Proof the UK is fake

Odradek · 2017-09-05 02:12:59

1: They say things like "boffins" and "nonce" and "blood pudding"

2: They have a queen(IMHO pretty suspect)

3: Harry Potter takes place there

4: They have a billion different accents, but only like, five square miles of land

5: There is no comprehensible way "Jezza" works as a nickname for someone named Jeremy

Imipolex G · 2017-09-05 02:15:48

6. During a riot, they stand in line to loot stores

Calica · 2017-09-05 03:48:21

7. Seriously, how does Jeremy become "Jezza"

Tatterhood · 2017-09-05 03:53:58

Well it's like this. You are tasked by the Council of Naming to come up with a short form for "Jeremy". The obvious things fail, with "Je" or "Jer" being hard to say and "Remy" sounding too French. Settling in for a long night, you order a pizza. Then, a flash of inspiration strikes! What if you shortened "Jeremy" to "Pizza"? Thinking yourself brilliant, you go to bed, but are awoken by the doorbell as the pizza you'd forgotten you'd ordered arrives. A feeling nags you that something is amiss, but you ignore it any play Skyrim. Eventually, you go to bed, for real this time, but no sooner do you settle down than you realize that in fact, shortening "Jeremy" to "Pizza" doesn't make any sense!

But you're really tired by this point so you just mash the two together and call it a night.

glennmagusharvey · 2017-09-05 04:25:01

Tatterhood said:
Well it's like this. You are tasked by the Council of Naming to come up with a short form for "Jeremy". The obvious things fail, with "Je" or "Jer" being hard to say and "Remy" sounding too French. Settling in for a long night, you order a pizza. Then, a flash of inspiration strikes! What if you shortened "Jeremy" to "Pizza"? Thinking yourself brilliant, you go to bed, but are awoken by the doorbell as the pizza you'd forgotten you'd ordered arrives. A feeling nags you that something is amiss, but you ignore it any play Skyrim. Eventually, you go to bed, for real this time, but no sooner do you settle down than you realize that in fact, shortening "Jeremy" to "Pizza" doesn't make any sense!

But you're really tired by this point so you just mash the two together and call it a night.

oh gosh this is win

Tachyon · 2017-09-06 18:29:51

it's actually a pretty common way of forming nicknames over here

"Cozza" for Coralie and "Lozza" for Lauren are ones i've encountered, and i distinctly remember the old Nintendo Magazine (NOM UK) calling Mario "Mazza"

most famously there was "Gazza", for Paul Gascoigne.

Crystal · 2017-09-06 18:39:31

No wonder Tensei is such a strange, strange girl.

Fossilmaiden · 2017-09-06 18:51:16

Odradek said:
1: They say things like "boffins" and "nonce" and "blood pudding"

Oh please.

It's black pudding.

Odradek · 2017-09-06 18:52:22

Tachyon said:
it's actually a pretty common way of forming nicknames over here

"Cozza" for Coralie and "Lozza" for Lauren are ones i've encountered, and i distinctly remember the old Nintendo Magazine (NOM UK) calling Mario "Mazza"

most famously there was "Gazza", for Paul Gascoigne.

Got it, Bozza

MetaFour · 2017-09-06 18:54:02

Tachyon said:
it's actually a pretty common way of forming nicknames over here

"Cozza" for Coralie and "Lozza" for Lauren are ones i've encountered, and i distinctly remember the old Nintendo Magazine (NOM UK) calling Mario "Mazza"

most famously there was "Gazza", for Paul Gascoigne.

I always wondered how Morrissey became "Moz". I guess this explains everything.

