1: Happy New Year! This day is neutral.
2: This day is positively charged. On this day you should use only blue ball-point pens.
3: You're more likely than usual to lose a grasshopper-battling match on this day.
4: Buy a pet poodle on this day and its mouth will contain a $100 bill.
5: Cockroaches are really interesting.
6: If you have a significant other, try shopping at a hardware store with them.
7: You will receive a letter from a religious foundation.
8: Are you in South America? It's time to fill up your car's gas tank.
9: Don't walk into trees today. That hurts.
10: It's Unexpected Internet Gifts Day! Buy a friend a Loot Crate.
11: It's raining somewhere today.
12: Don't argue against eating your veggies today.
13: Your parents might have found out your biggest secret. Call them to apologize.
14: Eat pure cane sugar today. You may end up pooping gold.
15: It's okay to be gay. Rejoice with the boys.
16: Residents of Iowa should be aware that prices on magic wands will be discounted today.
17: If you find an ant crawling on your leg, then you shouldn't be planning a vacation to Kuala Lumpur on this day.
18: On this day, if you eat baked beans, you won't get any gas.
19: Ask your doctor if investing in the stock market is right for you.
20: If you hit your head with a frying pan today, it won't hurt at all!
21: Watch a TV show from your youth! You will discover a hidden truth.
22: Don't go golfing with your boss on this day. You'll win against your boss and that'll be embarrassing.
23: This is a great day for wearing a blue hat and purple pants.
24: Leave the fireplace off today.
25: It's time to buy a new smartphone!
26: The twenty-sixth sewer grating you run across today will contain ducklings inside, and you'll be asked to rescue them.
27: Residents of Vladivostok should play videogames today.
28: Ask your hotel clerk if you can get a free night's stay. You have a 60% chance of getting one.
29: Today is another neutral day.
30: Today is negatively charged, so you should use your electric car today.
31: Using your hair dryer today will scare your cat.