I just got a great early Christmas gift.

Tnu1138 · 2011-12-19 17:58:55

Yeah I JUST got the news about the death of Kim Jong-Il I nearly jumped out of my seat with joy. Burn in hell motherfucker!

Justice4243 · 2011-12-19 18:47:55

Huh...I was gonna say I got a Batman steering wheel cover and a giant inflatable D20.

Not really one to celebrate someone's death, but I can't really say this is a bad thing. Kim Jong-Il certainly didn't dedicate his life to peace or improving the state of the planet.

I wonder if they'll have some (potentially fake) cases of people mourning so hard they commit suicide or some (almost assuredly fake) instances of magic cranes coming down to whisk Kin Jong-Il to heaven like his fahter.

Tears of a Crowd

"Entering 1994, Kim Il Sung looked fine on the surface," wrote Hwang Jang Yop in his post-defection memoir, "but considering the fact that he could not even control his flatulence when talking to us, I started to believe that his days were numbered."

Hwang was right. On July 8, 1994, the Great Leader died of a heart attack at 82.

His death caused a flood of tears. Tens of thousands of Koreans flocked to statues of the Great Leader and wept uncontrollably. They cried, they keened, they wailed. Many fainted, several suffered heart attacks.

It was a genuine outpouring of grief by the people, but among the party elite, Hwang reveals, it soon became a contest to see who could cry most.

"There started an open competition of crying," he wrote. "One might cry once or twice but there is no way to keep on crying. But since people had to continue paying respects to Kim Il Sung's body, or offering flowers at his statue, they just pretended to cry, holding a handkerchief to their eyes."

The orgies of weeping inspired a new myth for the cult of Kim, and it was soon featured in a propaganda film.

"When the most beloved leader Kim Il Sung passed away, thousands of cranes descended from heaven to fetch him," the narrator intones mournfully over shots of cranes flying through gray skies. "But the birds couldn't take him away because they saw that all North Koreans cried and screamed and pummeled their chests and pulled out their hair."

Deeply moved, the cranes instead put Kim Il Sung to rest "in a heavenly palace built on Earth."

That "heavenly palace" is the Great Leader's Kumsusan Palace, which the Dear Leader renovated -- for an estimated $900 million -- into an elaborate tomb. There, the mummified corpse sits under glass, reigning as "President for Eternity."

King_Friday · 2011-12-19 20:28:10

I love some of the world reactions to his death, political leaders seemed very courteous despite the many wrong doings over his "career". Until that is
Don Manzullo, chairman of the US House foreign affairs subcommittee on East Asia who was quoted as saying

"Kim Jong-Il was the epitome of evil, a dictator of the worst kind who ruled his country with an iron fist and dished out constant pain and misery to his people. We hope his passing will mark a new chapter for North Korea. This is an opportunity for North Korea to emerge from its cycle of oppression and walk down a new path toward democracy."

God bless him and his honesty, I'm still cackling.

King_Friday · 2011-12-19 20:29:01

Oh and going back to the thread topic, Justice shook his presents the naughty boy and has spoiled ANOTHER one of his gifts. He tells me all people do this but I think he lies...

Justice4243 · 2011-12-19 20:33:32

Figuring out what you got for Christmas by handeling the gift and judging it's weight, shape,size, etc... is a time honored tradition.

It's only when you try to open a corner of a present and subtly re-tape it after the fact are you breaking Christmas surprise gift etiquette.

Tnu1138 · 2011-12-19 22:27:38

Do I know you King Friday? You seem ....familiar

Anonus · 2011-12-19 22:29:15

She's Justice's wife.

Tnu1138 · 2011-12-19 22:30:12

Oh wow Maybe we haven't met then.

I just got a great early Christmas gift.

Comments

Howdy, Stranger!

Categories