Super Lazuli: The best way to deal with these kinds of loudmouthed, accusatory critics is to ask them how they carry these high and mighty ideals of theirs into the real world. As in, do they actively do anything according to their ideals to make the world a better place, and how? Do they put their words to action, or are they just another blowhard on the internet? This applies to both sides of the political coin, by the way.
That's pretty much my criteria for listening to what any "political activist" has to say. Most of them don't even cut close to this simple measure.
I know I can't make it through the day without downing a 80 proof fifth of liquor and yelling at a pony.
Also I feel like people might think I'm too nice because so far everything I've done has been fairly positive on the hashtagometer.
I did watch a bit of The Last Airbender and still don't like it very much; I could possibly do that but it'd require me to keep from ravaging it entirely (I do actually quite like the CGI in it but everything else is blah).
[2:53:54 AM] Blixty: Somtimes while riding high on the tidal waves of our successes, we forget to detonate the glacier of our doubts with the TNT of our self-confidence, to save the Titanic of our being.
[2:54:26 AM] ignatius2722: wat the fuck?
[2:55:28 AM] Blixty: And yet upon the sunrise of tomorrow, I shall eat the golden vegetable from the garden of Absolom, and yea, will I eat it deliciously. And I will declare "this golden vegetable doth taste of pizza pie."
[2:56:03 AM] ignatius2722: Are you a proophet now?
[2:56:10 AM] Blixty: I am a prophet
[2:56:13 AM] Blixty: of DICKS.
[2:56:20 AM] ignatius2722: Go to bed.
[2:56:26 AM] Blixty: Dicks! Dicks everywhere upon you and your people!
[2:56:50 AM] Blixty: Dicks in Seattle! Dicks in Washington! Dicks in New York! Dicks in Dubai!
[2:59:16 AM] Blixty: 'twas foretold by the Skittle God, 'twas m'lord.
Doctor Who reference in Pokemon B2W2? Headcanon accepted.
So, yesterday morning, I drove to THEIR church for this retreat. The first several hours consisted of sitting around in an all-purpose room and doing silly activites and icebreakers. There were only about 15-20 people there (ages 16-50 probably), but try as I did, I could not connect with them. I pretended to be religious, but it seemed as though their religion was all that there was to these people. While I was having my lunch of Cool Ranch Doritos (the only good part of this whole thing!), it dawned on me that I can connect better to atheists because they (we :)) are deeper people. We don't have this crap religion to fill all the voids in our personality, so we make up for it with actual purpose and being interesting. I wiped the Cool Ranch crumbs out of my beard, and, for the first time in 20 years, felt happy at church because of this realization.
Right before the end of the retreat, we had one last activity. We passed around a big plastic ball, and whoever was holding it had to talk about what he/she learned at the retreat. People spewed all this bullshit about love and Jesus and strength, and eventually the ball made its way to me. I had tied my Geoxes tight in preparation for this moment. I stood up, gently pushed the ball away, and said, "I'm sorry, but I can no longer go on like this. I am an atheist -- a proud, intelligent, skeptical atheist. Sitting around here today and hearing all of the nonsense flow from each of your mouths has shown me that I need to start living the life I want to live. I can no longer live this charade. I am an atheist, and as much as you think you love this imaginary sky magician, your children or grandchildren will be atheists once logic reigns supreme and Christianity is wiped out. Thank you and good day, sirs."
Just as I was about to walk away, some big guy grabbed the ball and threw it right at my face. Hours and hours of MUGEN have honed my reflexes pretty well, so I was able to roll to the side and dodge the ball as flew into the kitchen doorway behind me. The woman next to me then reached out and clawed at my neck, but I spun as I was standing up and I think my ponytail whipped into her eyes because she fell back. I heard angry shouts and people coming after me as I ran into the kitchen. I saw the ball sitting on the floor and one of the stove burners still on. Knowing science, I grabbed the ball and put it on top of the burners, and as the angry mob of "good Christians" filled the kitchen, the ball popped with a gunshot-like noise long enough to daze them. I was a bit high on adrenaline at the moment, so I pumped my fist in the air and shouted "Science always wins!" before I ran out of the kitchen, into the hallway, and out the door to my car. I popped in a Megadeth CD and floored it (left some tiremarks in their parking lot) and here I am now, in a strip mall parking lot on my laptop.
I'm afraid of what I will face when I get home. A priest has probably already contacted my family. Everyone else in my family is a devout Christian, I guess you could call them fundies. My mom and sister will be mad, but it's my dad that will be the worst. I don't doubt that he will be violent. I'm watching kenjutsu videos as I write this and I am going to stop at the woods nearby to find a nice sturdy branch, so I think I will be able to defend myself when the need arises. I'm glad that I did this, but I fear I will no longer be welcome in my home. I plan on spending the night here and going home in the morning when he will be at his weakest so I can gather my things.
Thanks for listening to what was probably the most life-changing day of my life and sorry for any typos.
TL;DR: I came out as an atheist at a church retreat, only to be chased out by a violent horde and now I might not be able to return home.
You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
I feel kinda lonely this morning...I wish Anonus were here. :\
You are the end result of a “would you push the button” prompt where the prompt was “you have unlimited godlike powers but you appear to all and sundry to be an impetuous child” – Zero, 2022
Would have liked to share this on FB for a couple of my librarian friends, and for all my book loving friends. Unfortunately, the FB share button doesn't seem to work.....
Dear god, have we really reached the point where Facebook users are too computer-illiterate to copy-paste a damn URL?
Would have liked to share this on FB for a couple of my librarian friends, and for all my book loving friends. Unfortunately, the FB share button doesn't seem to work.....
Dear god, have we really reached the point where Facebook users are too computer-illiterate to copy-paste a damn URL?
I would've responded to you, but I can't hit the quote button.
I am the worst person alive. I have not ever contact a girl who gave me her phone number 3 years ago. We were suppose to be friends or something. Stupid me.
Yeah, that's really the problem with that creepypasta. If the church is angry enough to form into a mob and try to kill you, they're not going to settle for calling your parents when you escape.
Comments
Moosism.
Hail your antlery overlord.
well
we all know that the cock is the symbol of the divine.
holy crap
:O
that is my shocked face
*re-converts*
i get so angry sometimes i just punch plankton --Klinotaxis
i get so angry sometimes i just punch plankton --Klinotaxis
I just read the phrase "pussy trap"
now I can never unread it.
Why did I decide to start reading Oglaf?
"Vulgar" is a bit of an understatement here.
In other news, I am a gyroball of translucent plasma.
I'm in that state of mind where this makes total fucking sense.
and now it's rendering as just the word [image]
well, that's okay too.
are you aware that doctors can jump three times their own height?
Some specialists can go even higher!
Provided with proper artistic stimulation, I am T.S. Elliot on crack cocaine.
A scripted wonder of joy and mystery.
Assassin poems, Poems that shoot
guns. Poems that wrestle cops into alleys
and take their weapons leaving them dead
I lost 20 pounds by dancing to a pop song sung by a guy with an eyepatch!
And I can introduce you to this program for only 1995 easy payments of $19.95!
I can't contact anyone to save my shitty life. This also applies to the internet.
i get so angry sometimes i just punch plankton --Klinotaxis
But Dave Mustaine is a Christian fundie like those people you were escaping. Should've put on Mercyful Fate
Assassin poems, Poems that shoot
guns. Poems that wrestle cops into alleys
and take their weapons leaving them dead
oh shit, the activity ball! D:
BURN THE HERETIC