STOPPING: * no stopping on school days from 7:30am-4pm, unless it's 7:30-8am and you're here for school business, in which you can stop for up to 15 minutes. * no stopping between 6pm Friday and midnight Sunday. If you have a district permit you're exempt from this rule.
PARKING: * no parking on Tuesdays from 11am-1pm because there's street cleaning. * on school days, you can park only for up to an hour, during 4pm-6pm, and you can't claim both hours separately. If you have a district 4 permit, you're exempt from this rule. * on non-school days, you can park for up to one hour, during midnight to 6pm, and you can't claim more than one hour a day.
You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
We just need to change all traffic signs to digital signage that specifically says whether or not you can park right then.
Not okay? Sign is red and says "NO PARKING" Small sub sign underneath: "Parking next available from x to x time" in yellow
okay but only for an hour? Sign is green and says "1 HOUR PARKING"
Okay but for less than an hour, as it will be restricted soon? Sign is green and says "X MIN PARKING"
We live in the future dammit.
I was thinking about this again for some reason and it occurred to me that you don't even really need modern technology to make it work. You could theoretically have done a variable-message parking sign with '50s or '60s technology, though it would admittedly be way cheaper to do it nowadays.
If I were going to do it 60 years ago, I would mount neon signs that display either "1 HR PARKING" or "NO PARKING" as appropriate. To control them, I'd have them hooked up to a centralized timer, probably electromechanical in nature, with the sole purpose of switching the two signs on and off as appropriate. This really wouldn't be all that different from how old-timey traffic signal controllers worked, even!
Comments
STOPPING:
* no stopping on school days from 7:30am-4pm, unless it's 7:30-8am and you're here for school business, in which you can stop for up to 15 minutes.
* no stopping between 6pm Friday and midnight Sunday. If you have a district permit you're exempt from this rule.
PARKING:
* no parking on Tuesdays from 11am-1pm because there's street cleaning.
* on school days, you can park only for up to an hour, during 4pm-6pm, and you can't claim both hours separately. If you have a district 4 permit, you're exempt from this rule.
* on non-school days, you can park for up to one hour, during midnight to 6pm, and you can't claim more than one hour a day.
Not okay? Sign is red and says "NO PARKING"
Small sub sign underneath: "Parking next available from x to x time" in yellow
okay but only for an hour? Sign is green and says "1 HOUR PARKING"
Okay but for less than an hour, as it will be restricted soon? Sign is green and says "X MIN PARKING"
We live in the future dammit.
If I were going to do it 60 years ago, I would mount neon signs that display either "1 HR PARKING" or "NO PARKING" as appropriate. To control them, I'd have them hooked up to a centralized timer, probably electromechanical in nature, with the sole purpose of switching the two signs on and off as appropriate. This really wouldn't be all that different from how old-timey traffic signal controllers worked, even!