A layman's guide to Law and Order SVU

edited 2020-03-31 22:29:49 in General
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What is Law and Order SVU?: A show about a special victims unit in New York who investigate sex crimes. It has lasted for, according to my estimates, the entirety of recorded human history.

Where do I watch it?: You half-watch it when it's on while your mother and brother are in the room. If you are watching a full episode, it means you are currently 14 and have run out of Tivoed shows on your dad's TV you are interested in, like Psych or Aladdin.

What happens on it?: The cops in SVU investigate a sex crime. Sometimes it turns out to not be actually a sex crime, but they keep working on it anyway because dibs I guess? Often it is related to current events in the news, so Ice-T will fight Gamergate or Paula Deen will shoot Trayvon Martin in a particularly ill-advised media tie-in.

Who are the characters?:

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This is Benson. She is the main detective lady. She is more level-headed than her partner. Taylor Swift has a cat named after her. Here is the cat
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This is Stabler. He is genuinely unstable and has issues with sex criminals that mean he probably should have been kicked out of the SVU years ago, but he is Benson's partner except for the seasons where he is not

tumblr_n0l1anuWMh1qz8wiwo1_1280.jpg

This is Ice-T. He is a rapper. Despite having been in the SVU since the beginning of recorded history, every crime is vaguely confusing to him, as he does not understand how someone could be a rapist or be sexually attracted to children. Nevertheless, he persists.

John_Munch_in_Law_&_Order-_Special_Victims_Unit.JPG
This is John Munch. He is Tommy Westphall's real father and the cosmic lynchpin that prevents the TV universe from collapsing. It is for his sake that God spares the world from destruction.

220px-Doanld_Cragen.jpg

This is the chief. He is their boss. He hugged a monkey that came out of a basketball once

How 'Law & Order: SVU' Tackled Animal Rights - Pacific Standard

What about the various assistant DAs?: I don't care

When do the autistic guy and American national treasure Paget Brewster show up?: They are not on this show. They are on Criminal Minds

Why should I watch this show?: You watch it when you have nothing better to do.

Comments

  • There are more things on heaven and earth than are dreamt of in your philosophy, Horatio.
    this is artful
  • Munch munch, chomp chomp...
    Lol good.
  • I've learned to tolerate drama...except on the boat
    Has the Aladdin series aired on U.S. TV at any point in the last ten years? Seriously, I think Pepper Ann has aired here more recently than that has
  • id watch a show about that cat and monkey solving crimes
  • Jane said:

    this is artful

  • Deadass I just had a lecture in my gender, race and class class where we talked about how it was problematic because the Academic Viewpoint® is that the show is at once progressive due to its depiction of survivors and perpetrators of sexual assault as more diverse than your standard "white woman/black man" narrative and misogynistic for depicting mothers in such a way that they are universally considered abusive

    I was definitely kinda ehhhhhhh about the argument because I don't know if it's the responsibility of a show that's ostensibly about sexual assault to go out of its way to show positive mother/child relationships, but at the same time I also feel like if it's something that is considered worth pointing out in such a setting then it probably would be worth it for the producers to try every now and then

    (disclaimer: I don't really watch SVU and I only have an entry level understanding of feminist praxis so I can't consider myself an expert in this subject area in any way)
  • edited 2017-02-18 02:59:50
    I actually like L&O SVU more than basically any of the other police procedural shows except for other L&O shows.

    Munch is the best character.  Cragen is second best.

    Benson is given too much spotlight and is too often shipped with Stabler.  Stabler is not stable at all and should have been kicked out of the force years ago.
  • Stabler is not stable at all and should have been kicked out of the force years ago.

  • immune to splash damage
    but he's stabler than the rest of us
  • id watch a show about that cat and monkey solving crimes

    Meanwhile...

    You're Under Arrest or Psycho-Pass?
  • edited 2017-02-18 03:16:29
    Also
    Odradek said:

    What about the various assistant DAs?: I don't care

    > ignoring Casey Novak and Alex Cabot

    not even @Crystal would do this
  • Munch munch, chomp chomp...
    Wait. Why me?
  • Crystal said:

    Wait. Why me?

    Because image and image
  • For once, or maybe twice, I was in my prime.
    Remember in main series L&O when that assistant DA outed herself as a lesbian literally in the last few minutes of her last episode?

    "You're fired."
    "Wow. Um. Is this because I'm a lesbian?"
    "No. Wait, you're a lesbian?"
  • edited 2017-02-18 03:51:54
    Munch munch, chomp chomp...
    Oh oooh. Well, you're not wrong.

