There is something dastardly about Countess Queen's shabby mendacity
and sneaking duplicity, at least insofar as this essay is concerned. I
think we can clearly say that Countess Queen considers all of her
critics to be sick-minded, disgraceful loons—or worse. When describing
them, Countess Queen lets some of the most gruesome, impudent, and
contemptible words I've ever heard pass through her lips, words that
serve no purpose other than to bring home the point that officialism is
rapidly becoming the rule of the day. Am I aware of how Countess Queen
will react when she reads that last sentence? Yes. Do I care? No,
because in a lustrum or two, her hatred of all things pure and good will
erupt like Mt. Vesuvius, scattering the ashes of totalism over everyone
in its path. In reaching that conclusion I have made the usual
assumption that Countess Queen is guilty of at least one criminal
offense. In addition, she frequently exhibits less formal criminal
behavior such as deliberate and even gleeful cruelty, explosive
behavior, and a burning desire to spoon-feed us her pabulum.
Countess Queen is utterly licentious, as she has proved to my
complete satisfaction. I wish that one of the innumerable busybodies
who are forever making “statistical studies” about nonsense would
instead make a statistical study that means something. For example, I'd
like to see a statistical study of Countess Queen's capacity to learn
the obvious. Also worthwhile would be a statistical study of how many
loud devotees of conspiracy theories realize that we are at war. Don't
think we're not just because you're not stepping over dead bodies in the
streets. We're at war with Countess Queen's humorless expositions.
We're at war with her purblind projects. And we're at war with her
insolent utterances. As in any war, we ought to be aware of the fact
that Countess Queen has flung herself into one rhetorical pratfall after
another with the unswerving momentum of a blind rhino. I trust that I
have not shocked any of you by writing that. However, I do realize that
some of my readers may feel that much of what I have penned about
Countess Queen in this letter is heartless and in violation of our
Christian duty to love everyone. If so, I can say only that Countess
Queen has repeatedly been spotted conditioning the public—or, more
precisely, brainwashing the public—into believing that 75 million years
ago, a galactic tyrant named Xenu solved the overpopulation problem of
his 76-planet federation by transporting the excess people to Earth,
chaining them to volcanoes, and dropping H-bombs on them. When
questioned about that, she either denies any knowledge of it or offers
unbelievable and ludicrous explanations that only a fatuous, uncongenial
malefactress could believe.
Worst of all, our children's children would never forgive us for
letting Countess Queen operate on a criminal—as opposed to a civil
disobedience—basis. It may not be within the scope of this letter to
encourage people to inculcate in the reader an inquisitive spirit and a
skepticism about beliefs that Countess Queen's bootlickers take for
granted, but I would like to mention that we must mobilize the public.
We must get people to make Countess Queen pay for her crimes against
humanity.
Please don't misinterpret that last statement to mean that it's
perfectly safe to drink and drive. That's not at all what it means.
Rather, it means that Countess Queen decries or dismisses capitalism,
technology, industrialization, and systems of government borne of
Enlightenment ideas about the dignity and freedom of human beings.
These are the things that she fears because they are wedded to
individual initiative and responsibility. She has a vested interest in
maintaining the myths that keep her little empire loyal to her.
Countess Queen's principal myth is that big emotions come from big
words. The truth is that self-righteous anthropophagi often take
earthworms or similar small animals and impale them on a pin to enjoy
watching them twist and writhe as they slowly die. Similarly, Countess
Queen enjoys watching respectable people twist and writhe whenever she
threatens to protect undeserved privilege. I hope I haven't bored you
by writing an entire letter about Countess Burgundy Queen. Still, this
letter was the best way to explain to you that the people Countess Queen
attacks deserve compassion, not insults, put-downs, or stereotypes.
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Comments
In a prior letter, I identified a set of ideological premises as
superordinate constructions that maintain the rhetorical context in
which Queen Alice of Centralia is able to steal the fruits of other
people's labor. I will now elaborate on three of her most logorrheic
premises:
The Eleventh Commandment is, “Thou shalt start wars, ruin the
environment, invent diseases, and routinely do a hundred other things
that kill people”.
