You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
i have not watched this in any capacity for quite literally years, so i was actually surprised by just how bad some of these lines are?
"from my point of view, the Jedi are evil!"
i mean
how did that end up getting the go-ahead from hundreds of people and end up in the final cut of a film
The thing that always bugged me is that there were plenty of legitimate and believable reasons for people to have a negative opinion of the Jedi and for Anakin in particular to. (I'll get to those further down.)
But Lucas decided to go with "I'm just going to take Palpatine at his word that if I do everything he tells me to, he'll make sure Padme doesn't die, so I'm all evil and crazy now. Oh, and then I'll Force-choke Padme, the person I was doing all this to save, because I'm just that insane now."
The other thing I loathed--and this is despite the fact that I think despite being depressing as fuck, ROTS is the best-written of the prequels--is that Anakin is literally burning alive and Obi-Wan just stands there. He doesn't try to save him or take him prisoner, he doesn't Force-Pull him away from the lava and then end his suffering with swing of the lightsaber. I know that he killed a lot of children--excuse me, "younglings"--but Jesus fuck, dude, good guys aren't supposed to be that cruel.
Okay, here are believable reasons for Anakin to betray the Jedi that would work better, in my opinion, than "Because nightmares about Padme, and because Dark Side."
"Oh, hello Obi-Wan. Tell me, does this come as a surprise to you?
"Well, it shouldn't. When you and Qui-Gon found me, my mother and I were slaves. Qui-Gon made me think that being a Jedi would finally give me control over my life, when my whole life before then had been spent taking orders and taking abuse. So I went with him. You didn't take my mother, though. Oh sure, you had enough money to buy her freedom, but you weren't interested. After all, she wasn't important, because she wasn't your 'Chosen One'.
"I spent years taking more orders and more abuse, with you people telling me that I couldn't allow myself to feel, that I had to be uncaring and robotic. Love leads to the dark side, you told me.
"I hated every minute of it, but I still stayed, because I thought one day I'd finally advance and not have to be anybody's lackey any more.
"Remember a few years ago when I had visions of my mother being in danger, and you Jedi not only wouldn't help me, but told me I shouldn't think about it? Because of that, I didn't check on her in time. Because of that, she was killed.
"Then, this year, I had visions of Padme dying. I talked to Yoda about it. You know what he told me? He told me that I should 'rejoice' at the prospect of losing my wife! What kind of sick thinking is that?!
"For that matter, what kind of 'heroes' keep children and their parents apart, because attachment to anything might lead them to the dark side?
"You pretend to be defenders of the people, but you don't really care about any of them. Not even people who matter to one of your own. So I've had enough of the Jedi Order. I'm happy I left, I'm happy it's almost dead and gone, and I'll be happy to kill you."
Pat The NES Punk and his friend Ian have a podcast, and one of the things they covered a little while ago was George Lucas explaining why he decided to have Han shoot first and why it's bullshit.
I agree with pretty much all of it, but I'd add that if Lucas really thought that he needed to make Han some kind of paragon because "Oh, he's marrying Leia, so it's better if he never does anything bad", there's a very simple way to fix it that requires no retconning whatsoever:
Just say that Han used to be kind of a scumbag, which is why he was working for a scumbag like Jabba in the first place, but hanging out with the Rebels was a good influence on him and he became a better person. If Darth Vader can go from being a pure villain to a good guy, then surely Han can go from being kind of anti-heroic to being a good guy, right?
Also, when I heard that Lucas was complaining about how Disney didn't use any of the ideas he gave them for Episode VII and that he felt like he sold his kids to white slavers, I couldn't believe it. It isn't like Disney put a gun to your head and forced you to sign over the rights there, George. (Well, at least I don't assume so. You never know with Disney.)
When I rewatched the Prequels for the first time since elementary school last December my takeaway was that the ONLY memorable/good action setpiece was the end of The Phantom Menace
I thought there were only like three sith. Anakin was on the right track
There were two Sith at a time and a lot of Jedi.
There used to be way more Sith, but apparently the Sith believe the Force works via conservation of ninjutsu laws.
Furthermore, after Anakin betrayed the Jedi, there were two Jedi and two Sith, thus making things equal.
the two sith at a time isn't because of conservation of ninjutsu though, but because sith are backstabbing assholes and decided it's easier not to deal with having more than one person who can backstab you
I thought there were only like three sith. Anakin was on the right track
There were two Sith at a time and a lot of Jedi.
There used to be way more Sith, but apparently the Sith believe the Force works via conservation of ninjutsu laws.
Furthermore, after Anakin betrayed the Jedi, there were two Jedi and two Sith, thus making things equal.
the two sith at a time isn't because of conservation of ninjutsu though, but because sith are backstabbing assholes and decided it's easier not to deal with having more than one person who can backstab you
Drew Karpyshyn wrote the novel about Darth Bane changing how Sith worked and killing off everybody else in the order so that there could only be two at a time from then on. Which makes sense, since he wrote the KOTOR games, in which there are lots and lots of Sith, so it was fitting that he be the one to tell the story of how things changed.
I thought there were only like three sith. Anakin was on the right track
There were two Sith at a time and a lot of Jedi.
There used to be way more Sith, but apparently the Sith believe the Force works via conservation of ninjutsu laws.
Furthermore, after Anakin betrayed the Jedi, there were two Jedi and two Sith, thus making things equal.
the two sith at a time isn't because of conservation of ninjutsu though, but because sith are backstabbing assholes and decided it's easier not to deal with having more than one person who can backstab you
Drew Karpyshyn wrote the novel about Darth Bane changing how Sith worked and killing off everybody else in the order so that there could only be two at a time from then on. Which makes sense, since he wrote the KOTOR games, in which there are lots and lots of Sith, so it was fitting that he be the one to tell the story of how things changed.
Comments
Nobody.
He never made that mistake again.