What's with those fasho continuity nietzschecomix? OR Odradek reads New 52

Odradek · 2013-07-10 14:48:40

Okay, so Voodoo #2 starts with a couple in bed in a motel, while a purple narration text box talks about being a killer. Turns out the couple in bed are Evans(Voodoo in disguise) and Jess. Jess talks about how they shouldn't be doing this because they're partners and they'd lose their jobs yada yada yada you've heard this before. Jess starts to smoke while going on a weird digression about Voodoo-the-stripper's "tight little body".

Urrrrrggggghhhh.

So the phone starts ringing but Voodoo-as-Evans prevents Jess from answering it Turns out the Razors are gonna move on Voodoo tonight and they're gonna dissect her. Voodoo-as-Evans quickly ducks out of the room into the bathroom and heads out the bathroom window. Meanwhile Jess gets a call that tells her that Evans is dead. She goes into the bathroom with a gun, but Voodoo is already gone.

Back to the strip clubs, the cops are investigating the room where Evans was killed and we get more information we already know about Voodoo being the killer and her name being Priscilla Kitaen. Jess does not seem phased that her partner who she was ready to sleep with died violently, but I guess that's what makes her such a good agent.

Meanwhile, Voodoo is walking down the street, but runs afoul of the Black Razors. The razors try to tranquilize her, but she shifts into her monster form and starts fighting. Suddenly, this guy shows up:

Superhero/villain looking guy is ready to go in, but Jess demands to go in first instead. Turns out she outranks him in a field operation, despite this guy clearly having superpowers and her not seeming to have any. The code word is Ripley(lol Alien) so if Voodoo comes out shapeshifted as her, they know whether to shoot.

Jess walks in, and lets Voodoo know her position immediately by talking about revenge. Voodoo, predictably tackles her, but as Priscilla, not as her monster form. Jess wonders if there's some limit on her shape-shifting and Voodoo talks about completing her mission and helping her people. Jess manages to get away and grab her gun, and we cut to outside, where the Razors hear shots being fired.

Jess walks out, says the code word, and leaves. Then a second later Jess walks out and asks if they got Voodoo.

Telepathy, lol!

Time for Green Lantern VS Voodoo in a desperate attempt to sell this comic! My money is on the guy who can create a giant death robot with his mind.

This issue was pretty boring overall. At no point was it very unclear how any of it was gonna play out, and a lot of it is spent drilling in points we already knew. It moved the narrative forward, but I didn't really learn anything new, other than the existence of whatever the hell Supervillain/hero is.

Yarrun XIX · 2013-07-10 17:28:12

Kyle Rayner? Well, at least it's not Stewart getting involved in this mess.

Maybe it's because I haven't actually read any of the comic, but the writers seem to be doing a bad job with garnering empathy. No matter how awesome you make a fight, it's kind of pointless if you don't have someone to root for. Evil!Voodoo's not particularly compelling as a sympathetic character, and she hasn't done enough cool stuff to attract people through her sheer awesome levels (aka the Wolverine route) (the fact that she looks like a monster from Half-Life doesn't help) (or the confusing and vague backstory that hasn't been touched at all in the last two issues) (this is too many parenthetical comments). And we can't really root for the Black Razors because, out of the two that we've seen, one's a lecherous idiot and the other hasn't gotten nearly as much screen time. Black Jack is cool though.

Also, the helmets were opaque in #1, but they're transparent in #3. Bad show, editor.

Aliroz · 2013-07-10 17:32:52

The "I'm going in now. All this over one skinny alien chick" guy looks as though he is on the toilet in that panel.

Also, CHOOM is a good sound effect. CHOOM CHOOM CHOOM.

Also, why are they not evacuating the civilians?

Odradek · 2013-07-10 17:50:09

Aliroz said:
The "I'm going in now. All this over one skinny alien chick" guy looks as though he is on the toilet in that panel.

Also, CHOOM is a good sound effect. CHOOM CHOOM CHOOM.

Also, why are they not evacuating the civilians?

There's an off-handed line of dialogue that mentions that the hotel Voodoo hides in has been abandoned since Katrina. Don't know why the rest of the street isn't still in danger from her though.

Yarrun XIX · 2013-07-10 17:51:07

^^He kind of does.

And there are no civilians. It's probably in the abandoned warehouse district

Odradek · 2013-07-10 17:52:32

Yarrun XIX said:
He kind of does.