Imipolex G · 2017-09-06 19:33:14

Probably also this guy. Although I think he may be Australian?

yeah, I chose that particular video on purpose. What of it

Tatterhood · 2017-09-06 19:35:11

Tachyon said:
it's actually a pretty common way of forming nicknames over here

"Cozza" for Coralie and "Lozza" for Lauren are ones i've encountered, and i distinctly remember the old Nintendo Magazine (NOM UK) calling Mario "Mazza"

most famously there was "Gazza", for Paul Gascoigne.

man no offence to the person in question but "coralie" is already a weird name and "cozza" sounds like some kind of cheese-based dish

Imipolex G · 2017-09-06 19:35:28

Coralie is a good name

Tatterhood · 2017-09-06 19:37:09

Yeah I see nothing wrong with that name, it's just that like there's something strange about hearing "<weird nickname> short for <weird name>" especially when the two don't even sound all that similar.

Alduin · 2017-09-06 19:52:07

if the UK is fake then who conquered 24% of the world???

Tatterhood · 2017-09-06 19:53:16

Alduin said:
if the UK is fake then who conquered 24% of the world???

aliens

Fossilmaiden · 2017-09-06 19:54:22

If Europa Universalis is historically accurate, and it totally is, the Ainu.

Odradek · 2017-09-06 19:56:23

Alduin said:
if the UK is fake then who conquered 24% of the world???

Tatterhood said:

Alduin said:
if the UK is fake then who conquered 24% of the world???
aliens

glennmagusharvey · 2017-09-06 20:36:59

So are Jezza, Cozza, etc. pronounced with a stop between the two syllables, the way pizza is? (i.e. PEET tsah)

Sredni Vashtar · 2017-09-06 20:40:29

Fossilmaiden said:
If Europa Universalis is historically accurate, and it totally is, the Ainu.

Something tells me I should put either a clip from X explaining the Dragons of Heaven and Earth thing or R.E.M.'s "Man on the Moon" here and I'm not sure why.

Tre · 2017-09-06 21:35:37

glennmagusharvey said:
So are Jezza, Cozza, etc. pronounced with a stop between the two syllables, the way pizza is? (i.e. PEET tsah)

nah, it's just a "z' sound, at least for Jezza

Tachyon · 2017-09-07 04:14:03

Tre is correct (it's not just Jezza).

Odradek said:

Tachyon said:
it's actually a pretty common way of forming nicknames over here

"Cozza" for Coralie and "Lozza" for Lauren are ones i've encountered, and i distinctly remember the old Nintendo Magazine (NOM UK) calling Mario "Mazza"

most famously there was "Gazza", for Paul Gascoigne.
Got it, Bozza

Haha. :)

i've never gotten that one, and i think it's cuz there's implicit rules about how nicknames are formed. In my experience the -zza nicknames are only given to people for whom the consonant immediately after after the first vowel in their names is either an s, an r or a z. So Bozza wouldn't do for Bobby, but could work for Boris, Bosco or Boruto.

i have gotten 'Bobs' from time to time, which is probably the closest equivalent.

Imipolex G · 2017-09-07 04:19:03

how about Bobert

Tachyon · 2017-09-07 04:19:56

have gotten

Imipolex G · 2017-09-07 04:30:15

excellent

Calica · 2017-09-07 05:19:29

Tachyon said:
it's actually a pretty common way of forming nicknames over here

"Cozza" for Coralie and "Lozza" for Lauren are ones i've encountered, and i distinctly remember the old Nintendo Magazine (NOM UK) calling Mario "Mazza"

most famously there was "Gazza", for Paul Gascoigne.

i'm going to assume that @tatterhood's explanation is correct, just for all of those. especially mario

Sredni Vashtar · 2017-09-07 06:08:55

The r -> z thing is interesting given how those two consonants form this weird continuum in a lot of languages, rz in Polish and r in Mandarin coming to mind, plus that ludicrous ř trill/fricative thing in Czech (i.e. why Dvořak's name is approximated as "d'-VOR-zhack"). I assume it's because of where the tongue is and how voiced fricatives and approximants tend to blur a bit.

Tre · 2017-09-07 16:53:54

Trevor "Trezza" Listman

Proof the UK is fake

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