conversation in my household
my sister: Oh, Emile, today at work, I was told that my relationship was unhealthy.
Me: (*waits expectantly*)
sister: Yeah, this coworker of mine, he told me that because i'm not comfortable with the idea of (her boyfriend's name expunged) having sex with other women, it means i'm insecure and posessive.
(*we exchange glances and gesticulate*)
me: wait wait, you mean like, in a hypothetical or a literal sense?...
sister: (*her Most Serious face*) In a literal sense. He tells me this, and I turn to my other coworker, and he agrees with him.
(*at this point, im in the kitchen pouring myself a glass of eggnog*)
sister: and then later, we were talking, and he was like "women really shouldn't be uncomfortable with their boyfriends having other girl friends" and I was like "does your girlfriend have any guy friends?" and then he said "Oh no, she doesn't, i'm really lucky"
(*we both laugh*)
me: that's what we in psychology call a double standard.
(*beat*)
me: you should totally ask these guys for their opinions of feminism I bet they're a trea-
sister: oh, he's totally a feminist. well, he considers himself a feminist.
mom, who has been listening from the other room this whole time: He sounds Woke.
sister: Oh yeah, he's totally woke.
Me: (*waits expectantly*)
sister: Yeah, this coworker of mine, he told me that because i'm not comfortable with the idea of (her boyfriend's name expunged) having sex with other women, it means i'm insecure and posessive.
(*we exchange glances and gesticulate*)
me: wait wait, you mean like, in a hypothetical or a literal sense?...
sister: (*her Most Serious face*) In a literal sense. He tells me this, and I turn to my other coworker, and he agrees with him.
(*at this point, im in the kitchen pouring myself a glass of eggnog*)
sister: and then later, we were talking, and he was like "women really shouldn't be uncomfortable with their boyfriends having other girl friends" and I was like "does your girlfriend have any guy friends?" and then he said "Oh no, she doesn't, i'm really lucky"
(*we both laugh*)
me: that's what we in psychology call a double standard.
(*beat*)
me: you should totally ask these guys for their opinions of feminism I bet they're a trea-
sister: oh, he's totally a feminist. well, he considers himself a feminist.
mom, who has been listening from the other room this whole time: He sounds Woke.
sister: Oh yeah, he's totally woke.
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Comments
well
the sort of person who claims to be a feminist but doesnt want their significant other to have male friends
the phrase i want to use is "virtue signalling"
but even more willfully oblivious than it usually is
Assassin poems, Poems that shoot
guns. Poems that wrestle cops into alleys
and take their weapons leaving them dead