And there are no civilians. It's probably in the abandoned warehouse district

I like to imagine the DC universe specifically keeps these around and doesn't replace them with parking lots and shopping malls because monsters seem to be drawn to them and away from people.

Yarrun XIX · 2013-07-10 17:55:56

Animals tend to avoid others when they're in a weird environment. Maybe the same principal operates here. Move away from the sounds and lights.

One-Winged Eagle · 2013-07-10 19:53:52

That guy's called 'Blackjack', apparently.

Speculation paints him possibly the same character as Major Force...

...whose only claim to fame was killing Kyle Rayner's girlfriend and shoving that mess in the fridge. I'm sure you heard of that.

Yarrun XIX · 2013-07-10 20:22:41

That's Bludhaven, verdad?

Him being Major Force is disappointing.

Yarrun XIX · 2013-07-10 20:23:14

He still looks pretty cool though

Justice4243 · 2013-07-11 03:05:03

I...I just...

"I have special rank allowing me to represent all branches of the United States Military."?!

Someone wrote that and expected it to be taken seriously!?

I'm sure it's handy when you need to boss around members of the coast guard.

One-Winged Eagle · 2013-07-11 03:57:00

Well, Major Force is a crazy gung-ho supersoldier guy, so maybe he just thinks he represents all branches.

Obā-san · 2013-07-11 03:58:17

I have special rank allowing me to represent all branches of the United States Military.

hello my name is Ebony Dark'ness Dementia Raven Way and i am an expert in gorilla warfare

Odradek · 2013-07-15 16:45:41

These covers are becoming something. I don't know what they are becoming, but they are.

So with a gratuitous ass shot, we see Voodoo hitch-hiking and thinking about how men only think with their dicks. This is probably true in the world of Voodoo, because the men certainly do.

A truck pulls up to let Voodoo on, and we meet this guy

I defy you to make this more molest-y.

Later that night, Voodoo walks away from the truck, which now has a blood-spattered windshield and walks across a field to a local gas station.

Jokes aside, this issue isn't so bad so far. The last page managed to convey a lot without much dialogue, Voodoo is dressed fairly sensibly and OH MY GOD

I cannot decide whether redneck misogynist trucker pimp is the best character or the worst.

Voodoo fills in trucker pimp who is apparently another Daemonite agent, on the situation. Earth seems to know more than they'd hope, but not exactly what they are yet. Weirdly enough, there seems to be an art error: Voodoo seems to say that the war council should have sent "one of us" but follow-up dialogue suggests one of the other two women said that. You'd think an editor would catch that.

We learn that Voodoo has a "particle generator" to change her clothes with, and that she can shift into anyone with just a few seconds of contact, but it hurts every time. Trucker Pimp says that this is because they are half-human which seems to suggest that the Daemonites are natural shape shifter, which begs the question of why they need hybrids like Voodoo or Trucker Pimp. It could be that the hybrids are actually hybrids of a different alien species the Daemonites are just using for DNA, but that's just theorizing at the moment.

Suddenly, Kyle Rayner, the Green Lantern bursts in with a big green train construct.

For those not in the know about Green Lantern canon, the Lanterns are a group of intergalactic peacekeepers who possess green rings that let them manifest pretty much anything they can imagine. There are actually four earth Green Lanterns I know of: Hal Jordan, the one from the movie, John Stewart, the one from the Justice League cartoon, Kyle Rayner, the one fans like but editors don't, and Guy Gardener, who is a dick.

If you couldn't tell, I'm more familiar with Green Lantern canon than a lot of DC.

Kyle expositions that coded transmissions into space were picked up from this gas station, and he's here to investigate. He says he broke through the wall because he figured it wasn't a big deal to someone who could send those transmissions, which doesn't seem like a valid inference, but whatever. Space Trucker attacks, understandably.

I actually like Space Trucker's alien form here. It's a furry bug!

The two girls with Space Trucker turn into less impressive aliens that look like Asari from Mass Effect mixed with hammerhead sharks. Voodoo hits Kyle on the back of the head with a crowbar instead of turning into her alien form for some reason. This is ineffective, so Kyle ties her up with green light and Voodoo starts complaining about how "all humans do is hurt and hunt!"

Can I just say this is the most enjoyable issue of Voodoo yet? Kyle's constructs are cool, the alien shape-shifting is cool, Voodoo is not stripping, it's making for an enjoyable ride. That said, it is kind of boneheaded for the Daemonites to have agents that can be at least partially swayed by dialogues that are basically the equivalent of "You're a dick!" "Are Not!"