For openers, Queen of Centralia claims
that she should be a given a direct pipeline to the National Treasury.
You should realize that absolutely no empirical evidence obtained by
scientific means exists to support that claim. Alas, that doesn't stop
Queen of Centralia from replacing love and understanding with
interventionism and exclusivism.
Wherever birdbrained, bestial heretics are seen strapping us down
with a network of rules and regulations, Queen of Centralia is there.
Wherever evil buggers are found wooing over lethargic oniomaniacs by
using tactics such as scapegoating, reductionist and simplistic
solutions, demagoguery, and a conspiracy theory of history, Queen of
Centralia is lurking nearby. Wherever goofy cretins are observed
spheterizing other people's belongings, Queen of Centralia will no doubt
be in the vicinity. I defy any coincidence theorist to try to explain
away those observations. Clearly, having to listen to the glossolalia
that spews forth from Queen of Centralia's mouth is not a pleasant
experience. More emphatically, I wouldn't judge her cohorts too
harshly. They're just cannon fodder for Queen of Centralia's plot to
portray bleeding-heart skinheads as smatchets.
For all the alarums and excursions, the fact remains that it's
astounding that Queen of Centralia has somehow found a way to work the
words “histomorphologically” and “pseudoparenchymatous” into her
publications. However, you may find it even more astounding that
whenever there's an argument about her devotion to principles and to
freedom, all one has to do is point out that I am growing weary—and
wary—of her self-deluded scare tactics. That should settle the argument
pretty quickly. In public, she vehemently inveighs against corruption
and sin. But when nobody's looking, she never fails to kill the goose
bearing the golden egg. Queen of Centralia's faithfuls have recently
enjoyed some success at causing pain and injury to those who don't
deserve it. Queen of Centralia considers this a reason to kvell. In
contrast, I, not being one of the many hubristic ultracrepidarians of
this world, consider it a reason to discuss the programmatic foundations
of Queen of Centralia's naive rodomontades in detail.
We can divide Queen of Centralia's bromides into three categories:
brassbound, cynical, and argumentative. Queen of Centralia's deflection
and falsification of our highest culture tendencies will frog-march
Queen of Centralia's enemies into the nearest detention center or
internment camp, and deep down in our bones, we all know why. Riddle me
this: Is there anything that Queen of Centralia can't make her trained
seals believe? Although I haven't been able to concoct an acceptable
answer to that question, I can suggest a tentative hypothesis. My
hypothesis is that since their emergence on the stage of history,
muzzy-headed, ugly Neanderthals have been a parasitic growth on the stem
of true citizens. That's too big of a subject to get into here so let
me instead discuss how she is secretly planning to throw away our
freedom, our honor, and our future. I realize that that may sound
rather conspiratorial and far-fetched to most people, which is why you
need to understand that I fully intend to place a high value on honor
and self-respect. I will spare no labor in doing this and reckon no
labor lost that brings me toward this mark. Even so, the world is full
of people who diminish society's inducements to good behavior. We don't
need any more people like that. What we need are people who are
willing to call a spade a spade. We need people who understand that
Queen of Centralia's lickspittles all look like Queen of Centralia,
think like Queen of Centralia, act like Queen of Centralia, and shake
belief in all existing institutions through the systematic perversion of
both contemporary and historical facts, just like Queen of Centralia
does. And all this in the name of—let me see if I can get their
propaganda straight—brotherhood and service. Ha!
All I can tell you is what matters to me: Childish firebrands are
often found at Queen of Centralia's elbow. This suggests to me that
many people respond to Queen of Centralia's petulant taradiddles in the
same way that they respond to television dramas. They watch them; they
talk about them; but they feel no overwhelming compulsion to do anything
about them. That's why I insist we answer the biased weasels who
undermine serious institutional and economic analyses and replace them
with a diverting soap opera of venal, grotesque conspiracies. My
eventual goal for this letter is to renew those institutions of civil
society—like families, schools, churches, and civic groups—that wake
people out of their stupor and call on them to stick to the facts and
offer only those arguments that can be supported by those facts. I'm
counting on you for your support.
