Twist Your Favorites! Convince Someone Of The Good In What You Hate!

edited 2016-05-15 18:15:54 in Roleplay & Games
Do we have a thread for this stuff? I haven't bothered to check, but I like the idea. It's pretty self-explanatory: Act like you're talking to someone about something you love and make it sound awful, or the reverse! Anything goes media-wise, though this is supposed to be playfully tongue-in-cheek and with some liberties (see below for the latter), so don't make this a place where your biases and whatnot can be used for bashing, aight?

Anyway: The world is destroyed and you have to listen to some bastard narrate everything you say and do, he never goes away, and your character barely speaks. How're you supposed to understand his character? This isn't Pokemon, that's garbage! And what's worse, there're barely any characters except until the very end where someone acts like a jackass. Talk about shoehorning in verisimilitude. I'm talking about Bastion.

Comments

  • Touch the cow. Do it now.
    Unless you like instrumental noodling, annoyingly high-pitched vocals and pretentious "philosophical" narratives, I suggest you do not listen to Rush

    meanwhile, you have to admire the straightforward accessibility of a no-nonsense rock band like Nickelback
  • imagei will watch the heck outta this pumpkin patch
    Steven Universe: literally a show about rocks

    What's next, CN?  A show about watching paint dry?
  • confusing lesbian melodrama with people who turn into bears
  • FromSoftware's recent series of games, ranging from Demon's Souls to Dark Souls 3, are beyond obtuse. They do nothing to illustrate anything beyond the most basic game mechanics, which becomes tiresome as soon as any player stumbles upon any kind of difficult combat encounter. While the aesthetic faithfully reproduces various historical architectures and equipment with only moderate exaggeration, this can only be a laudable achievement in a vacuum; video games excel at presenting us with the abstract and fantastical, whereas these games actively suppress those aspects during a player's formative experiences. 

    A lack of strict character classes can lead players to lose focus as they build characters, leading to situations where improper stat investment creates unnecessary difficulty. FromSoftware would do well to take notes from conventional RPGs, where the class systems themselves behave like silent tutorials. 

    The difficulty of combat is compounded by the inclusion of resource management via the stamina bar, which depletes when one attacks, blocks, or evades. Such a difficult series of games has no reason to impose additional limitations on players, especially when the outcome commonly entails being unable to defend oneself after a sequence of attacks. 

    Gear acquisition is both arbitrarily slow and complex. While one picks up new gear on a regular basis, weapons within each class are barely distinguishable from one-another in terms of combat properties. There's no reason later weapon pickups aren't at least moderate upgrades over earlier equivalents, especially given the distance there can be between new equipment pickups.  
  • We can do anything if we do it together.
    A show about six characters who all look alike. How am I supposed to figure out who’s who?

    Also, they’re all jerks. How am I supposed to relate to them?

    I’ve also heard that the first episode is reference-heavy. Reference humour is a crutch that hacks use when they can’t tell real jokes.
  • edited 2016-05-16 14:18:34
    For once, or maybe twice, I was in my prime.
    A music genre for brass and reed players who can't write their own music and just do covers of other people's songs. Half the time they don't even get the notes right, either! It's infuriating.
  • THIS MACHINE KILLS FASCISTS
    The first chapter is about a kid playing around in his room. Nothing of import seems to happen until about 4 chapters in. And then the story starts over twice with different characters.
  • edited 2016-05-16 17:31:13
    Splat Charger Specialist
    A game series in which the unspeaking, aryan protagonist and his progeny and/or reincarnations are chosen to rescue an equally aryan princess from the clutches of a sometimes pig/sometimes brown wizard-thief. But aryan hero doesn't always fight brown pig sorcerer-thief, sometimes he fights:
    • A phallic demon.
    • A plant demon.
    • A mask demon.
    • A nightmare demon.
    • A bull demon.
    • An effeminate wind sorcerer.
    • A blue-skinned sorceress and tin-plated demon general who turn out to be part of a plot to revive brown pig-man anyway.
    • A blue-skinned tin-plated usurper sorcerer who turns out to be part of a plot to revive brown pig-man anyway.
    • His own shadow. Who was already known to be part of a plot to revive brown pig-man.
  • “I'm surprised. Those clothes… but, aren't you…?”
    Twenty-two episodes of relentless trudge with a cast of hateful sociopaths and a protagonist who acts with all the emotional range and intellect of a rabid dog whose primary foils have all the emotional flavour and colour of cottage cheese—including a little girl who manages to simultaneously hit the Damsel-in-Distress, Seer Waif, Doomed Innocent and Creepy Child tropes in the same go without actually doing anything. And the ending renders everything completely meaningless. All the gore and backstabbing and general shittiness? Pointless. The two main villains don't even have anything to do with one another. They're just horrible because. There are maybe two things you could call jokes, and they're not even funny; it's all played deadly straight. And did I mention that there's no colour? Oh, sure, it's in colour, but it's washed out to the point that it basically could all be beige and would you even notice? No. Guuuh.

    (I am, of course, describing Texhnolyze, which is maybe one of my favourite shows ever.)
  • TreTre
    edited 2016-05-17 06:23:40
    image
    Why would anyone like this game? It's short, the story is stupid, the character designs are weird, neither you nor the bad guy get any character development, and the best part of it is literally just cutting rocks into smaller pieces. The whole game's about a pair of underwear, for Christ's sake -- if I wanted to make taking undergarments fun I'd just ransack someone's panty drawer! What a snoozefest.

    If you need me, I'll be off ruining some 12-year-olds' killstreaks and working on my sixth Prestige with my custom SCUF controller. Better get myself a keg of Monster first, though-- it takes premium fuel to top those scoreboards, and plain ol' soda won't cut it for a master like yours tru-- oh my god what the Fuck did I just type
  • “I'm surprised. Those clothes… but, aren't you…?”
    And then Tre was a Codpiece.
  • BeeBee
    edited 2016-05-17 07:37:59
    so there's these people who make farty noises into big phallic metal tubes


    (I really need to get back into playing.  I miss it so much.)

    (And on that note, this is probably the truest picture in approximately ever.)
  • edited 2016-05-17 16:53:19
    THIS MACHINE KILLS FASCISTS
    (re that pic: you just started some SICK FIRES BRO)
Sign In or Register to comment.