The aliens distract Kyle while Voodoo escapes in a car. Than the aliens blast off in a starship, which Kyle fails to catch. Good going Kyle.

We end with this little event.

Uh oh! Looks like the Daemonites are doing something? I dunno.

This episode was pretty gratuitously just a tie-in to sell issues, but it was at least entertaining, unlike the last issue. Still not a brilliant or novel bit of writing, but enjoyable, certainly.

Yarrun XIX · 2013-07-15 17:05:17

People like Kyle Rayner? Odd. I thought he was, like, third on the Green Lantern list.

And what is the Daemonites' thing with putting their agents in sexual situations

Odradek · 2013-07-15 17:07:02

Yarrun XIX said:
People like Kyle Rayner? Odd. I thought he was, like, third on the Green Lantern list.

And what is the Daemonites' thing with putting their agents in sexual situations

Juan does, and I just sort of generalize his opinions to be comic fans in general.

Yarrun XIX · 2013-07-15 18:17:04

Yeah, I do that too.

Curse his well-crafted opinions and thick, flowing locks. It's impossible to disagree with them!

Salix Babylonika · 2013-07-15 18:21:55

the only good Green Lantern is John.

Odradek · 2013-07-15 18:30:39

Mo' said:
the only good Green Lantern is John.

Counterpoint: Bzzzd

Salix Babylonika · 2013-07-15 18:32:51

what

Odradek · 2013-07-15 18:36:01

Mo' said:
what

Salix Babylonika · 2013-07-15 18:38:48

is he a fly

Yarrun XIX · 2013-07-15 19:00:38

Yes. And his partner's Mogo, the Green Lantern Planet.

John Stewart's my guy when it comes to human Green Lanterns. Hal's a bit boring (which was the reason why the editors mandated the whole Parallax bit), Gardner's a jerk, and Rayner's...alright, but not as cool as Stewart. There's also Simon Baz, who's this mysterious 5th guy that I just heard about a while ago, but I haven't really looked at him, so I can't make an honest opinion.

And there's Charles Vicker, who was an actor who played Green Lantern and later became a Green Lantern (though he didn't govern over the Earth sector). I just found out about him 10 minutes ago, and he seems pretty cool.

Salix Babylonika · 2013-07-15 19:41:37

I've never even heard of the last two.

One-Winged Eagle · 2013-07-15 21:44:05

We like Rayner because he's clever and imaginative as an artist(I mean really he made Gurren Lagann one time), which we can empathize with, and we grew up on his stories. Back when the artists actually gave a shit about power ring constructs informing us about a character's personality, Rayner's was always the most complicated and varied.

Hal is Geoff Johns' personal pet for reasons I don't understand at all. Seriously, the narrative just straight up calls him the greatest Green Lantern of all.

As for Baz, he's kind of a controversial thing because he's openly Muslim, mistaken for a terrorist, and I think he's an idiot for carrying a gun around when he wears one of the most powerful weapons in the universe as jewelry. I mean yeah, I get that he carries it around because he's afraid and doesn't trust the ring, but to me a much more sensible choice is to train your body and mind.

Also the entire reason Baz was picked was because he could overcome ethnic fear or whatever.

Odradek · 2013-07-15 21:46:27

I would like to note that the writer's need to write Green Lantern in to get readers apparently was warranted, as we have been talking entirely about our favorite green lantern and very little about what Voodoo's been up to.

Salix Babylonika · 2013-07-15 22:06:42

this is because this comic looks mad stupid.

Odradek · 2013-07-15 22:08:50

Mo' said:
this is because this comic looks mad stupid.

True.

Imipolex G · 2013-07-15 22:11:22

Personally, I wouldn't have made it past the first scene. I hate any story that tries to reduce gender relations to "chicks are hot and guys only think with their dicks but it's ok because she's really STRONG and beat him up"

Odradek · 2013-07-15 22:12:25

Dirty Pillows said:
Personally, I wouldn't have made it past the first scene. I hate any story that tries to reduce gender relations to "chicks are hot and guys only think with their dicks but it's ok because she's really STRONG and beat him up"

It's a good thing Kyle Rayner and furry bugs distracted me from how dumb that was.

Imipolex G · 2013-07-15 22:13:58

Indeed.