I have to imagine the Queen Alice one was written by like, the Frank Grimes of Centralia.
This is a letter of love and peace; I will not lash out against
anyone, and I will not use specific names of individuals or
organizations that force people to act in ways far removed from the
natural patterns of human behavior. That said, let me merely point out
that I'm tired of superficial moochers. I will start this discussion by
arguing that Lilly uses good motives as a cover for evil ones. Then, I
will present evidence that Lilly's hypocrisy is transparent. Even the
least discerning among us can see right through it.
We must overcome the fears that beset us every day of our lives. We
must overcome the fear that Lilly will cause riots in the streets. And
to overcome these fears, we must catalogue Lilly's swindles and
perversions. As for the larger picture, the irony is that her most
biased policies are also her most inimical. As the French say, “Les
extremes se touchent.”
Do you really think Lilly will ever learn from her mistakes? The
largest problem, however, is that I can promise freedom-lovers
everywhere that my priorities, observations, countermeasures, and
predictions are not in any manner similar to those embraced by Lilly.
Lilly may mean well, but some of my acquaintances express the view that
she is a bear of very little brain, and long words bother her. Others
express the view that my life's work is to reach the broadest possible
audience with the message that Lilly's conduct can be described as less
than ladylike. I am prepared to offer a cheer and a half for each view;
together, they paint a sufficiently complete picture of Lilly to
warrant a full three cheers.
Anyone who hasn't been living in a cave with his eyes shut and his
ears plugged knows that Lilly says it is within her legal right to pit
people against each other. Whether or not she indeed has such a right,
if Lilly thinks that she's inflexibly honest, thoroughly patriotic, and
eminently solicitous to promote, in all proper ways, the public good
then maybe she should lay off the wacky tobacky. It wasn't so long ago
that people like you and me were free to show pluck and optimism when
presented with threats and terror. Recently, that's become a lot harder
to do. What happened that changed things so much? To put it briefly,
Lilly happened. By grasping at straws, trying to find increasingly
querulous ways to pull the levers of demagogism and oil the gears of
Lysenkoism, Lilly has managed to cripple her foes politically,
economically, socially, morally, and psychologically. Her propaganda
machine once said that she would never reap a whirlwind of destroyed
marriages, damaged children, and, quite possibly, a globe-wide
expression of incurable sexually transmitted diseases. So much for
credibility!
My goal is to challenge rather than accommodate the mainstream's
presuppositions. I might not be successful at achieving that goal, but I
really do have to try. You may make the comment, “What does this have
to do with stingy, inaniloquent pamphleteers?” Well, once you begin to
see the light you'll realize that knowledge and wisdom are Lilly's
enemies. She understands that by limiting education and enlightenment,
she can fool more people into believing that genocide, slavery, racism,
and the systematic oppression, degradation, and exploitation of most of
the world's people are all entirely justified. Sadly, those with the
least education are those who would benefit most from the knowledge that
my opinion of Lilly hasn't changed ever since, ages ago, I heard her
say something about how ebola, AIDS, mad-cow disease, and the hantavirus
were intentionally bioengineered by pernicious, power-hungry slobs for
the purpose of population reduction. The point is that Lilly talked
nonsense then, and she talks nonsense now. The only thing that's
changed is that her backers don't want us to appeal for comity between
us and her. That'd be too much of a threat to moral relativism,
credentialism, and all of the other benighted things they worship.
Clearly, they prefer devastating vast acres of precious farmland. Our
goal must now be to reveal the constant tension between centripetal and
centrifugal forces of dialogized heteroglossia resulting from Lilly's
convictions. If you believe that that's a worthwhile goal, then I can
truly use your help. Let me hear from you.
I've seen a number of sophomoric and tyrannical things over the
years, but Robert Glocestershire's refrains really take the cake.
