which kind of white person are you (or if you arent white what type would you be if you were)

edited 2016-01-18 18:14:48 in General
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  • My dreams exceed my real life
    Dead
  • that's not an option

    ....

    ok fine, you can be JR, he got shot one time so that's kinda close right?
  • the kind that's not a stereotype
  • the kind that's not a stereotype

    oh cmoooooooooooooooooooonnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn
  • southern politician
  • Acererak said:

    southern politician

    by the grace of God
  • My dreams exceed my real life
    the-toast.net/2015/05/12/books-that-literally-all-white-men-own/
  • edited 2016-01-18 19:16:13

    1. Shogun, James Clavell

    2. Slaughterhouse-Five, Kurt Vonnegut

    3. A Confederacy of Dunces, John Kennedy Toole

    4. Infinite Jest, David Foster Wallace

    5. A collection of John Lennon’s drawings.

    6. A Farewell to Arms, Ernest Hemingway

    7. The first two volumes of A Song of Ice and Fire, George R.R. Martin

    8. God Is Not Great, Christopher Hitchens

    9. Catch-22, Joseph Heller

    10. I Hope They Serve Beer In Hell, Tucker Max

    11. Atlas Shrugged, Ayn Rand

    12. The Man Who Mistook His Wife For A Hat, Oliver Sacks

    13. The Catcher in the Rye, J.D. Salinger

    14. The Godfather, Mario Puzo

    15. The Great Gatsby, F. Scott Fitzgerald

    16. Lolita, Vladimir Nabokov

    17. Fight Club, Chuck Palahniuk

    18. The Master and Margarita, Mikhail Bulgakov


    19. The Da Vinci Code, Dan Brown (i own this in audiobook format because i found it lying on the sidewalk) 
    20. The Grapes of Wrath, John Steinbeck