Yarrun XIX · 2013-07-15 22:21:59

It's interesting to note that Bzzrd tends to make really large constructs (according to Wikipedia). I guess that's the writer informing personality through powers.

And Trucker Pimp's Alien Form reminds me of Wildmutt from Ben 10.

Aliroz · 2013-07-18 20:15:56

I liked John Stewart and Kyle Rayner in that order as my number one and two.

Number three has got to be the guy who is a math equation.

Don't you know? That "GUYS ONLY THINK WITH THEIR MAN-CARROTS AND THAT'S OKAY BECAUSE THE GURLS ARE HAWT AND BEAT THEM UP" thing has a name. It's called Sinfest, and when it's not done in the webcomic of that name, it's called the Sinfest Method Of Genderpolitics, or SMOG.

Martian Manhunter > Green Lantern > Superman > Flash > Wonder Woman > Batman.

One-Winged Eagle · 2013-07-18 20:47:41

I reject your hypothesis with a rebuttal; Criminy, who has little interest in the opposite sex save for one, Uncle Sam who does not think at all because he's a drunk, and the Devil who does not actually seem to have any interest in anyone not himself and uses women on his arm as status symbols and temptation.

Aliroz · 2013-07-18 21:37:27

Well, Criminy has disappeared except for the last few comics where he met a book of feminism that he disagreed with and then Trike Girl said "Your new knowledge is in conflict with your past assumptions"; the Devil is actively doing this patriarchy matrix thing that oppresses women; and yeah, you're right about Uncle Sam.

Justice4243 · 2013-07-19 18:35:17

You know...

I'm trying to figure out what niche Voodoo fills in the DC catalog of comics here.

Between the all the other female main-character comics, they've got pretty much everything covered that they're doing in Voodoo. I mean...unless there's a large audience that wants to see gender warfare play out with angry, shape shifting aliens.

I'm just wondering if this is a case of DC buying a license and thinking "Oh shit! We spent MONEY on this, better see if it's actually worth something!"

Yarrun XIX · 2013-07-19 19:00:16

Don't you hate it when you buy things that you don't know what to do with but you still have to use because MONEY?

Justice4243 · 2013-07-19 19:19:09

Another thing I find funny, is Voodoo and her alien pals aren't really powerful enough to pose a threat to the DC universe in the long run, yet they're powerful enough that they may have run ins with the likes of the Green Lantern core, meaning they're all non-threatening enough that the story isn't all that engaging and also might meet an untimely end if Wonder Woman fumbles tossing a Bus.

Wonder Woman: Shit! I was aiming for Braniac! FUCK!

Superman: Don't worry, they where just a bunch of shapeshifters going on about plans to infiltrate the governments of earth when they took breaks from being terrible misogynists and misandrists. I mean...I would have stopped the bus if it was important.

J'onn J'onzz: Also, I think you hit Major Force.

Superman: Right well, I assumed she didn't care about that...

J'onn J'onzz: Of course.

Kyle Rayner: Yeah, I mean, I've been "missing" with cars and hitting him since this battle started, and it's not like anyone said anything.

Batman: I know you all think this is funny, but I brought all this anti-shapeshifter gas just in case and now Robin needs to take it back to the Batcave!

Tim Drake: Dude! Not cool! I told you that you can't just say "Robin" and expect someone to hop to! There's like FIVE of us, now! You have to point!

Imipolex G · 2013-07-19 19:44:35

comic books

Sredni Vashtar · 2013-07-19 20:01:45

^^ Sublime.

Odradek · 2013-07-19 22:12:51

Odradek · 2013-07-19 22:42:34

Imi will like this cover, I think.

So we begin with Voodoo in an airvent, listening to what are presumably agents talking about what they know about her. People spend a lot of time restating things they already know in this comic, I've noticed. Interestingly, they talk about how her single mother died in a housefire when Pris was 4, and the girl simply disappeared after that incident.

So Voodoo drops into a room with two soldiers talking about last night's undetermined sporting event against Metropolis, which makes me wonder who's talking in the narration boxes. Voodoo either strangles or knocks out the soldiers using her shapeshifter tentacles, while the narration box speculates that one of her relatives took the name Priscilla Kitaen, or that aliens abducted her.

We cut to a brown-haired man talking to Blackjack and Jess, who is revealed to be the one narrating Jess asks if brown-hair is speculating that aliens turned a four year old into "Mata Hari and James Bond rolled into one" which is pimping the character pretty shamelessly, and brown-hair says he's just examining the possibilities. We also learn that Jess's last name is Fallon.

