You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
Me: (*holding bad guy at wandpoint*) MOVE AND YOU'RE A LIZARD!
Ali: You're, uh, threatening people with your magic now?
Me: I don't see YOU trying to help us escape, now do I?
I remember when Jay Leno was going to save the Tonight Show from being old and dowdy. It worked...about as long as it took to get Arsenio Hall off the air. :P
You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
I always liked Conan better than Letterman but that's just me
He liked to argue in that Ivy-league, chess club kind of way -- "tropes"-this, "individuate"-that, "Derrida ...blah blah blah." But he managed to do it in a sexy, masculine way ... which made it refreshing.
sometimes i change my phone alarm to say "good morning mr kitty" on the lock screen because i think it'll cheer me up but then sometimes it just feels like it's mocking me so i change it back
You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
sometimes i change my phone alarm to say "good morning mr kitty" on the lock screen because i think it'll cheer me up but then sometimes it just feels like it's mocking me so i change it back
It's like if you took the story "One day, St George fought a dragon to save a princess. He won" the nightmare fuel page would always be something like "Imagine if you had to FIGHT a fire-breathing dragon! And they say this story is for KIDS"
Balls, alerted by an assistant to an article about him and urged to search Twitter for it, accidentally entered his intended search term in the wrong box and ended up sending a tweet saying "Ed Balls" on 28 April 2011. The unusual tweet was spotted and retweeted by thousands (Balls was unaware that it was possible to delete a tweet). The incident is now celebrated as 'Ed Balls Day' on its anniversary.[51] When invited to send something to be auctioned to raise funds for the party in 2015, Balls submitted a framed, signed printout of the tweet.[52]
the british government is comprised of the House of Ministers and Inn of the Lords. a lord is worth two votes while a minister makes tuppence. it is illegal not to be a minister. the queen can be summoned to the Chamber of Secrets by a consensus of lords and chamberlains, where she will execute a Hun and address grievances until she is beheaded or is called away by a Privy Chancellor.. every sunday there is a duel between the tories and the papists. a whig is permitted twenty votes, but only once a year. the “prime minister” is formed when the two Jammiest Bastards in the parliament share a wig at all times and speak with the same voice. half of the lords belong to the “shadow party” and are therefore immune to poisons but take double damage from fire and sun magic
oyu forgot that before parliament can do anything a guy comes round and tries to smash the doors down with a mace and everyone has to not let him in be really quiet and act like theyre not in and wait for him to go away before they can start making the laws
"So the response to police brutaly assaulting an "innocent" man is to riot and force police to be brutal? What a brilliant group of people. I guess I'm not smart enough to understand."
one of my favorite parts of the British government is that parliamentary sessions always open with a " discussion" of a bill about outlaws to prove some point about the monarchy, but it's so old and obscure no one even knows what the bill is
Comments
How did I not know about this?
Never again would we place our well-being in the hands of an outsider. Never again would we rely on the protection of a master.
I guess we're the masters now, but it's not like we can go anywhere.
Duh.
A les cheveux qui s'en vont
Et ses grosses mains d'étrangleur
Sentent le savons
Hyacinthe, Hyactinthe
J'lui confirai pas ma soeur
J'refuserai sont parapluie
Et j'prendrai pas l'ascenseur
Tou seul avec lui
Hyacinthe, Hyacinthe
Même s'il sent la camomille
Même s'il propose des cachous
Même si j'me sens en famille
En présence d'un fou
Hyacinthe
Il a un rire de fillette
Quand un oiseau du seigneur
Dans ses grosses mains d'étrangleur
Vient manger des miettes
Hyacinthe, Hyacinthe
C'est peut-être moi qui déraille
Mais si j'étais une caille
J'aimerai mieux mourir de faim
Qu de manger dans la main
De Hyacinthe, Hyacinthe...
Ce formidable boudin
Qu'en a fait Jeannine, plus d'un
Parc'qu'avec un air benoit
Il brise une noix
Moi-même je change de couleur
J'me sens devenir liquide
J'me sens tomber dans le vide
Quand Hyacinthe l'étrangleur
Croise mon chemin
Hyacinthe
Cheveux rare, barde noire
Je rajoute un entonoire
Dans un coin de mon cahier
Je fais le portrait de Hyacinthe
Malgrès mon trèfle à quatre feuille
Ma medaille de communion
J'vais plus aux WC tout seul
Sans aprehension
Hiacinthe, Hyacinthe...
Si vous rencontrez Hyacinthe
Avant que le jour s'enfuit
Alors que la cloche tinte
Alors qu'il s'ennuit
Sans un cris, sans une plainte
Sans un bruit, sans une quinte
Vous partirez faire fortune
Dans la région de la lune
Car lorqu'il pète un fusible
Il n'a plus de sentiments
Mais il a les pieds sensibles
Et dans son logement
Hyacinthe, Hyacinthe
Rentre ses pieds dans une bassine
Et romp avec le passer
Ca confience assassine
De fleur est tapissée
Hyacinthe, Hyacinthe...
Assassin poems, Poems that shoot
guns. Poems that wrestle cops into alleys
and take their weapons leaving them dead
║ no frog zone® : this is a pepe-free account ║
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(*off brand version of the Imperial March plays*)