Instead of focusing on why the best advice I can give to a group is to
help people break free of Robert's cycle of oppression, I would like to
remind people that the time has come to deal with the relevant facts. I
don't think anyone questions that. But did you know that I would
rather die than remain silent in response to that which I am convinced
is profoundly hate-filled?
There is something grievously wrong with those sneaky foolish-types
who shackle us with the chains of scapegoatism. Shame on the lot of
them! If Robert got his way, he'd be able to promote a covinous
aspheterism. Brrrr! It sends chills down my spine just thinking about
that. Many members of his coterie believe that his adages are a breath
of fresh air amid our modern culture's toxic cloud of chaos. Even
worse, almost all of his hirelings believe that Robert is inflexibly
honest, thoroughly patriotic, and eminently solicitous to promote, in
all proper ways, the public good. (One would think that the mammalian
brain could do better than that, but apparently not.) My point is that
by allowing Robert to siphon off scarce international capital intended
for underdeveloped countries we are selling our souls for dross.
Instead, we should be striving to provide light, information, and
knowledge about his lawless viewpoints.
We can say that Robert is living in a dream world, and Robert can
claim the opposite, and it won't make one bit of difference. All that
we have achieved may now be lost, if not in the bright flames of
presenteeism then in the dense smoke of the petulant “compromises”
promoted by duplicitous beguilers. Common-sense understanding of human
nature tells us that his appalling misjudgment and obstinacy in twisting
our entire societal valuation of love and relationships beyond all
insanity are already being discussed quite widely—so much so, in fact,
that Robert's equally staggering misjudgments regarding heathenism are
escaping well-merited ridicule and rebuke. To rectify that
pretermission, allow me to observe that I, not being one of the many
argumentative grobians of this world, am not interested in debating
Robert. One can't have a debate with someone who is so willingly
ignorant of the most basic tenets of the subject being discussed. It
would be great if all of us could demand a thoughtful analysis and
resolution of our problems with Robert. In the end, however, money
talks and you-know-what walks. Perhaps that truism also explains why
Robert must sense his own irremediable inferiority. That's why he is so
desperate to use terms of opprobrium such as “bad-tempered hooligans”
and “lackluster lunatics” to castigate whomever he opposes; it's the
only way for him to distinguish himself from the herd. It would be a
lot nicer, however, if Robert also realized that I don't care what
others say about him. Robert is still liberticidal, puzzleheaded, and
he intends to annihilate a person's personality, individuality, will,
and character.
Although chimpanzees can be convinced to wear clothing, understand
commands, and even ride bicycles (if well paid for their services in
bananas), it would be virtually impossible to convince Robert that if
you don't think that people who collaborate with him and expect him to
show them the same consideration deserve to be left out in the cold,
then you've missed the whole point of this letter. If he sincerely
believes that representative government is an outmoded system that
should be replaced by a system of overt jujuism then he must be smoking
something illegal. I used to think it would be possible to work out a
compromise with Robert. Unfortunately, the terms that he insists upon
are so totally unacceptable and so much in contradiction with earlier
agreed-upon points that one can conclude only that Robert alleges that
all literature that opposes antagonism was forged by malignant moochers
of one sort or another. Naturally, this is a tale told by an idiot,
full of sound and fury, signifying nothing. He contends that human
beings should be appraised by the number of things and the amount of
money they possess instead of by their internal value and achievements.
Excuse me, but where exactly did this little factoid come from?
To quote the prophet Isaiah, “Woe to ye who clear-cut ancient forest
lands”. Robert obviously didn't have to pass an intelligence test to
get to where he is today because his knowledge of how things work is
completely off the mark. First of all, some people think it's a bit
extreme of me to resolve our disputes without violence—a bit over the
top, perhaps. Well, what I ought to remind such people is that Robert
is obviously under the influence of LSD or some other hallucinogenic.
Why else would he warrant that nosism is a beautiful entelechy that
makes us whole? I doubt we could beat this into his head, but his
latest pleas are particularly dissolute, even by Robert's dissolute
standards. Am I being unduly harsh for writing that? I think not.
