Pursuant to Her Meredithical Majesty's Order 19 on Automatic Hotel Amenities, Section 1 "The God Damned Phones" and Section 2 "TV" and Section 12C "Computer Stuff Or Whatever", as modified April the twenty-second of the Two Thousand Eighth year of the Common Era, it is the pleasure of Her Majesty's Computer/Telephony Administrations Corps ("Sysadmins") to inform you, the systems administration officer of The Hotel of the Heapers' Hangout Forum, that the smooth operation of the wireless internetworking, digital and analog television, and other technologies telephonical or electromechanical for the pleasure of your Hotel's guests is guaranteed by statute, and that the aforementioned Corps will ensure this compliance. All complaints to your administration must be copied verbatim to the Sysadmins' virtual mailbox at thegoddamnphones@hotels.sysadmin.crown.ct to ensure the happiness of Hotel occupants. As an internal policy of the Sysadmins, not required by the aforementioned Royal Order, assistance from the Sysadmins in maintaining compliance shall be available to you at syshelp@hotels.sysadmin.crown.ct. This assistance may include anything from experienced help technicians over the phone to on-site installation services, free of charge. We're all in this together.
I am now required by the aforementioned Statute to recite to you the 239th chapter of Her Majesty Queen Meredith's Official Memoirs, "Concerning The TV Service on That Thing Where I Went to Seattle for a Diplomatic Thing, It Was Just Awful, Didn't Even Get Nickelodeon". Please remain on the li
Hello, this is Her Majesty's Computer/Telephony Administrations Corps again. The line seems to have cut out and this is being investigated. I will now proceed with the recit
Mister Hesse, please report this problem with your phone lines to the Corps. Now I will begin t
Mister Hesse, I understand that you're experienced with this thing, but you know perfectly well I've got to make you hear it one way or another. If the line continues to fail I will take it a
Comments
Assassin poems, Poems that shoot
guns. Poems that wrestle cops into alleys
and take their weapons leaving them dead
I am now required by the aforementioned Statute to recite to you the 239th chapter of Her Majesty Queen Meredith's Official Memoirs, "Concerning The TV Service on That Thing Where I Went to Seattle for a Diplomatic Thing, It Was Just Awful, Didn't Even Get Nickelodeon". Please remain on the li
Hello, this is Her Majesty's Computer/Telephony Administrations Corps again. The line seems to have cut out and this is being investigated. I will now proceed with the recit
Mister Hesse, please report this problem with your phone lines to the Corps. Now I will begin t
Mister Hesse, I understand that you're experienced with this thing, but you know perfectly well I've got to make you hear it one way or another. If the line continues to fail I will take it a
Mister Hesse I'm going to have to call the poli