    If there's anything I will likely remember about L&O SVU after this thread it'll probably be that, like a lot of dreck shows I don't care about, At Least It Has Cute Girls.
  • Munch munch, chomp chomp...
    Wait, I think I actually recognize Alex courtesy of glancing at the screen when my parents are watching L&O SVU periodically.
  • Crystal said:

    Oh oooh. Well, you're not wrong.


    If there's anything I will likely remember about L&O SVU after this thread it'll probably be that, like a lot of dreck shows I don't care about, At Least It Has Cute Girls.
    Oh, it's even better than just Having Cute Girls.  It Has Cute Girls Doing Awesome Things, like laying down the law with wit.
  • my favorite police procedural is still probably CSI Miami

    yntkt
  • Munch munch, chomp chomp...


    Crystal said:

    Oh oooh. Well, you're not wrong.


    If there's anything I will likely remember about L&O SVU after this thread it'll probably be that, like a lot of dreck shows I don't care about, At Least It Has Cute Girls.
    Oh, it's even better than just Having Cute Girls.  It Has Cute Girls Doing Awesome Things, like laying down the law with wit.
    Unfortunately, police procedural.
  • kill living beings
    fucking incredible
    also
    Odradek said:

    Paula Deen will shoot Trayvon Martin in a particularly ill-advised media tie-in

    are you serious
  • My dreams exceed my real life
    Yes

    jezebel.com/the-trayvon-martin-paula-deen-episode-of-svu-was-absolu-1440775748
  • Crystal said:


    Crystal said:

    Oh oooh. Well, you're not wrong.


    If there's anything I will likely remember about L&O SVU after this thread it'll probably be that, like a lot of dreck shows I don't care about, At Least It Has Cute Girls.
    Oh, it's even better than just Having Cute Girls.  It Has Cute Girls Doing Awesome Things, like laying down the law with wit.
    Unfortunately, police procedural.
    Wait, you _don't_ like police procedurals?
  • Munch munch, chomp chomp...
    Lukewarm history at best with them.
  • edited 2017-02-18 04:35:15
    Crystal said:

    Lukewarm history at best with them.

    Aww, sorry to hear that.

    Though to be honest I find myself uninterested in most of them and only really interested in L&O's subseries, specifically because of L&O's presentation being very dry/serious and very case-focused (rather than character-focused).
  • Munch munch, chomp chomp...
    Like I could go into why, but it'd be in my personal thread. I get the appeal but it's not very entertaining.
  • Sup bitches, witches, Haters, and trolls.
    Odradek said:

    Yes

    jezebel.com/the-trayvon-martin-paula-deen-episode-of-svu-was-absolu-1440775748

    and i thought the gamergate ep was ridic
  • ...i assumed that "Ice-T fights Gamergate" and "Paula Deen Shoots Travon Martin" were like

    the joke

    as opposed to things that actually happened
  • There are more things on heaven and earth than are dreamt of in your philosophy, Horatio.
    Tamlin said:

    ...i assumed that "Ice-T fights Gamergate" and "Paula Deen Shoots Travon Martin" were like

    the joke

    as opposed to things that actually happened

    I heard it's got more content than the Civ 5 New Worlds Expansion!
  • There are more things on heaven and earth than are dreamt of in your philosophy, Horatio.
    sorry I botched the quote, it's actually


  • kill living beings
    What
  • Sup bitches, witches, Haters, and trolls.
    Obā-san said:

    ...i assumed that "Ice-T fights Gamergate" and "Paula Deen Shoots Travon Martin" were like

    the joke

    as opposed to things that actually happened

    plot twist: the gamergate guy was logan paul
  • extremely not so but maybe just a tad yes
    Odradek said:

    photo GibbonCragen.gif
    I, too, wish to hug the basketball monkey
  • There are more things on heaven and earth than are dreamt of in your philosophy, Horatio.

    this is artful


  • Heinzes said:

    Odradek said:

    photo GibbonCragen.gif
    I, too, wish to hug the basketball monkey

  • “I'm surprised. Those clothes… but, aren't you…?”
    Heinzes said:

    Odradek said:

    photo GibbonCragen.gif
    I, too, wish to hug the basketball monkey
  • There are more things on heaven and earth than are dreamt of in your philosophy, Horatio.

    Heinzes said:

    Odradek said:

    photo GibbonCragen.gif
    I, too, wish to hug the basketball monkey
    image
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