When the religious leaders in Jesus's time were wrong, Jesus denounced
them in extremely harsh terms. So why shouldn't I, too, use extremely
harsh terms to indicate that Robert feels obligated to erect a screen of
flatulent verbiage to hide the real world from his victims? Sorry for
babbling so much, but it is appalling to me that Robert Glocestershire
has managed to marginalize and eventually even outlaw responsible
critics of grumpy upstarts.
Surface defects in the CMB are superconformal. However, in recent papers, little work has been done investigating a Toda TQFT in the presence of a fractional D2 brane. We take a warped approach. Next, we make contact with orbifold singularities during inflation, interestingly classifying (p,q) 7- branes at the Tevatron. When deriving path integrals in twisted gauge Theories deformed by marginal F-terms, we predict that models of solitons can be found from String theories deformed by Chern-Simons terms, whenever unparticle sectors in models of gluons are supersymmetric inflationary.
society -- like families, schools, churches, and civic groups -- that wake people out of their stupor and call on them to stick to the facts and offer only those arguments that can be supported by those facts. I'm counting on you for your support.
> This suggests to me that many people respond to Queen of Centralia's petulant taradiddles in the same way that they respond to television dramas.
> petulant taradiddles
> taradiddles
As a citizen of this country, which I believe in and which I have seen Omnivius Corporation tear apart, I must plant markers that define the limits of what is beer-guzzling and what is not while remaining true to those beliefs, ideals, and aspirations we hold most dear. First off, Omnivius Corporation pretends to have the solution for everything. In reality, it creates more problems for the rest of us to solve. Consider, for example, how Omnivius Corporation has been fairly successful in its efforts to legitimate irresponsibility, laziness, and infidelity. That just goes to show what can be done with a little greed, a complete lack of scruples, and the help of a bunch of disrespectful draffsacks. Why does Omnivius Corporation want to convert houses of worship into houses of defeatism? I blame the stultifying effect of pure, undiluted greed. Of course it's also true that Omnivius Corporation's plan is to cause this country to flounder on the shoals of self-interest, corruption, and chaos. Omnivius Corporation's yeomen are moving at a frightening pace toward the total implementation of that agenda, which includes shaming my name.
We must pronounce an enlightened and just judgment upon Omnivius Corporation. As mentioned above, however, that is not enough. It is necessary to do more. It is necessary to give the needy a helping hand as opposed to an elbow in the face. Yet there's more to it than that.
Omnivius Corporation claims that it's a tribune of the oppressed. I respond that its primary source of amusement is to destabilize the already volatile social fabric that it purportedly aims to save. I look with horror at Omnivius Corporation's predaceous pleas and can't help but think that its dream is to assume total control over society's means of production. Those with membership cards in Omnivius Corporation's plunderbund will be given whatever they want while the rest of us will be sent away empty-handed. In addition to being utterly unfair, such policies promote unfurling the cruel flag of vandalism. Furthermore, it has written volumes about how its vices are the only true virtues. Don't believe a word of it, though. The truth is that it does not hold itself answerable to any code of honor. I always catch hell whenever I say something like that so let me assure you that it would like to see all of our individual liberties digest in the bowels of an all-powerful State. If you don't believe me, see for yourself.
Does Omnivius Corporation do research before it reports things, or does it just guess and hope it's right? The reason I ask is that if you're like most people you just shrug your shoulders whenever you hear about Omnivius Corporation's latest worthless slurs. When your shoulders get tired of shrugging I hope you'll realize that by refusing to act, by refusing to build a society in which people have a sense of permanence and stability, not chaos and uncertainty, we are giving Omnivius Corporation the power to envelop us in a nameless, unreasoning, unjustified terror. If Omnivius Corporation were to cashier anyone who tries to build a better world, a cleaner world, a safer world, and a saner world, social upheaval and violence would follow. It is therefore clear that I shall be blamed by ignorant persons when I say that if Omnivius Corporation is allowed to stifle the voices of those who are simply seeking to be heard, the implications can be widespread. Cruel as that maxim may appear, we can disagree with Omnivius Corporation without being disagreeable. For instance, I would like to politely disagree with some of its expostulations by pointing out that sometime in the future Omnivius Corporation will foist the most poisonously false and destructive myths imaginable upon us. Fortunately, that hasn't happened…yet. But it will truly happen if we don't let Omnivius Corporation know, in no uncertain terms, that I can defend each and every point I've made so far.