Brown-hair hands out forensic evidence of Evan's murder to Jess and Blackjack, and Blackjack, upon seeing photos, apologizes to Jess for not consoling her about her partner's death until now, which makes me like him more and hope he isn't secretly Major Force.

Voodoo sneaks into another room disguised as a soldier, and this happens

So is this a veiled reveal of what DC thinks of their fans, or a harsh self-criticism, or a dumb cliche? Hard to say.

So Voodoo kills Lloyd with a poison kiss, because no other DC character does that ever and she downloads something called "File.SUPERMAN. SUPERMAN, is, incidentally, my favorite file extension, right next to txt and mp4.

Meanwhile, brown-hair talks about Voodoo sightings, and Jess speculates that there's some limit on her shapeshifting that makes her return to her default form.

Meanwhile, Voodoo does this.

I'm beginning to suspect whoever wrote this was not a computer genius!

Or in terms that will please some people here, I'm sure Computer Over Voodoo=Very Yes.

Some soldiers try to take out Voodoo, but she kills them via a fingerpoke of death and porcupine quills and I begin to realize Voodoo is basically a female Cars from JJBA.

Jess, Major Force and Brown-hair are still talking about Voodoo, and then hear an alarm that's triggered by a power outage, and we see Voodoo sabotaging the generators. Jess assumes it's Voodoo, and Blackjack is weirdly sceptical about whether their shapeshifting alien enemy is the one currently sabotaging their base. Blackjack suggests that Voodoo somehow absorbed knowledge from Jess.

Jess spots a doppelganger of herself, and runs after it, but Voodoo escapes into a crowd. Then she turns into a dog and makes her way out.

Meanwhile the blond guy from last comic's stinger retrieves a laser gun from the wreckage of the gas station and shoots a kid telling him about what happened with it.

Odradek · 2013-07-19 22:45:20

Imipolex G · 2013-07-19 22:54:07

that cover is all right, sure, it has bosoms on it

but that doesn't make up for the lameness of the rest of it

Justice4243 · 2013-07-19 23:50:58

Voodoo really needs some super competent author to take the concept and go hog wild with it to create a character that's interesting. Sort of like what Alan Moore did with Swamp Thing.

I mean, I'm sure there's plenty you can do with a telepathic alien who can shape-shift...

...

Has anyone else figured out that Voodoo is basically the Martian Manhunter with boobs?

Odradek · 2013-07-20 00:02:37

So we can add Cars, The Thing, and Martian Manhunter to the things Voodoo is with boobs.

One-Winged Eagle · 2013-07-20 01:08:30

...she is, isn't she?

I'm not even sure why they picked her to headline a title, out of all the Wildstorm characters they could have picked. I mean yeah, she's very attractive, but who isn't? One of the Stormwatch ladies could very well give a more interesting tale.

Justice4243 · 2013-07-20 01:34:43

Is it just me, or is Voodoo basically completely unlikable?

She murders basically everyone she meets, even those that would probably cooperate or help her.

I mean...we're suppose to root for her, why? Because she's had a tough life? Because she didn't ask to become a kick-ass, shape-sifting, telepathic, killing machine?

It's not like she's pulled a Swamp Thing and made the best out of a bad situation by helping everyone she meets...unless helping them into an early grave helps.

At this point, she's as much a villain as those after her and by all accounts deserves to be taken out.

lee4hmz · 2013-07-20 01:39:42

Or give her LOTSA POUCHES and have her blow stuff up randomly. It'd have to be better than what I've seen so far.

Odradek · 2013-07-20 12:11:59

Justice42 said:
Is it just me, or is Voodoo basically completely unlikable?

She murders basically everyone she meets, even those that would probably cooperate or help her.

I mean...we're suppose to root for her, why? Because she's had a tough life? Because she didn't ask to become a kick-ass, shape-sifting, telepathic, killing machine?

It's not like she's pulled a Swamp Thing and made the best out of a bad situation by helping everyone she meets...unless helping them into an early grave helps.

At this point, she's as much a villain as those after her and by all accounts deserves to be taken out.

I wonder what it says that I've been reading this comic for five issues now and the question of whom I'm supposed to sympathize with hasn't occurred to me.

What's with those fasho continuity nietzschecomix? OR Odradek reads New 52

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