHING IN SIGHT" for once.

Hexartes

futureSpacey? said:

Kexruct said:

I didn't dislike KOTOR II. But something felt vaguely wrong every time I played it.

How so?

I DON'T KNOW AUGH

I think it was the interface. And because of how dark everything was. And also because the characters were different.

Spacey

Kexruct said:

futureSpacey? said:

Kexruct said:

I didn't dislike KOTOR II. But something felt vaguely wrong every time I played it.

How so?

I DON'T KNOW AUGH

I think it was the interface. And because of how dark everything was. And also because the characters were different.

wasn't the interface the same as in KOTOR I?

and what're you talking about, the game was well lit. even the abandoned mining station full of zombie robots had plenty of lighting!

(i prefer the KOTOR II party to the KOTOR I party, honestly. 'Cept for Jolee. And Mission. And Canderous. Though, he was in KOTOR II, so it's ok.)

Hexartes

No, I mean the darker tone. 

Spacey

Oh, right.

...Yeah, it was a bit darker, I think.

...Really darker, yeah.

Well, that's more of a matter of opinion, I guess. It's one of the reasons I like it more, actually. 

It isn't very "Star Wars-y", though, now that I think about it.

Hexartes

Mind you, I didn't dislike it.

I just felt uncomfortable.

Corporal Forsythe

I just reinstalled The Old Republic, decided to give it another try. I just wish it did the one thing that Galaxies got right, and that was each planet being giant sandboxes. 

Mr. Darcy

So a century after Return of the Jedi, this happened:



Shao Khan, dominatrix Darth Maul, and some douche from a black metal band tried to take over the galaxy.

Justice4243

"Shao Khan's" story is even MORE convoluted than the average Star Wars villain. He seems to be a character introduced in the Clone War comics that ended up having a fight with Obi-Wan in between the trilogies. 

Mr. Darcy

He's that old? I thought he was human under the armor. Is he a clone of the one introduced in a Clone Wars comic?

Justice4243

Naw, he's human.

He's using Yuuzhan Vong technology to keep him alive, or something.