Naney's Impromptu Reviews
Episode I: RICOS NACHO CHEESE SAUCE (also shitty fries)
I am sitting here in a Super Target, having ordered a basket of fries and, out of curiosity, opted to get a 50 cent container of “nacho cheese” to go with it. This room temperature cheese-like concoction comes in a small tub that, ironically enough, bears an uncanny resemblance to one of those containers healthy digestive yogurt. There is a disturbing lack of health information on the package apart from the far from reassuring claim that it contains NO TRANSFATS! (of course omitting that it probably contains twice the suggested daily sodium intake for an adult male horse). Were I a wiser, older man I would not eat this, but, in the oft repeated words of Drake, YOLO. Now the woman at the counter (overweight, cheerful, African American, looks to be in her early 20s) has come over with my basket of fries, and my arteries commence their trial by fire. I have peeled open the container to reveal the homogenous, Kraft-Singles yellow, pseudo-cheese and have dug in. It surpasses my expectations, having hints of actual cheddar cheese flavor, and the spice is not overly gratuitous, with actual overtones of jalapeño. Unfortunately, it does seem to be every bit as salty as I had feared. The fries are far worse though, tasting of fryer grease and culinary shame, prompting me to smoother every last one in the quasi-fromage.
All in all, I think I got my 2 bucks worth of food-court like enjoyment, but I think I would have been better off spending the money elsewhere.
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