If you'll allow me a minor dysphemism, I don't see how Omnivius Corporation can be so subhuman. Or, to phrase that a little more politely, some people have indicated that Omnivius Corporation's goombahs should reevaluate their cherished assumptions about presenteeism. I can neither confirm nor deny that statement, but I can say that I was absolutely gobsmacked the first time I saw Omnivius Corporation moving increasingly towards the establishment of a totalitarian Earth. Since then, I've seen it do that so many times that I hardly bat an eyelid when someone tells me that Omnivius Corporation is extremely foolhardy. In fact, my handy-dandy Foolhardy-O-Meter confirms that when Omnivius Corporation's homilies are challenged, it usually responds by making bigotry respectable. Well, you can't really expect it to defend its positions with facts, explanations, logical arguments, or even references to events that occurred less than two years ago, can you? We must stop tiptoeing and begin marching boldly and forthrightly towards our goal, which is to study the impact on society of Omnivius Corporation's greed, stupidity, hubris, and outright corruption. As Omnivius Corporation matures morally it'll eventually grow out of its present way of thinking and come to realize that we must reach out to people with the message that belligerent bigamists, temulent polluters, and Omnivius Corporation's servitors are totally and completely fungible. We must alert people of that. We must educate them. We must inspire them. And we must encourage them to pursue virtue and knowledge.
Please don't misread my words here; many innocent people are being manipulated into carrying out “preventive operations” (that means “targeted killings”) against Omnivius Corporation's rivals by the most sickening display of ophidian cant that I have ever witnessed in my entire life. I want to thank Omnivius Corporation for its reinterpretations of historic events. They give me an excellent opportunity to illustrate just how dangerous Omnivius Corporation can be.
There are two things we need to do right away. First, we need to drive off and disperse the deplorable menaces who grant a free ride to the undeserving. Second—and this is critical so get out your highlighter—we need to lead the way to the future, not to the past. Once those two things are accomplished we can finally start discussing how Omnivius Corporation has been trying to convince us that its views epitomize wholesome family entertainment. That argument fails to take into account the reality that I appreciate feedback and other people's views on subjects. I don't, however, appreciate feedback when it's given in an unprofessional manner. “Hypersensitive” is Omnivius Corporation's middle name, and deep down in our bones, we all know why. Anyone with an IQ two points higher than a wet sponge's knows that Omnivius Corporation plants false evidence to incriminate its nemeses. But, even so, in public, Omnivius Corporation promises that it'd never limit the terms of debate by declaring certain subjects beyond discussion. In private, however, it secretly tells its followers that it'll do exactly that. I think we've seen this movie before: It's called Business as Usual for Omnivius Corporation.
If I recall correctly, nettlesome drug lords often take earthworms or similar small animals and impale them on a pin to enjoy watching them twist and writhe as they slowly die. Similarly, Omnivius Corporation enjoys watching respectable people twist and writhe whenever it threatens to seize control of the power structure. Rather than pick out appropriate verbs and nouns, Omnivius Corporation pads all of its sentences with extra syllables to grant them an atmosphere of authority. I, on the other hand, prefer to use simple language to express the sentiment that there is considerable evidence to show that Omnivius Corporation is serious about wanting to spread lies, propaganda, and misinformation. That may sound unbelievable, but it's the truth. Another unbelievable but true statement is that recidivism is dangerous. Omnivius Corporation's tactless version of it is doubly so. Does anybody else feel the way I do, or am I alone in my disgust with Omnivius Corporation?