sometimes i feel slightly bad for dolphins

Salix Babylonika · 2016-08-04 12:24:18

they are wet all the time and no one understands what they're saying

Odradek · 2016-08-04 12:35:47

How beautiful do the words have to be
Before they conquer every heart?
How will you know if I'm even in the right key
If you make me stop before I start?

[Chorus]
If I came back as a dolphin
Would you listen to me then?
Would you let me be your friend?
Would you let me in?
You can cut off all my fins
But to your ways I will not bend
I'll die before I let you tell me how to swim
And I'll come back again as a dolphin

Why does my brother have to go hungry
When you told him there was food for all?
This is the man that stands next to the man
That stands to catch you when you fall (Oh!)

If I'm under water, will you find me? (Find me)
Will you shine a light and try to guide me?
It's happened before, I've knocked on your door
But you wouldn't let me in

How beautiful do the words have to be
Before they conquer every heart? (Oh!)

[Chorus]

(I'll come back, baby)
(Let me in, let me in) As a dolphin
(Be my friend) Dolphin
(Yeah, yeah)

Dolphin
As a dolphin
As a dolphin
As a dolphin

Salix Babylonika · 2016-08-04 12:42:05

Those are song lyrics.

Sredni Vashtar · 2016-08-04 13:00:21

Dolphins are extremely smart animals with really advanced languages and tools and culture, but we can't understand a damned thing they're saying and they don't have thumbs and we treat them like space aliens for displaying our bad habits on occasion because the idea of something being smart enough to be creatively evil terrifies us.

So yes, I feel sorry for them basically all the time. We're morons and we take all the credit because we have hands.

Salix Babylonika · 2016-08-04 13:03:16

No you don't understand what I'm getitng at.

They're wet like..................basically all the time.

Sredni Vashtar · 2016-08-04 13:03:54

Well, yeah.

Salix Babylonika · 2016-08-04 13:04:23

that's terrible

Salix Babylonika · 2016-08-04 13:05:52

all the time

Sredni Vashtar · 2016-08-04 13:06:59

Being wet only sucks if you are meant to live your life dry. So us being dry all the time might be equally pathetic to them.

Salix Babylonika · 2016-08-04 13:07:11

ALL THE TIME, SREDNI

Salix Babylonika · 2016-08-04 13:07:27

THEY ALLWAYS HAVE WATER IN THEIR EARS

Sredni Vashtar · 2016-08-04 13:09:05

Because their ears are built for that, though. Us not having water in our ears is probably gross and weird to dolphins.

Salix Babylonika · 2016-08-04 13:11:06

you don't understand, what if a dolphin can realize that there are water in its ears and that that is not the natural state of being

does this freak out the dolpin, caulsing them to go on a dolphin rampage

Salix Babylonika · 2016-08-04 13:11:59

janeposting in a jane thread

Klinotaxis · 2016-08-04 15:06:38

you know what's sad? human ears are full of farts basically constantly

Aliroz · 2016-08-04 16:47:17

Jane get it.

Being wet is not a good state. Water does not belong in the ears. We left the oceans eons ago, and were never to come back to that horror.

The water, the water, the all-devouring end of all things, that universal solvent... We still have nightmares about it sometimes.

Crystal · 2016-08-04 16:51:41

Jotaro.

Bee · 2016-08-04 16:52:04

I feel bad for dolphins too. They're playing around doing flips and shit, and then some jackass space aliens come in and vacuum everything up and then there's time travel and dinosaurs and sky tubes and shit. Poor fuckers.

Klinotaxis · 2016-08-04 16:59:19

you're made of water. you're just getting wetness more wet. relax

KilgoreTrout · 2016-08-04 17:30:37

Aliroz said:
Being wet is not a good state.

I know some women who would strongly disagree.

(Can't believe I'm the first one to make that joke, but it's right there and I'm damned if I'll let it go unmade!)

Imipolex G · 2016-08-04 18:07:18

Bee said:
I feel bad for dolphins too. They're playing around doing flips and shit, and then some jackass space aliens come in and vacuum everything up and then there's time travel and dinosaurs and sky tubes and shit. Poor fuckers.

welcome to the machine

Salix Babylonika · 2016-09-02 06:25:11

I forgot about this thread

Anonus · 2016-09-02 06:30:20

i feel bad for dolphins because they are memetically evil

Princess Alice · 2016-09-02 17:56:23

...what other funny threads did I miss while I was away? Must check archives

Crystal · 2016-09-02 18:30:46

Jotaro.

Imipolex G · 2016-09-03 07:14:31

Dolphins Evolve Opposable Thumbs

"Oh Shit," Says Humanity

glennmagusharvey · 2017-01-06 20:06:19

Imipolex G said:
Dolphins Evolve Opposable Thumbs

"Oh Shit," Says Humanity

/me encourages Cockroaches, Mice, and Crows to evolve opposable thumbs too

Make Animals Great Again

Salix Babylonika · 2017-10-08 07:46:32

ꀭꍏꈤꍟ said:
I forgot about this thread

Viani · 2017-10-08 09:42:53

Dolphins will never have access to fire, and therefore, will never become the dominant species when humankind is gone.

Sadface.

Klinotaxis · 2017-10-08 12:25:19

Their ancestors walked on land. They made their choice.

Viani · 2017-10-08 14:10:48

-samurai jack- THEY CHOSE THE PATH!!!!
-dolphins- EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

Boney · 2017-10-08 15:39:22

Undead Socialist Memelord said:
Being wet only sucks if you are meant to live your life dry. So us being dry all the time might be equally pathetic to them.

I think they die if they get too dry. They probably think we're some kind of weird alien

sometimes i feel slightly bad for dolphins

Comments

Howdy, Stranger!

Categories