The Republic of Centralia

edited 2014-04-01 00:06:41 in General
Isn't constitutional democracy great? I sure do love how, instead of being born into a position of power and keeping that power for life, I have to "earn" power by convincing people who aren't as smart as me that I'll give them what I want! Then repeat that process every four years!

Speaking of which: VOTE PRESIDENT ALICE, 2014! Alongside my running mate, Chrysanthemum Rose the Democratically Elected Unicorn, we'll keep Centralia moving!
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  • image Wee yea erra chs hymmnos mea.
    Don't listen to her lies! For years she has mislead the citizens of this fair nation into following her petty whims! But no more, I say! Nay, for if I am elected, we can forge forward, into a time of prosperity and glory for all!

    VOTE PRESIDENT ALICE, 2014!
  • Dear candidates, what are your stances on the following issues:

    1. non-4:3 computer screens

    2. moë in the anime industry

    3. first-person shooter games

    4. pornographic My Little Pony fan-works

    5. Comic Sans and Papyrus, the fonts

    6. the use of alternative cursewords, such as "frick" and "heck"

    7. the Keystone XL Pipeline
  • kill living beings
    8. the Oman issue

    9. is love the way?

    10. what's the deal with
  • 11. what is love?

    12. what is a man?

    13. is this the real life?
  • “I'm surprised. Those clothes… but, aren't you…?”
    1. Mathematical!
    2. Creepy and vaguely sexist!
    3. Not my field of expertise but if you like them that's OK!
    4. Not into that but as long as you're not gross and annoying about it I don't care!
    5. Hard to use well!
    6. Holy carp, fuckin' A!
    7. Environmentally questionable!
    8. Depends on what issue you mean!
    9. It is the way but not the only way!
    10. The real question is not "what?" but "who?" and "why?"!
    11. Baby, don't hurt me!
    12. Not just a worthless pile of memes!
    13. It's probably not just fantasy, Freddy, but I guess that's an OK rhetorical question when things get really confusing, which is a given when you're trapped in a Queen lyric, since it's probably in that case as much a fantasy as anything eeeeeeellllllllllllllllllsssssssssssssssssssssssseeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee...!
  • You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
    1. Choice is important for the consumer! That's why, under my administration, all consumers would be able to choose what aspect ratio they want for their computers. Or something like that!
    2. Pass.
    3. They're fun! I assume, my important presidential duties don't leave much time for video gaming.
    4. Not even touchin' that one.
    5. They're not as good as Georgia.
    6. I support all regional language differences. Diversity is important to a thriving country!
    7. What's so XL about it anyway? Were there Keystone M and L pipelines before it?
    8. Sexist. There needs to be Owoman as well.
    9. Of course! As some five-year-old girls once said, Love makes the world go 'round.
    10. Fragment (consider revising)
    11. Prince First Gentleman Anonus, of course!
    12. A miserable little pile of voting for me, I'd hope.
    13. Of course not. Real life is boring.
  • You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
    oh holy crap Sredni beat me to answering
  • Weasel ninjas. The best kind of ninjas!.


    Also, I should get around to writing about the Baromy of Kexructland.
  • kill living beings
    i'm gonna vote for whoever the fuck can tell me what lambert's w function has to do with dihydrogen and why
  • VOTE FOR ME BECAUSE IF YOU DO I'LL CLOCK YOU IN THE FUCKIN FACE AND EVERYONE LIKES TO BE PUNCHED
  • VOTE FOR ME BECAUSE IF YOU DO I'LL CLOCK YOU IN THE FUCKIN FACE AND EVERYONE LIKES TO BE PUNCHED

    -writes my mom's name on the ballot-

    -repeatedly-
  • You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
    ...this is a weird election.

    Not that I care, so long as I get those precious votes. Oh yeah, support the Laughter Party!
  • LWLW
    edited 2014-04-01 21:19:40

    1. They should be available for those who want them, but should not be the standard screen resolution.
    2. Moe is difficult to define, but I can agree that it can be annoying, especially when it is used as pandering or whatever. That said, there are probably worse problems with the "anime industry" than moe and if some moe fluff is the price to pay for slice of life shows, I am okay with that.
    3. I oppose all violence.
    4. They are pretty gross and clash with the tone of the work. See Fanworks That Do Not Fit the Tone of a Work for more information.
    5. They get more flack than they deserve. I fully support the right to choose one's font. Defending typeface freedom is important to me, even if one's font choice is unpopular.
    6. Marginally better than actual cursing, but still unnecessary.
    7. I think it is more important to focus on issues that actually affect Centralia directly.
    8. That guy has all the right moves.
    9. No, but I think it should be, that is why one of my main priorities when I am in office will be to rebuild infrastructure. It disappoints me that our government has been cutting costs so much that now most roads are either made of love or peace or friendship, but never all three combined like they used to be. Engineering experts agree that you need all three for harmonius roads and that if we do not do anything about that problem, our children and our grandchildren could be feeling the effects years from now.
    10. Grape nuts? I have spoken with experts on the subject far more qualified to speak on it than I and even they say it is a complete mystery. Please do not accept oversimplified or "too good to be true" statements on this very complex issue.
    11. You're The Man Now, Dog.
    12. I know that as a dog I may not have the same experience with "being a man" as the other candidates. However, I view that as a strength because of the outsider perspective it gives me. I also believe that the president of Centralia should represent all of its citizens, whether they be people, unicorns, dogs, cats, washing machines, or what have you.
    13. Since I firmly believe that figments of imagination should have full rights in Centralia, I do not subscribe to the realist idea that such things should matter. Our society was built on imagination and valuing beings based on whether or not they exist is an affront to that national heritage.
  • edited 2014-04-01 21:58:05
    We can do anything if we do it together.
    1. I'm honestly used to non-4:3 computer screens by now, so I'm not sure if I could go back to 4:3.
    2. Moe's like a lot of other stimulants. It's fun in small doses, and toxic in big ones.
    3. They can be fun if you've got friends who want to play them with you.
    4. I plead the fifth.
    5. I still think it was a mistake to try to add lower-case to a comic book-based font.
    6. I try to swear lightly myself, but using these substitutes feels off to me.
    7. Not very good for anyone but the oil companies.
    8. John might've sung that song better than Paul did, but Paul sings it well enough that it almost doesn't matter.
    9. All I know is that love's been the way for me for a while.
    10. Bon Iver? His falsetto is irritating to me, and his songs aren't good enough to overcome that.
    11. <insert embed of "Friday I'm In Love" here>
    12. Are we not men? We are Devo!
    13. Most of it feels pretty real to me, although there are parts that tempt me to think otherwise.
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