Hi reader! Do YOU want to join a bear cult?
That's right, today, for the low low price of No Money, you can join a real cult about real, actual bears. [DISCLIAMER: we mean da animals and not the gay kind. We support your quest for love, though.]
Here are some FEATURES you'll get if YOU join BEAR CULT:
- touch their fuzzy little ears
- boop their cute little snoot
- feel their soft little paws
- WORSHIP THE RAW, PURE POWER OF THE BROWN ONES IN ITS UNDILUTED FORM
BEAR CULT is a real and legitimate religion, not like fraud scam religions (Scientology, other cults, Leontodism, Purple Mana in Magic The Gathering, Christianity) and you WILL feel the power upon joimin BEAR CULT. Disclaimer; if you cjhoose to call the bear by their true powerful name we do not claim respoinsibility, culpability, or blameability for anything that might hhappen.
JOIN BEAR CULT TODAY
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