    21. The Stand, Stephen King

    22. The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo, Stieg Larsson

    23. The Naked and the Dead, Norman Mailer

    24. Tuesdays With Morrie, Mitch Albom

    25. It’s Not About the Bike, Lance Armstrong (definitely under the bed)

    26. Who Moved My Cheese?, Spencer Johnson

    27. Portnoy’s Complaint, Philip Roth

    28. Seabiscuit, Laura Hillenbrand

    29. John Adams, David McCullough

    30. Ragtime, E.L. Doctorow

    31. Lucky Jim, Kingsley Amis

    32. America: The Book, Jon Stewart

    33. The World Is Flat, Thomas Friedman

    34. The Tipping Point, Malcolm Gladwell

    35. The Curious Incident of the Dog In the Night-Time, Mark Haddon

    36. Exodus, Leon Uris (if Jewish)

    37. Trinity, Leon Uris (if Irish-American)

    38. The Road, Cormac McCarthy

    39. Marley & Me, John Grogan

    40. Freakonomics, Steven D. Levitt

    41. The Rainmaker, John Grisham

    42. Patriot Games, Tom Clancy

    43. Dragon, Clive Cussler

    44. Guns, Germs, and Steel, Jared Diamond

    45. The Agony and the Ecstasy, Irving Stone

    46. The 9/11 Commission Report

    47. The Spy Who Came In From the Cold, John le Carre

    48. Rising Sun, Michael Crichton

    49. A Walk in the Woods, Bill Bryson

    50. Airport, Arthur Hailey

    51. Rich Dad, Poor Dad, Robert Kiyosaki

    52. Burr, Gore Vidal

    53. Angela’s Ashes, Frank McCourt

    54. The Wheel of Time, Robert Jordan

    55. Into Thin Air, Jon Krakauer

    56. Into the Wild, Jon Krakauer

    57. Cryptonomicon, Neal Stephenson

    58. Godel, Escher, Bach, Douglas Hofstadter

    59. The World According to Garp, John Irving

    60. A Brief History of Time, Stephen Hawking

    61. The Tin Drum, Gunter Grass

    62. On the Road, Jack Kerouac

    63. Lord of the Flies, William Golding

    64. The Lord of the Rings, JRR Tolkien

    65. The Bonfire of the Vanities, Tom Wolfe

    66. Beowulf, the Seamus Heaney translation


    67. Rabbit, Run, John Updike

    68. The Satanic Verses, Salman Rushdie

    69. The Complete Sherlock Holmes, Sir Arthur Conan Doyle

    70. The Big Sleep, Raymond Chandler

    71. One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest, Ken Kesey

    72. A Clockwork Orange, Anthony Burgess

    73. House of Leaves, Mark Danielewski

    74. The Call of the Wild, Jack London

    75. Gravity’s Rainbow, Thomas Pynchon

    76. I, Claudius, Robert Graves

    77. The Civil War: A Narrative, Shelby Foote

    78. American Psycho, Bret Easton Ellis (a glaring omission from the original, pointed out by Naomi Fry)

    79. Life, Keith Richards
  • TreTre
    edited 2016-01-18 19:18:46
    image
    RiFF RaFF
  • ...Everything I own on that list is something my dad bought me

    except for GEB. My mom bought me that because it's one of her favorites.

    and The Da Vinci Code, for the aforementioned reason

    also I own Quicksilver, not Cryptonomicon.

    Got them mixed up because i have read neither.
  • meow meow meowtherfuckers
    no art of war or h.p lovecraft? not even a single murakami book? 
  • Touch the cow. Do it now.
    I own eleven of those books.

    Anyway, I'm probably closest to the goth or maybe the mythical gothprep.
  • Epitome said:

    no art of war or h.p lovecraft? not even a single murakami book? 

    those are definitely glaring omissions
  • Touch the cow. Do it now.
    books that literally all black men own
  • TreTre
    edited 2016-01-27 07:40:02
    image
    also I'm pretty sure that fusing a goth dude and a wanksta wouldn't get you Macklemore 

    that would be the members of the band Brokencyde 

    (also maybe Attila)
  • ...Everything I own on that list is something my dad bought me

    this is really weirding me out tbh

    because not only is this the case, but im pretty sure he's read everything on this list that i dont own as well
  • Touch the cow. Do it now.
    your dad is a white guy, I take it
  • The Wheel of Time
    gonna have to be more specific there
  • edited 2016-01-18 19:42:13
    My dreams exceed my real life

    ...Everything I own on that list is something my dad bought me

    this is really weirding me out tbh

    because not only is this the case, but im pretty sure he's read everything on this list that i dont own as well
    It's a bunch of books that are indicative of a vague white dude culture, though it's a vague white dude culture that was more in vogue 20 years ago, thus, your dad.

    And a more honest version of this would probably include Toni Morrison's Beloved and Ralph Ellison's Invisible Man.
  • those are both books my mom likes, along with GEB and Gravity's Rainbow
  • Touch the cow. Do it now.
    Gravity's Rainbow should be owned by everyone, including squids
  • edited 2016-01-18 19:52:36

    which in turn makes me wonder whether the list is "white dudes" as much as it is "people who would have been in college 20-30 years ago"?
  • My dreams exceed my real life

    which in turn makes me wonder whether the list is "white dudes" as much as it is "people who would have been in college 20-30 years ago"?

    It's probably the latter.

    White dudes have been um actuallying Catcher in the Rye since the Reagan administration.
  • Vampire Lady of Corvidia

    (The other Jane)

    OP deleted so original post on my blog


    anyways im the mythical gothprep
    the gothprep was lucius malfoy
  • imagei will watch the heck outta this pumpkin patch
    i have GEB, The Master and Margarita, The Big Sleep, the first volume of ASoIaF (but not the second), A Brief History of Time, The Lord of the Rings, House of Leaves and all the canonical Sherlock Holmes stories, though not in a single volume compilation

    my dad has a fair few of the books on that list but i think this has more to do with his being an English teacher
  • Corvina said:

    OP deleted so original post on my blog


    anyways im the mythical gothprep
    the gothprep was lucius malfoy
    tru
  • imagei will watch the heck outta this pumpkin patch
    couldn't that equally apply to Draco?
  • I am a goth and I put my middle finger up at preps.
  • “I'm surprised. Those clothes… but, aren't you…?”
    I am probably the highly unstable gothprep myself, although the chart fails to include "simpering basement geek," which would permit four further highly dangerous fusions.
  • 1. Shogun, James Clavell
    READ (MEH) 2. Slaughterhouse-Five, Kurt Vonnegut
    3. A Confederacy of Dunces, John Kennedy Toole
    4. Infinite Jest, David Foster Wallace
    5. A collection of John Lennon’s drawings.
    6. A Farewell to Arms, Ernest Hemingway
    7. The first two volumes of A Song of Ice and Fire, George R.R. Martin
    8. God Is Not Great, Christopher Hitchens
    READ (ENJOYED), OWN 9. Catch-22, Joseph Heller
    10. I Hope They Serve Beer In Hell, Tucker Max
    11. Atlas Shrugged, Ayn Rand
    12. The Man Who Mistook His Wife For A Hat, Oliver Sacks
    READ (MEH), OWN 13. The Catcher in the Rye, J.D. Salinger
    14. The Godfather, Mario Puzo
    READ (DON'T LIKE) 15. The Great Gatsby, F. Scott Fitzgerald
    16. Lolita, Vladimir Nabokov
    17. Fight Club, Chuck Palahniuk
    18. The Master and Margarita, Mikhail Bulgakov
    19. The Da Vinci Code, Dan Brown
    WANT TO READ 20. The Grapes of Wrath, John Steinbeck
    21. The Stand, Stephen King
    22. The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo, Stieg Larsson
    23. The Naked and the Dead, Norman Mailer
    24. Tuesdays With Morrie, Mitch Albom
    25. It’s Not About the Bike, Lance Armstrong (definitely under the bed)
    26. Who Moved My Cheese?, Spencer Johnson
    27. Portnoy’s Complaint, Philip Roth
    28. Seabiscuit, Laura Hillenbrand
    29. John Adams, David McCullough
    30. Ragtime, E.L. Doctorow
    31. Lucky Jim, Kingsley Amis
    32. America: The Book, Jon Stewart
    33. The World Is Flat, Thomas Friedman
    WANT TO READ 34. The Tipping Point, Malcolm Gladwell
    35. The Curious Incident of the Dog In the Night-Time, Mark Haddon
    36. Exodus, Leon Uris (if Jewish)
    37. Trinity, Leon Uris (if Irish-American)
    38. The Road, Cormac McCarthy
    39. Marley & Me, John Grogan
    40. Freakonomics, Steven D. Levitt
    41. The Rainmaker, John Grisham
    GET OUT TOM THE ONLY THING YOU'RE GOOD FOR IS CORN CHIPS 42. Patriot Games, Tom Clancy
    43. Dragon, Clive Cussler
    HAVE HEARD THIS IS GOOD 44. Guns, Germs, and Steel, Jared Diamond
    45. The Agony and the Ecstasy, Irving Stone
    46. The 9/11 Commission Report
    47. The Spy Who Came In From the Cold, John le Carre
    YOU TOO, TAKE YOUR CLIMATE DENIAL AND SHOVE IT 48. Rising Sun, Michael Crichton
    49. A Walk in the Woods, Bill Bryson
    50. Airport, Arthur Hailey
    51. Rich Dad, Poor Dad, Robert Kiyosaki
    52. Burr, Gore Vidal
    53. Angela’s Ashes, Frank McCourt
    OWN A TABLETOP RPG IMPLEMENTATION OF THIS 54. The Wheel of Time, Robert Jordan
    55. Into Thin Air, Jon Krakauer
    56. Into the Wild, Jon Krakauer
    57. Cryptonomicon, Neal Stephenson
    HAVE HEARD THIS IS GOOD 58. Godel, Escher, Bach, Douglas Hofstadter
    59. The World According to Garp, John Irving
    HAVE HEARD THIS IS GOOD 60. A Brief History of Time, Stephen Hawking
    61. The Tin Drum, Gunter Grass
    62. On the Road, Jack Kerouac
    READ (ENJOYED), OWN 63. Lord of the Flies, William Golding
    WATCHED MOVIES (BUT NOT READ), OWN 2ND BOOK 64. The Lord of the Rings, JRR Tolkien
    65. The Bonfire of the Vanities, Tom Wolfe
    READ (MEH?) 66. Beowulf, the Seamus Heaney translation
    67. Rabbit, Run, John Updike
    68. The Satanic Verses, Salman Rushdie
    READ SOME OF (ENJOYED), HAVE 69. The Complete Sherlock Holmes, Sir Arthur Conan Doyle
    70. The Big Sleep, Raymond Chandler
    CAN'T REMEMBER IF I'VE READ 71. One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest, Ken Kesey
    72. A Clockwork Orange, Anthony Burgess
    73. House of Leaves, Mark Danielewski
    74. The Call of the Wild, Jack London
    75. Gravity’s Rainbow, Thomas Pynchon
    76. I, Claudius, Robert Graves
    77. The Civil War: A Narrative, Shelby Foote
    78. American Psycho, Bret Easton Ellis (a glaring omission from the original, pointed out by Naomi Fry)
    79. Life, Keith Richards

    A Sand County Almanac by Aldo Lepold is missing.
  • edited 2016-01-18 21:43:51
    imagei will watch the heck outta this pumpkin patch
    i can imagine having any of numerous possible reactions to Slaughterhouse-Five, but "meh", really?
  • Tachyon said:

    i can imagine having any of numerous possible reactions to Slaughterhouse-Five, but "meh", really?

    I dunno why, it just didn't engage me.

    I know Billy became unstuck from time and developed a "meh" reaction (no joke intended) to a bunch of things, in the form of "So it goes.", and IIRC it has something to do with the Vietnam War, but it was just sorta...there.

    Unlike Lord of the Flies, for example, which I remember that I "felt".  Like, emotionally, as part of my own experience, I could feel immersed in the narrative.

    Though maybe at that time it also resonated with some difficulties I faced in my own life.  But how, I'm not sure.  I remember I had a big rash break out once when I was in high school and I read Lord of the Flies around that time.  I also wanted to tell this girl I liked her but I couldn't because I looked horrible.  Or something.  Thing is, though, none of that really has much to do with the story of Lord of the Flies, so I'm not really sure what to make of it.

    Or maybe, alternatively, our English class just covered it very well.  And didn't cover Slaughterhouse-Five as well.
  • imagei will watch the heck outta this pumpkin patch
    i can't remember whether Vietnam was referenced, but a large chunk of the novel happens in Dresden during WWII

    i never studied it in school
  • Touch the cow. Do it now.
    Mostly it was World War II, actually. Although Vietnam is mentioned.

    I liked that book. It engaged me thoroughly.
  • Touch the cow. Do it now.
    I was ninja'd
  • imagei will watch the heck outta this pumpkin patch
    faster than light

    faster than a speeding cow
  • “I'm surprised. Those clothes… but, aren't you…?”
    My mom is a huge Neal Stephenson and Gore Vidal fan, my dad loves James Clavell and John Irving, and since I went through a serious astrophysics phase we definitely have some Hawking.
  • Tachyon said:

    i can't remember whether Vietnam was referenced, but a large chunk of the novel happens in Dresden during WWII

    i never studied it in school

    Mostly it was World War II, actually. Although Vietnam is mentioned.

    I liked that book. It engaged me thoroughly.

    I might be confusing it with In the Lake of the Woods.
  • imagei will watch the heck outta this pumpkin patch
    Billy being unstuck in time is from Slaughterhouse-Five

    so is "so it goes"
  • The Vietnam thing I mean.

    But now that you mention it, I remember Dresden being a thing in either S5 or C22, and I can't seem to place it in C22 (they were in Italy IIRC) so it was probably S5.
  • Touch the cow. Do it now.
    I believe Billy Pilgrim's son is a soldier in Vietnam at one point? I actually can't quite remember.
  • “I'm surprised. Those clothes… but, aren't you…?”
    In the Lake of the Woods involves a political scandal and some Vietnam War stuff is in the background; Slaughterhouse-Five is about the bombing of Dresden and time travel.
  • Damnit, which book was it that I read that primarily involved an antiwar reaction to a U.S. soldier's experience Vietnam?
  • Touch the cow. Do it now.
    was it The Things They Carried
  • Touch the cow. Do it now.
    then I got nothin'
  • Splat Charger Specialist
    Isn't gothprep just high-end goth loli?
  • imagei will watch the heck outta this pumpkin patch
    goth and gothic lolita are different, and neither is really preppy

    i mean i guess i see where you're coming from

    like lolita fashion recalls kinda wealthy styles of dress but it's a sort of 19th century pastiche, elements of upper class English in there

    whereas prep is more contemporary ivy league
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